1 year No Saving but I have responsibilities ?!

[Peachh]

I will be 30 in 2 years, I have a 7 year old and I am SP.
I want to buy a house but in London it’s very hard obviously and I only have £10k saved. Am I being irresponsible and delusional to want to have 1 year of no saving, just spending freely, buying whatever, going on holidays and treating DC. I have £5k in debt, tone of Student loans which I will be paying back for forever but now earn good money.

Convince me not to (I have some what already started as we went on holiday for the first time since the pandemic and I spent like there was no limit).

Surely you can find some middle ground. Save a certain % and as your salary increases so will your sum.
The problem with having a year of spending madly is both you and your child will get used to that lifestyle. It'll be more difficult for the child to adjust when you go back to saving hard again than it will for you.
Life is for living but living isn't just about holidays and treats, its about the stuff you're taking for granted like paying bills, having food and heating.

But your circumstances are different?

My total outgoings each month is around 1.5 to 1.6K then I have a decent amount left over. I only saved the 10K in the last year and have not over paid on the debt as I have a interest free credit card for the next 28months. I received a very good promotion that doubled my earnings in 2020. I don’t have the best relationship with money not sure how to change that.

I love the idea of this. Pretty impractical in reality but why not limit it to 2 months and a maximum amount? If you had a free-for-all month in let's say July in DC's summer holidays and December it's spaced out and you have something to look forward to. It would also help you to be more disciplined in planning your purchases. Or perhaps the month of DC's birthday?

You really cannot see the difference between being a 28 year old single parent with a seven year old relying on you and being a double income no kids professional couple in your thirties?

I listened to 'The Meaningful Money Handbook' on audible and found it really useful. You need a come up with a budget and give each pound a "job", and include fun stuff and savings. You don't have to choose between living like a pauper and saving every penny, or spending without thinking. Neither sound like a good idea tbh.

I would focus on paying your debt off before anything else. Sounds like you're in a great position with your earning power though.

You are all right and @TarasChoc i know I need to realise the material impact of just 1 salary.

I guess I’m trying to flesh it out in my head and I actually had not thought about the impact of having to return to tighter spending for myself and DC. Thanks to those who also pointed this out.

You are not single, other than being a single parent, therefore not free to spend, spend, spend even though you sound like you are on a healthy salary.

Sad state of affairs isn’t it you’re on good money and can’t buy in london. I’m not on as much as you but I’m a higher rate tax payer which to be honest I’d never thought would happen, teenage mum, told my life was written off kind of thing. I grew up in Wales, all my friends own nice properties bar one. I could own a lovely house there on my own. Yet here I’m limited to a small flat if I did buy now, and only that as I’ve saved 40k deposit (and again only as I’ve had free housing for the last 2.5yrs).

I'm in a similar position to you, long term renting and know that I could save about £10k a year if we went without anything above the essentials. However, I would then in a few years time ( kids are older) be in a house bigger than I needed and would have missed out on having experiences such as days out and holidays with them whilst they were growing up to fund it.

I have made my peace with a happy medium. We have fun with some of it but I also save for the kids and make good pension contributions. Owning a home isn't something that will happen for me without sacrifices I'm not willing to make.

Thanks will definitely read this! I am a person of extremes I scrimped extremely hard when getting my first rented place with DC. Then I got a new job and was pretty lax with saving then got my promotion. I need to return to being more disciplined.

Isn't there a compromise? Like save a bit less and allocate a budget each month for silly spending - "just for you" stuff.

£5000 is really not much of an emergency fund, let alone a house deposit.

What line of work are you in that you expect to have your pay rise so quickly?

It’s definitely possible in banking, but then so is losing your job without warning.

At the moment you have no buffer, so any unexpected event can easily become a crisis.

I think spending on experiences is great, and enriching for your DC (and you of course!) but you do have to think about what you can sustain long term for DC.

It would be quite unfair to sign DC up for an expensive hobby/club, get them really into it for a year, make friends etc then have to say "Well, that's got to stop now" - you know? In the same way, you wouldn't enrol them in private school for a year then switch them into the local comp, right?

No wonder you see posts here all the time about people with kids struggling financially. But then get offended when people suggest personal responsibility/saving.

@Darbs76 You should be extremely proud of yourself. How old are you can I ask? If you increase you salary gradually I am sure you can buy a flat soon and climb the ladder with the next property. I agree sad as PP said it feels so long away the incentive is some what reduced. Well done and keep going you really are not in a bad place to get one the ladder soon! If I had 40K I definitely would be a lot happier!

You mentioned that you have quite a bit of disposable income left after bills - could you allocate a certain percentage to deposit saving, a certain percentage to rainy day funds, and then have fun spending the rest? That would probably work better in the long term

To clarify my 2020 earning were doubled by my promotion. Funny enough I work in Finance, I moved into a area that is on the up and in demand. The company I work for is very stable. The only uncertainty I may face in the near future is if I decide to move to a more risk company. I do currently have 1k emergency fund for unexpected stuff should have mentioned that.

Spend what you like, but to be honest this is a common attitude among people who say they are "bad with money". They always find excuses to spend it like I just can't help it/everyone in our generation spends like this/it's for my dc/it's because house prices are depressing, or act like the only other option is living like a pauper - "why should I live like that?!"

Well if you are on decent money there's not two options, suffer or splurge. Take a middle ground. It's nice to have a few treats, but really the best things in life are free - time outside in parks and nature, spending time with dc, having friends over. Just shopping and spending for the sake of "having the best" isn't really that fulfilling.

Yup, agree

Oh and I've also heard your excuse/reasoning of "I'll spend lots now and get it out of my system, then I won't spend any after that" before from self confessed bad with money people. It never works out that way, I never met someone who stopped spending after the time frame.

No don't do it. If a financial crisis starts lots of jobs will tumble. You may need your £5k for living costs. Think of your child and their long term needs.

Thanks for the frank and honest evaluation. You are right the bigger issue is that I am bad with money. If I don’t address that I will have excuses as long as my arm. I am going to try and find a middle ground.

As an older person , I would urge you to take full advantage if your youthful age and enjoy. Life us definitely for living .
But it doesn't have to be all or nothing does it. The financial plan I always followed with disposable income was Spend Some, Save Some and Invest Some . Maybe place a sum in a high interest fund to access in 4 or 5 years . Have one biggish holiday a year while your DC is still young and not costing too much ( compared to taking a teenager! ) Don't throw it away on crap like clothes or stuff , make it worthwhile .

Life us definitely for living.

Definitely, but once the basics are covered, "spending" doesn't equal "living".