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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think younger adults are too compliant.

150 replies

antelopevalley · 09/10/2022 16:54

We all know things have been hard for lots of people over the last three years, but so many younger adults have been shafted. From high house prices, to very high rents for substandard accommodation, cuts to schools, high student debt for poorly taught courses, closure of so many public services that supports young people struggling into adulthood, and increasing homelessness.

But the only pushback I really see is on social media where "boomers" get blamed. While in life they are getting jobs, working hard and trying often against the odds to make their life better.

Why are they so compliant? Why are they not rioting? Or at least organising against the rich? Why so little evidence of any kind of fightback?

OP posts:
MistressoftheDarkSide · 26/11/2022 17:55

I have concerns and reservations about several on trend issues. It’s almost impossible to have a conversation about them without being accused of “wrongthink”.

So mostly I say nothing.

maeveiscurious · 26/11/2022 17:58

We live in a democratic society, if people want change go through the right channels to get things done.

You can change policies but it takes time.

MistressoftheDarkSide · 26/11/2022 17:59

Ridicule can be borne - being unable to work, support oneself or one’s family is trickier. And that’s where punishment can lead.

ILoveeCakes · 26/11/2022 17:59

MistressoftheDarkSide · 26/11/2022 17:55

I have concerns and reservations about several on trend issues. It’s almost impossible to have a conversation about them without being accused of “wrongthink”.

So mostly I say nothing.

I think there are some very dangerous things being promoted these days - and by adults who should know better to kids who are young and impressionable.

When some of these kids are older, they will say "How could you have done this to me? I was just a kid and you were meant to be the adults looking out for me"

There are going to be some horrendous and heartbreaking cases.

But I don't want to derail the thread with specific issues - please people don't feel this is the time to jump on your soapbox about it.

thehorsehasnowbolted · 26/11/2022 18:01

I have been an activist for many years. Ridicule and punishment is inevitable

Fine if you are an activist.

But people (and in particular the young, as you have mentioned) should read a lot more and truly educate themselves before thinking of pushing for causes.

I see a lot of activists nowadays jumping on bandwagons of trendy issues because 'it's the thing to do' and for FB 'likes'. And the consequences of what they are seeking can be dire (e.g. climate change tackling if not done properly can destroy civilisation, which is what we are starting to see now)

They are also very violent and think nothing of destroying someone else's property or indirectly causing someone's death. That will always be a no from me

MistressoftheDarkSide · 26/11/2022 18:06

@ILoveeCakes

Agreed.

Too many issues and too much vested interest in keeping us all at each other’s throats.

More important to try and gain common ground and the constant generational animosity grinds my gears.

My peer group ranges from my own age group to pensioners and teenagers. Mostly I have things in common across the board and can see where different views arise and take them on board.

All I want is a safe, equitable and harmonious society, and I do believe it’s achievable.

However I suspect my gravestone will read along the lines of:

”Bless, she was so naive”.

Brokendaughter · 26/11/2022 18:08

Because they grew up so watched they don't even know people don't have to live under a microscope.

They don't remember things were not always this way & don't appear able to manage to imagine it could or even should be different.

Nobody sobbed on tv that 'people were spoiling stuff', they got angry & tried to do something about it.

Now, it's all social media posts & weepy soundbites which do sweet FA, while complying with so many unnecessary rules they have no power left to effect change anyway.

Kpo58 · 26/11/2022 18:11

been and done it. · 26/11/2022 17:42

Perhaps if the majority of the younger generation got off their arses and voted things might be very different.

Not if there is no-one worth voting for. I have given up voting as every time there are 3-4 candidates for each the same 2 parties which I don't want to vote for. If there is someone I want, then they won't be a choice where I live. So it seems rather pointless to bother.

Zipps · 26/11/2022 18:23

They have bank of mum and dad/grandparents and a lot of them have had inheritances or will receive inheritance in order to get a deposit towards or to buy a house one day. They have parents who live in huge houses so that their kids can go back home if the going gets tough or downsize and give out wads of cash

They aren't spoiled particularly just have different expectations and standards. They don't want to sacrifice 'now' for 'later'. They haven't really struggled but having said that I wouldn't want them to, those days should be over. I find them all very polite and fairly uncomplaining unlike some of the baby boomers who did have it easier yet call them snowflakes and are as rude af.

Blossomtoes · 26/11/2022 18:26

walkingonsunshinekat · 26/11/2022 16:38

Its not just the Tories and the UK, we aren't exactly seeing Europe on fire are we?

The problem is, peaceful protest is ALWAYS ignored, so take the Brexit protests, we were all very well behaved, 1m plus people going about their business quietly, no threat to the Govt or society... place in the "ignore" pile.

Poll tax riots, Paris Student riots, Yellow vest movement, Suffragettes? these were not ignored and if those Brexit protestors had smashed up & burned central London, they'd have been a totally different outcome.

Yes @Blossomtoes there is a sharp rise in support for the tory party once over 45, who knows if that will remain the case, i'd still bet on a Tory win in 2024.

there is a sharp rise in support for the tory party once over 45, who knows if that will remain the case, i'd still bet on a Tory win in 2024.

The age at which the majority of voters turn Tory seems to be from 55 onwards. I bet my house the next government won’t be Tory - and that we won’t have to wait until 2024.

www.ukonward.com/data/age-profie-voting-intention/

antelopevalley · 26/11/2022 18:28

@Zipps There is a real divide. On the one hand young adults who get handouts and will have a large inheritance. On the other young adults on very low wages, living in house shares and with no support or help, including from the government.

OP posts:
MNMH · 26/11/2022 18:31

antelopevalley · 09/10/2022 16:54

We all know things have been hard for lots of people over the last three years, but so many younger adults have been shafted. From high house prices, to very high rents for substandard accommodation, cuts to schools, high student debt for poorly taught courses, closure of so many public services that supports young people struggling into adulthood, and increasing homelessness.

But the only pushback I really see is on social media where "boomers" get blamed. While in life they are getting jobs, working hard and trying often against the odds to make their life better.

Why are they so compliant? Why are they not rioting? Or at least organising against the rich? Why so little evidence of any kind of fightback?

They are though. There are plenty of stories out there of them doing so.

MNMH · 26/11/2022 18:33

IncompleteSenten · 09/10/2022 17:20

You said exactly why.

They're busy on social media.

That's what they're choosing. Yelling on twitter, twerking on tiktok, being stupid on YouTube. 🤷

Yep! That's what the entire generation is doing! You sure pegged them!

thehorsehasnowbolted · 26/11/2022 18:35

I bet my house the next government won’t be Tory - and that we won’t have to wait until 2024.

We know Blossom, you post this on every thread* *😉

ILoveeCakes · 26/11/2022 18:39

antelopevalley · 26/11/2022 18:28

@Zipps There is a real divide. On the one hand young adults who get handouts and will have a large inheritance. On the other young adults on very low wages, living in house shares and with no support or help, including from the government.

The way I see it, since the end of WW2 (say, for the sake of picking a time point) the average person/"pleb" has had the chance to own property and build savings etc. In the past, the property owning/savings having "class" was pretty low.

Over time, we've naturally get a range of outcomes with how families have/have been able to benefit from these decades - earning money, growing it, keeping it, passing it down etc. House prices are partly a function of that - more and more people having more and more money *, so they can pay up for a house - while more and more people who only have the money from their work can't.

The divide will get bigger as a result and I think there is only so much a government can or should do about that. I certainly don't think they should rob everyone's family money. But I feel for the people who work hard and deserve the pride and security of a reasonable standard of living.

Things like this make me wonder what the future holds. A lot of angry people who feel exploited all the time? Who don't feel they have a material stake in society so they are happy to see it "burn"?

I don't know and I know even less what the solution might be.

*I have a number of clients with property portfolios. One in particular spends none of that money and instead buys 1 new property a year with the rental profits. Try competing with that!

OhIdoLike2bBesideTheSeaside · 26/11/2022 18:50

Most people just get on with it to be honest
Too busy and tired to have the time and energy to complain and it gets you nowhere

MistressoftheDarkSide · 26/11/2022 18:57

I have a theory. You may call it a conspiracy theory if you like.

There is a certain amount of natural chaos generated by the rate of progression in the modern world.

The global capitalist model is designed to capitalise on and profit from that. Modern marketing came into its own during WW2 and has been refined on a scientific and psychological basis ever since. Technology has massively helped.

The power of private corporations and their enmeshment with governments provides fertile ground for both economic and ideological agendas. You may, if you like, throw in a religious garnish from some quarters.

As chaos and instability ramps up, any policy or agenda that appears to solve the problems of the disenfranchised and disenchanted who live in a constant state of exhausting insecurity, can be presented without too much scrutiny. History has shown this to be true. It doesn’t matter too much to average Joe where it might lead, or whether there is any underlying unpalatable consequences if suddenly you have a roof over your head, a job, food on the table and education for your children.

The pandemic gave us an interesting snap shot into how frightened people will accept any solution from authority especially if questioning an alleged state of emergency becomes verboten and “wrong think”.

Isolation from the tribe can feel like too high a price to pay for going against the tribe.

My theory is that before too long, centralised digital currency and its reliance on surveillance technology and the ability to control the population through its money will be welcomed.

This has been tested in China, and also to a limited extent during the trucker protests.

State over reach is being turned over to private interests whose main objective is profit.Corporations can already sue governments deemed to interfere with their ability to profit.

Meanwhile the hamsters have to keep turning the wheels or starve.

I’m not opposed to technology by the way, used ethically it is an absolute boon.

Criticism is made in this thread of the younger generations being locked into their phones and social media. Do you think that’s by accident or design?

Puzzledandpissedoff · 26/11/2022 19:05

I see a lot of activists nowadays jumping on bandwagons of trendy issues because 'it's the thing to do' and for FB 'likes'

Ain't that the truth

Fortunately sensible channels still exist for making views known and pushing for change, but they tend to involve more effort than clicking away on a keypad and that's when the apathy becomes obvious. I'd be a very rich woman if I had a quid for every meeting I've chaired where someone insists - usually waving something about - that we've GOT to do such-and-such, only to disappear when it comes to actually doing it

thehorsehasnowbolted · 26/11/2022 19:11

Lots of plausible ideas in what you've posted MistressoftheDarkSide

ILoveeCakes · 26/11/2022 19:36

@MistressoftheDarkSide I think we share a lot of thoughts.

I know some people will shout "conspiracy theorists" but an awful lot can be explained simply by the desire of people and businesses to make money.

If the idea that "people will do bad things or sell bad ideas for money" is a bonkers conspiracy theory, then I don't know what to say. I might even have a bridge they might like to buy! ;)

Squirrelvillage · 26/11/2022 19:42

I'm exhausted and don't have the energy to organise uprisings, and I do not attend political events as I'm worried about violence/being arrested/the police. Plus, I just don't think the government, or anyone with any power to do anything, cares what I do or don't do.

thehorsehasnowbolted · 26/11/2022 19:48

I know some people will shout "conspiracy theorists"

It's puzzling that people continue to call them 'conspiracy theories' as it doesn't take long to find 'global leaders' speaking very openly about their intentions. They are very clear about the direction in which they want things to go

ILoveeCakes · 26/11/2022 19:59

thehorsehasnowbolted · 26/11/2022 19:48

I know some people will shout "conspiracy theorists"

It's puzzling that people continue to call them 'conspiracy theories' as it doesn't take long to find 'global leaders' speaking very openly about their intentions. They are very clear about the direction in which they want things to go

True. I don't research whether the moon landing happened or not. But I did watch some WEF videos (on their own YT channel) and I found them and their ideas for the future pretty disturbing.

But, yes, you mention the WEF and you get called a right wing, Trumper, MAGA, holocaust denying whatever. At least, you do on on internet. IRL, I suspect most people wouldn't know what I was on about. Like the posters above, most just keep their heads down and do their thing. I respect that and wish I could be a bit more like that sometimes - especially as it's not like I'm going to change or do anything. Well, except pay cash for everything - use it or lose it - and less data for the TechBros to harvest and sell! *

*On that, paying cash causes me to notice if others are. I have seen increasing cash use at the supermarket over the past few months. Last week was notable as there were 3 shops in a row (mine being no 3) paid for with cash. Not small ones either. It's the British way - say nothing but do little things like that to make your point!

Zipps · 26/11/2022 20:04

antelopevalley · 26/11/2022 18:28

@Zipps There is a real divide. On the one hand young adults who get handouts and will have a large inheritance. On the other young adults on very low wages, living in house shares and with no support or help, including from the government.

Yes there are but I wonder how many of those young people have grandparents sitting with a fortune in the bank? Older generations have benefited from cheap houses, good pensions and savings rates and because their parents died much younger often inherited. I know from work that a lot of them don't even know what they are worth especially if they bought houses in the 60'/70s and stayed there. Some of them actually think they are poor! They're reluctant to give it away because it's not what their parents did and they might need it and you know young people are reckless. They won't downsize then when they are in their late 70's-mid 80's they start thinking about giving a bit away because of inheritance tax, especially if they see the care home coming for it.
Too fucking late! They should have started giving it away 15/20 years ago. Their kids have paid off their mortgages and they are in their 50's/60's and they can't understand why their grandkids are renting fgs.
We're aiming at early 60's to start gifting and spending more to reduce inheritance tax.

BeyondMyWits · 26/11/2022 20:37

My 22 year old daughter is politically active, a member of the Socialist party as well as her uni Socialist society. She attends rallies, marches, goes leafleting and door knocking with her local candidates etc. I see her occasionally on the news and social media. She has the fervour of youth.

I do not share her politics. That does not matter. I'm proud of the fact she cares enough to stand and be counted.