to think he is making excuses?

[Heytheredeliah]

I went on three dates with a guy. Then he said the distance was too far to maintain a relationship. The distance between our houses is a 45 minute walk or around a 10 minute car journey (not exactly sure because I have never been in the car to his house) or around a 15-20 minute journey by bus and walking.

I find this very weird for two reasons. He goes to university in another city around an hour drive away. He moaned about the commute, but he still goes there so obviously it isn't really too far for him. I would not have minded walking to his place at all.

AIBU to think he is making excuses?

It doesn't matter if he is making excuse.

He's clearly not interested and has let you know.

His just not into you.

It's definitely an excuse. He's not obliged to get into a relationship with you obviously, but he could have said something less insulting to your intelligence.

He's making excuses. Next! Stop messaging him, wish him well and move on to someone better. If he wanted to make the effort then he would.

I would say that he is letting you know that there is no future in this.

Basically yes. He doesn't care enough to make the effort. Bin him.

Well yes, but wouldn't you rather that than him telling you what the real reason is, in case it's something you don't want to hear?

He is either making an excuse or is bloody lazy. Either way time to move on.

He could easily have said "I just don't feel a spark" or whatever rather than making up some nonsense or telling the harsh truth.

Who cares if he is making excuses or not. He has expressed he is not interested. Move on. YABU

Yes, he's making excuses. He's not interested in pursuing a relationship with you and thinks that blaming logistics is kinder than saying bluntly that he's decided he doesn't like you in that way.

I would say it's an excuse, he's trying to let you down nicely which is fair enough, he's not done anything wrong. Giving him the benefit of the doubt though, maybe on top of his travel for uni it feels too much for him. It's only been 3 dates, so better he stopped now than later down the line.

My personal go to was 'I don't feel a spark' as that covers everything.

I agree it's just an excuse. I just feel bitter and hurt over it. We slept together on the second and third dates and now he is saying this. I am just so annoyed. I snooped on his Instagram the other day (I know I shouldn't have) and I saw that he has added some photos with his friends and he is with a girl in one of the pictures. No clue who she is but it looks like he has already moved onto the next one