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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Fiancés friend randomly made a comment about me wearing a crop top

10 replies

Rhaych2003 · 06/10/2022 22:55

I was minding my own business tidying up, my boyfriends friend was on loud speaker on the phone. We had uploaded a photo that day of us, I was wearing high waisted jeans with a crop top which didn’t show any of my lower stomach, just a little bit of skin between the top and pants.

My fiancés friend was telling him how he had noticed improvements of my partner since he’d started the gym, then he randomly said “why the fuck is your lass wearing that top? It’s stupid as fuck, be different if us men went out in crop tops”.. I was so shocked, my fiancé got angry and said “eh why are you saying that about my fiancé?” And ended the call. BARING IN MIND THIS FRIEND AND MY FIANCÉ HAVE PHOTOS OF THEM AT THE GYM TOPLESS??? So he walks around topless yet he slated me for it?

I entered the room and I was confused, like why has he randomly just slagged me off for what I was wearing? Baring in mind he brought the discussion up saying my boyfriend looked good on photo then made the comment about me.

My fiancé fell out with his friend for a few weeks (I told him on the day not to be silly and fall out even though I was mad). He missed hanging out with him so became friends with him again.

My fiancés friend claimed he didn’t mean anything bad by the comment, but I don’t appreciate getting judged for having the slightest bit of skin on show.

Should I forgive his friend and forget about it? I don’t mind my partner being friends with him obviously, but I can’t but feel a little bit crap.

I was a little confused as I’m sure he wouldn’t mind seeing a model in a crop top (I’m a petite girl but 4 months postpartum). Is it because I’m a mum? Or is it because he’s a bloody pig that judges women for how they dress?

OP posts:
Rhaych2003 · 06/10/2022 22:56

Apologies by the way for the slang and grammar, I wrote this in a hurry!

OP posts:
LubaLuca · 06/10/2022 22:57

He's probably just worried about the draught on your kidneys.

Rhaych2003 · 06/10/2022 22:59

Haha

OP posts:
Changer25 · 06/10/2022 22:59

Sounds like a stupid (but random) comment, god knows why he would even care. I’d move on

Cw112 · 06/10/2022 23:00

From what was said it sounds like he feels like he has he right to have a say in what his girlfriends wear and just assumed your partner would think the same way because he didn't see how problematic his attitude is. He sounds like a total ass and it's good that your partner called him out on it. I hope the mate is single. For ever.

Rhaych2003 · 06/10/2022 23:01

I think he may projecting some of his own insecurities as his ex used to wear quite flaunting outfits. The scary thing is he has 2 daughters, hate to see how he’d feel if someone shamed them.

OP posts:
OrlandointheWilderness · 06/10/2022 23:03

I reckon he is just a massive dick.

FabFitFifties · 06/10/2022 23:04

I couldn't give this so much head space - particularly as your DP challenged him. Move on. It's not like he's your friend.

Phrenologistsfinger · 06/10/2022 23:22

Are you teenagers?

Badgirlriri · 06/10/2022 23:26

I wouldn’t even be bothered by this.

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