Do women walk alone at night

[aDayattheLido]

Do you?
Do women you know?

DNiece is at university. She came to visit me the other weekend. Her train back to uni was going to arrive after dark. I gave her some money for a taxi from the station to her halls. She said "oh I'll just walk" (but still took the £20 🙂). She says she walks back from the library and her part time job.

Is this normal or do women walk in pairs/packs or get a taxi?

(btw This was discussed on another thread but before anyone cries "TAAT" I'm just interested in chatting about it further)

I'm genuinely baffled as to how people who say they never do live their lives?? Do you just stay at home all winter??

Of course 😆

Although I don’t live in a city or big town. I don’t know if I would feel so comfortable then. I used to walk back from my restaurant job every night at nearly midnight. I have horses so used to dark mornings/evenings in remote locations. Been doing that for 30 years. Maybe I’ve just been lucky.

Err yeah, I live in suburbia now and I do and I've lived in London and did then too, couldn't avoid it to be honest as I got public transport everywhere. I walked home at night the other night and weirdly I felt more scared and nervous doing it in a town than I did in London, probably because it was so quiet. I wouldn't walk down a dark ally or anything but it's unavoidable for women to not walk on their own...

Yes I walk (or cycle, or run) places at night by myself, all hours. I have done this all my life in different countries & places.

Except Nairobi. I felt so self-conscious there as a white person, and didn't have anyone to guide me around, I felt too weird to go out by myself even in day time (only there, for work meeting, for 2.5 days). If I had more time maybe I would have asked if a hotel staff person could take me for a stroll to local park for $10 . We dropped off a colleague (tall White lady) on a street corner in far flung suburb on way to airport, so I'm not saying all white people are at risk. But she knew the country & neighbourhood. I didn't.

I did used to as a uni student but never now.

I know someone who won't walk in the dark on her own and I think it's basically a totally different lifestyle - she drives everywhere and probably would anyway as she lives somewhere with limited public transport and doesn't like walking - if she goes out in the evening, it's either with friends and taxi home or with her DH.

It wouldn't work for me because I live in London and don't have a car but it actually doesn't feel that limiting to her.

I don't, my dh doesn't either. We are in London and tbh I think anyone can be a victim. So I would feel safer in a group, but my dh doesn't feel safer just because he's a man.

I didn't for years in my old area (urban) because I had a few unpleasant encounters which impacted my life for a long time.

I now live in a rural area in a different country and I will walk alone at night if I need to. I think the biggest problem around here are drunk drivers tbh, not random men. I regularly go running along a deserted canal towpath at 7 AM, it is pitch dark at this time of year, and unlit so I wear a headtorch. I have been told I shouldn't be doing this because 'you never know what could happen' but it makes me feel free, like I'm not afraid anymore.

I found you can't much compare abroad and UK sadly.

I do with a 5 stone huge dog. I don't think anyone would try anything she'd savage them lol

I do, it gets dark at 3pm here in the winter so its dark when I leave for work and dark when I come home. I couldn't afford to get taxis every day even if I wanted too and agree with pps I don't think its safer ive had worse experiences with dodgy taxi drivers than being approached when walking alone.

I don’t if I can help it. When I was 17 I was grabbed by a stranger walking home after the pubs shut. He’s been following me and I was making a dash for a phone box which had someone in it (long long time ago).

I managed to bite his hand and screamed. He called me a “fucking bitch” and casually walked away.

When I got home I wanted to call the police, but my mum wouldn’t, as I was only 17 and had been in the pub. She said she didn’t want to get in trouble. Looking back now, I can’t see how the police would have done anything to her. I suspect she just didn’t want the hassle.

I know women who don't but I do. I always have done. I think I'm more likely to get hit by a car but I wouldn't avoid crossing the road. Walking has always been a big part of my life and important to me, mentally and physically. Sometimes I'll walk at night. I stick to busy, lit streets wherever possible. So many things you do in life have a small risk of harm but I don't believe that means you should stop doing them. I don't know any woman that's been attacked by a random stranger at night but I do know many, many women who've been assaulted by people they know - dates, colleagues, friends of the family etc.

Yes if before midnight. After midnight I'd probably get a taxi.

I do on on occasion but live in a semi rural location so stick to lit areas as much as possible. My DD lives in London and regularly walks late at night after work or being out.

Yes - I regularly walk home from the railway station (35 minutes) after spending a day with family or friends. They always ask me to text them to let them know I've got home ok. I quite enjoy the walk . . . I choose to walk down residential roads, rather than past a large park, as it feels safer to me although it's a slightly longer walk. Also gives me the option of nipping into the Chinese takeaway for a bag of their wonderful chips, far nicer than the ones from my local fish and chip shop!!! I also walk home from church (45 minutes) but that's earlier in the evening. . . around 7.45-ish and Sundays tend to be a bit quieter with not so many people out and about.
I'm in my mid-sixties, live in a medium sized city and have never had any problems. I just choose my route carefully.

I do all the time, I even trot off to the garage at midnight sometimes (joys of skintness). Tbh even there on a fri/sat night is pretty dull, used to get a few colourful characters before the pandemic.

@Tomorrowisalatterday i guess maybe it depends where you live but like you, i'm city / suburbs based (and always have been) and I would never drive into the city centre for dinner or theatre etc because it's so much easier and cheaper to get the bus than it is to park.

I’m convinced there is a body of research to be done about society’s view on women and risk. The question in this thread falls into the trap any discussion of this subject does - that there is an objectively correct answer. E.g. women can walk home in the dark in a busy town up to 9:30, but thereafter only in ‘packs’.

What always seems to be missing is any idea that individual women might have different tolerances for risk and different thresholds for avoiding it. That - with some exceptions - adult women should be trusted to weigh up risk and their own comfort levels and come to decisions that may differ but are all worthy of respect. Op - do what is comfortable for you. There does not need to be a consensus around what women ‘should’ do.

I may be sensitive to this after yet another meeting at work when colleagues moaned that ‘as women’ they didn’t think it acceptable to be expected to travel to a foreign city for work and make their own way to a hotel (during the day). Speak for yourself!

I used to a lot when I was younger. The worst thing that happened while I was out on foot happened in broad daylight (man pulled over to ask directions and was naked from the waist down...). I would be more cautious now and wouldn't want my dd to be out alone in the dark. I don't like taxis either though - they make me feel very vulnerable - but I do live quite rurally, so have to be alone in a taxi down unlit country lanes, I would probably feel safer in a town/city.

Yes, happily. It really isn't a risky thing to do.

I am not really sure how you could avoid it totally unless you drive everywhere. I often walk home from the bus stop at night or nip to the shop on an evening. I can't imagine limiting my life to only going out in a car at night

I do but I'm always on edge and aware of my surroundings.

I was taught to pull to one one side and let them in front - ideally looking at them as they walk by so they know that they have been seen.

I try not to do it but there is still a walk at night sometimes to the carpark. Once in the car, it's a direct drive to my home. I think it's unavoidable.