Scared to get MH support because of stigma attached

[procedmetolikejim]

I suffered a bad patch of luck, or events in a row, a few years ago.

As a result I think I had stress induced psychosis. It was tough - but as soon as I heard voices and started feeling anxious, I contacted my GP who referred me for support etc and gave me antipsychotic medication

Fine. The support was good for the mental illness side of things

18 months later I almost died of a septic gallbladder because nobody believed me?! About the pain I was in. It was horrendous. I simply wasn't taken seriously.

I almost died. Because I had a MH problem at the time, but was completely sane and took my medication, took every possible self help measure and was doing well. But it was as if my name was black listed?

Anyway, more recently I had bad fatigue. I requested bloods as I suspected anaemia (had it a lot in the past). I was right. I was significantly anaemia.

But I had to fight my GP to get the blood test! He kept asking if I thought it was mental health related, did I need support there instead?

I'm now hearing my name being called constantly, on and off. It's really irritating. My anxiety is through the roof. I feel like I'm being followed. It's awful, but I know it's not real. I also know I need help

What do I do? I feel so sad that if I support myself and get help for my MH, you're forever taken for a fool or questioned regarding anything physical going forwards

You articulate this very well and I'm sorry you've experienced it.

Did you stop taking the antipsychotic medication?

I think you need to go and seek help. Otherwise it could get worse.

@northernlola yes, but the psychiatrist knew (I was discharged from MH postnatal services too around that time).

I didn't just stop taking them because I 'thought I was better'. It wasn't overnight, and the psychiatrist was happy for me not to be on them any longer as they are a strong med with side effects (Risperidone)

I'm just at a point now that I know I need to seek further help but feel so angry that I've got to - health professionals look at you different and question first off if you're 'symptoms' are you being mentally unwell - until in my case, for example, you turn septic and need emergency surgery because you weren't listened to

Yes, sorry that's what I meant. I wasn't implying you stopped taking them without the doctor's knowledge.

@northernlola oh no I didn't think you were implying that! I was just elaborating to be clear as I know someone else would've probably asked me that on this thread, if I had just stopped taking them etc :)

Gosh OP that sounds so tough and frustrating. I don’t have any solutions but giving you a bump. I think ultimately you have to deal with the most urgent issue now, which is your mental health. And then then worry about the other stuff afterwards. You sound like you know yourself really well which is great. Wishing you the best of luck x

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with asking for help. The stigma isn’t as bad as it used to be and even if it was I would say don’t worry about it. It takes more courage to ask for help than it does to do nothing. Hope everything works out ok for you.

I am always asked if I think my medical things could be anxiety related. I have never had MH problems and never needed support in that area, and I am grateful for that. So please don't assume it's because of your history, I assume it's because I'm a woman!

You must get the help you need, there is no other choice but your not wrong to be upset with the fact that you have to think about this.