The pandemic has made introverts into extroverts and vice versa

[MrsTerryPratchett]

Bear with me. Last night I thought I was going to get some alone time and didn't. I was very annoyed. I'm a massive extrovert but DH working from home means I am NEVER alone in the house. Never. Being forced into the house during the lockdowns has made me really want and need alone time.

I have introvert friends though who now try to be more social than they used to because being locked in the house has made them realise there's a limit.

I'm going to do a PhD and be famous.

I was an introvert before the pandemic. Lack of socialising during the lockdowns made me realise the problem was in fact the people I was surrounded by outside of my house, and I wasn’t that introverted really. I realised the people around me made me a permanent grey rock. I’ve kept them all at permanent arms length since the pandemic, and I’m much more sociable with people who I didn’t know pre-pandemic. I think the pandemic just brought into sharp focus peoples individual lives and made everyone realise life is too short. So now people have learnt to be truer to themselves.

Ahh right. Your life was very different to mine then! I didn't set foot in my office until October 2021, then Covid rates went up again and we didn't go back until March this year. I was fully jabbed in July (age 39) and was still cautious all last winter. I lost a family member who was younger than me to Covid so was understandably worried about it. I guess if you had to go into work life must have felt much more normal.

I agree and its woefully understood. But an awful lot of people seemed to join the introvert bandwagon during lockdowns. As if it were some weird badge of honour.

Most of these people weren't actually introverts they were just grumpy.

Nope, still an introvert. I loved lockdown.

I was an extrovert before and now I'm just an extrovert with serious anxiety that I won't get the social interaction I need to the point where I can't cope and have to stay in!

DH WFH for 15 months and as much as I love him, it was fucking awful having my home, and our childcare setting comandeered as his office. He was in his own room, but the sound carries through the house regardless to the point that I could tell which colleagues he was talking to by the tone of his voice.

I need a combination of solitude and mixed adult company to thrive, and being trapped with only a family of 3 others and catering for their needs relentlessly for the first 6 months was pretty soul destroying.

I had always thought I was extroverted, and I am to some degree, but having children made me realise that I craved company rather than solitude because until then because I naturally had enough alone time.
I did hit the point in spring 2021 where there'd been that many knock backs that it was really hard to pick back life up yet again and felt so emotionally flat and demotivated. It was like I'd been institutionalised into staying the fuck at home and took a while into realising that the door was open. It's only really from this spring that a tentative normal has grown more confident. Doing things out of routine has felt like a chore but I have done them and not regretted it.

Given the choice, I'd be hard pressed to pick between a weekend on my own in the mountains or living it up with friends 😂

I used to be an extrovert. But I had a terrible pandemic ( like a bad war) and now I don't want to meet anyone because I am still licking my wounds.

Oh also DH and I both WFH and now I dont want to go anywhere with him:(

I'm definitely happier spending extended periods in my own company than I used to be - I was going in that direction anyway with age, but I think lockdown accelerated the shift as it was forced on me to such an extent that I didn't really have a choice but to get used to it. I also spend a lot more time than I used to trying to get out of the area I live in, as I got deathly bored of walking around it every day. Other than that I'm not sure it's changed my personality very much really.

I agree.

I used to be out all the time and thought I was an extrovert.

But then lockdown hit and I absolutely loved being at home. It turns out that I just always felt I should he doing things and actually didn't miss seeing people, going to exhibitions, plays, restaurants etc at all.

I had a combination of FOMO (fear of missing out) and guilt about not seeing people or doing worthwhile stuff.

No longer! I accept that I am an introvert and am much happier for it.

I still go to plays and exhibitions. I just see them on my own as I cba anymore to seek company.

Riveting stuff for your Phd, OP!

Same.

Yes, I was much more extrovert and social pre-pandemic.
I worked throughout, out of the house, and found that enforced quiet and rest, outside of work, was nice.
There was one friend I used to make a lot of effort with. Something happened to make me realise that I put far more energy into our friendship than she did, so I stepped back. While we are still friends, i don't put myself or organise our meet ups like I used to, so we don't see each other much. I miss it, but I don't have enough energy for two anymore.
I've also found going out, talking in a social setting very tiring.

I'm an introvert but absolutely hated the lockdown.

However when it came to the volunteer Christmas party last year, I was relieved it wasn't going ahead. I get that other people would have been sad and disappointed but not me. I get social anxiety being around too many people so I always decline such events and get togethers.

I'm happy as I am.

I kind of agree. I'm an introvert and would make excuses to not go anywhere at all. I love / LOVED staying in on my own. But yes I have started saying yes more and going places I wouldn't usually.

Not for me.
I was an introvert before, I’m even worse now.
I go to work, I come home and never leave the house In between.

I have introvert friends though who now try to be more social than they used to because being locked in the house has made them realise there's a limit.

I get this. I am hugely introverted but getting to work from home for 100% of the time initially and now about 70% has been the most joyous working experience of my adult life.

Being able to take a break from other people means I'm not constantly exhausted come the end of the working day, and more likely to want to socialise after work in a way I never did before.

I wonder if putting everything on pause (for those who weren’t frontline workers who were never locked down) gave people time to work out what they actually wanted in terms of socialising.

A lot of socialising can be obligation driven. Removing it allows you to reassess and maybe return to life being more intentional in your socialising and feeling less obligated to meet people if you don’t want to. It could go either way (more or less introverted/extroverted) from where you identified in 2019.

If it makes sense I expect credit in your phd please 😛

DH has recently started to travel a lot for work, but before that he was WFH all the time. We actually moved because the house we had before just wasn’t conducive for WFH.

I am really enjoying having a bit more space.

If it makes sense I expect credit in your phd please

Potty and Pratchett 2022 Pandemic effects on persistent personality traits does have a certain ring to it. Although too many Ps.

I read somewhere that we all naturally become more introverted as we age.
FWIW I'm still mainly an introvert - there's been no long lasting changes to that.

I like the PhD title. I started in middle so stayed in middle, lol.

Nope I’m still very much an introvert.

I defo struggle with work things.

For example, at a recent company away day I found it sooooooooo exhausting. So many new people, so much chat and so much socialising with strangers.

I know it wouldn't have phased me at all in the past.

I agree but I think it's temporary. I started thinking I was much less introverted than I am but as of earlier today when I told my phone to fuck off because it pinged... I realise its business as normal. Phone is back on permanent do not disturb again.