I've been doing youth work for the past 2 years and I honestly hate it so much. I really thought I would enjoy it and I did at the start but I absolutely hate it now. I dread going in, every moment feels like an eternity.
I suppose I enjoy it when I actually get to have some good, meaningful chats with the kid one on one but that seldom happens. Tonight I was trying to speak to kids and it was like pulling teeth.
I ended up sitting for 2 hours cutting things out for the kids. There is not enough resources and everything there is is cheap shite. The two other youth workers take total charge and if I try and take charge they look at me as if I have two heads. They are definetely better at speaking to the kids in an 'authoritative' manner. Where I enjoy sitting down with the kids doing crafts and talking (when they actually talk back).
However, tonight the other two workers were filling out paperwork and I was left cleaning. I'm just over it.
I feel like a glorified babysitter. I have had many bad jobs but this is the worst. I try to go in with a positive attitude but I am always counting down the minutes till I can get home.
I struggle with the sound, the smells etc. I remember a colleague in the summer saying to me, 'we can't complain, it's easy money' and I remember thinking it's anything but easy money, I hate every second.
I really don't think my colleagues or most importantly the kids have an idea how I'm feeling. I smile, I chat, I encourage and I listen but I am struggling so much. Every day is a challenge to not phone off sick.