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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

How to tackle this with partner

10 replies

Cornycob1 · 12/10/2022 20:33

Partner works 6 days a week and then does a volunteer activity on Sundays and one evening a week until late. Then when he his home he’s working some more. He’s working really hard and it’s going really well and will make a big change to our future. The volunteer job he loves and it’s his escape from work but I’m struggling to spend time with him. Do I just suck it up for the short term?

OP posts:
Chicheguevara · 12/10/2022 20:34

Does your partner know how you feel about your struggling to get some time with him? Sometimes, the just don’t realise unless you say something.

OnlyHams · 12/10/2022 20:42

I’d be concerned you’re questioning how to tackle such a basic conversation with your partner

a simple ‘I don’t think we are getting enough time together with your work hours and voluntary role, can we have a think about how to carve out a bit more us time’ would do it

MrsTerryPratchett · 12/10/2022 20:46

Is it short term or is he a workaholic?

Cornycob1 · 12/10/2022 20:48

Well I can tell him how I feel but what is he going to do leave the volunteer toll stop earning a wage. I couldn’t make him leave the volunteer roll as it’s a roll that really needs volunteers and he loves it

OP posts:
Cornycob1 · 12/10/2022 20:49

It’s short term like a year maybe year and a half max

OP posts:
Cornycob1 · 12/10/2022 20:51

he knows how I feel as he’s said he needs more time in the week for everything and did consider getting rid of the volunteering a while ago

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 12/10/2022 20:52

If he's considered it, you can raise it.

OnlyHams · 12/10/2022 21:07

Cornycob1 · 12/10/2022 20:48

Well I can tell him how I feel but what is he going to do leave the volunteer toll stop earning a wage. I couldn’t make him leave the volunteer roll as it’s a roll that really needs volunteers and he loves it

Why would he have to leave

could he not just alternate weekends?

Purplehonesty2 · 12/10/2022 21:23

My dh works all the time. He has his own company, is building a house, takes on other jobs in the evenings. But what can I say? He's working hard for us - it won't be forever so I just remind myself how lucky we are to have such a great man.

Sucks tho when I want to do something nice at a weekend and he is in the yard grafting!!

OnTheBrinkOfChange · 12/10/2022 21:28

You're doing all the donkey work yet you have no guarantee you'll benefit long term as you're not married. I'd be very cautious.

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