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Original poster

Don't want to work my birthday.

38 replies

fio1981 · 11/10/2022 19:23

Hi,

My horrid birthday is coming up soon, made even more painful as my Mum's mum died on the actual day last year and I'm just dreading telling Mum I've got stuck working all of said birthday Friday, then complete weekend to and then to top it all working her birthday Monday too (our birthdays fall a couple of days apart)

I started a new job a good few weeks ago now and our Manager is an akin to a pass the parcel scenario there is now 3 managers names but they all pass the buck onto each other. I've really messed up thinking the shift work we're doing would start sooner so the patterns would have been known sooner and all this could have been discussed sooner and that I would cop the first weekend to work but it never happened that way, but it feels like someone in new job saw my id dob and went on to base all painful shifts around the time I would welcome being off the most. Unfortunately I can't swap with anyone or see no way how it would work if I were to.

I've tried putting in a holiday request on the 3rd Oct for just a single day so giving plenty of notice just for a single day but still not approved and I'm concerned it being left to the 17th to be looked at would just be too late.

I know some pain has been to endured and there will be other birthdays that come around again and this is all just unfortunate, It's just always going to be a problem in this company I've joined with them planning me to work every third and half of the 4th weekend of a month. I feel as it's my weekend to work then won't they always have a reason to stop me taking holiday?

OP posts:
everythingsokay · 12/10/2022 10:12

onlythreenow · 11/10/2022 20:07

Given that you have only been in the new job a few weeks I think you are a bit cheeky expecting time off. I mean this gently, but your Mum will just have to cope with the anniversary of her Mum's death the same way most of the rest of the world does. As for it being your birthday - I started my new job of the actual day of my birthday, and had to work a full day (I generally only work mornings). That's just life, it doesn't always go our way.

🙄 you can take annual leave entitlement anytime you want to (unless of course rune periods are excluded in your contract, eg., I can’t take annual leave in December) … how’s it cheeky?!

HangOnToYourself · 12/10/2022 10:32

onlythreenow · 12/10/2022 09:51

You have heard of annual leave, no? It's this amazing thing where people can book a day off for whatever reason they like.

Of course I've heard of annual leave, but people generally don't expect it just weeks into a new job, and also the employer is allowed to turn down a request if it doesn't suit them. No wonder the UK is in such a sorry state - the entitlement of people is mind boggling!

The entitlement of people wanting to use the peace that they are legally entitled to take 😂 mind blowing stuff that. Are you a business owner by any chance?

onlythreenow · 12/10/2022 19:52

No I'm not a business owner, and I don't live in the UK. Here employers are allowed to decline holiday requests for a good reason. It seems in the "entitled" UK that doesn't apply - so if half the staff were off sick, the business was undergoing a busy period, and several people were already on leave you would just take time off because you were entitled to??? I feel sorry for business owners if that is the case. Working for someone doesn't mean you should have all the rights and they have none. It seems people in the UK are constantly demanding their employers should give, give give, with nothing going the other way.

everythingsokay · 12/10/2022 22:08

onlythreenow · 12/10/2022 19:52

No I'm not a business owner, and I don't live in the UK. Here employers are allowed to decline holiday requests for a good reason. It seems in the "entitled" UK that doesn't apply - so if half the staff were off sick, the business was undergoing a busy period, and several people were already on leave you would just take time off because you were entitled to??? I feel sorry for business owners if that is the case. Working for someone doesn't mean you should have all the rights and they have none. It seems people in the UK are constantly demanding their employers should give, give give, with nothing going the other way.

It seems people in the UK are constantly demanding their employers should give, give give, with nothing going the other way

Oh have a day off, most workers in the UK are working for wages that don’t meet the cost and living and the rise in inflation.

HangOnToYourself · 13/10/2022 12:33

onlythreenow · 12/10/2022 19:52

No I'm not a business owner, and I don't live in the UK. Here employers are allowed to decline holiday requests for a good reason. It seems in the "entitled" UK that doesn't apply - so if half the staff were off sick, the business was undergoing a busy period, and several people were already on leave you would just take time off because you were entitled to??? I feel sorry for business owners if that is the case. Working for someone doesn't mean you should have all the rights and they have none. It seems people in the UK are constantly demanding their employers should give, give give, with nothing going the other way.

If you don't live in the UK maybe stop bleating on about things you dont understand? Nobody here demands anything, they request a day leave (for any reason they like, even their bloody birthday if they so wish) just like anywhere else and it can either be approved or declined based on staffing/workload. I dont know what it is you think is so obscene about this?

ThatGirlInACountrySong · 13/10/2022 12:48

You have a problem if you are already slagging managers!

Your company employ you....not your mother

And also, why did you not mention you have those days booked as holiday, when offered the job? They would then be honoured

ThatGirlInACountrySong · 13/10/2022 12:48

And yes, stressing about birthdays is rather childish

HangOnToYourself · 13/10/2022 12:53

ThatGirlInACountrySong · 13/10/2022 12:48

And yes, stressing about birthdays is rather childish

Is wanting to support your mother on the anniversary of a bereavement also childish? Because you seem to have conveniently ignored that as the actual reason op wants her birthday off

ThatGirlInACountrySong · 13/10/2022 13:16

Could we all have time off to support relatives in that case? Where does that idea end?

gogohmm · 13/10/2022 13:18

I seriously doubt they paid any attention to your birthday when they arranged the rotas which you imply, plus they wouldn't know about your grandmother.

You have put in an annual leave request. Or try approaching a colleague to swop shifts?

If you have set shifts generally you need to give a significant amount of notice because they will need to allocate extra staff to cover you, harder to source at short notice (those of us in roles where there is no cover it's easier because I simply have to catch up on my return)

Augend23 · 13/10/2022 13:20

onlythreenow · 12/10/2022 09:51

You have heard of annual leave, no? It's this amazing thing where people can book a day off for whatever reason they like.

Of course I've heard of annual leave, but people generally don't expect it just weeks into a new job, and also the employer is allowed to turn down a request if it doesn't suit them. No wonder the UK is in such a sorry state - the entitlement of people is mind boggling!

I've got 7 days off in my first 3 weeks of a new role - pre booked holiday, it is what it is. It's inconvenient. I don't understand why a single day off a few weeks in is "entit

Augend23 · 13/10/2022 13:20

Entitled" *

HangOnToYourself · 13/10/2022 16:27

ThatGirlInACountrySong · 13/10/2022 13:16

Could we all have time off to support relatives in that case? Where does that idea end?

Well yes, its annual leave you can use it for whatever you like 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

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