To say I’m unwell so can’t go to a birthday

[alwayscake]

I’m on maternity leave and things are very tight now I’ve dropped to statutory pay. My good friend on my birthday came out with me for drinks and a meal so I feel I have to do the same for her.

A surprise meal has been arranged by her best friend and I’m also supposed to go out drinking with her on her actual birthday. This is a few days apart. I can’t choose one I can’t afford to do either.

I’ve had to pay out for things for my baby and it’s left me with nothing. Im struggling with my credit card and i really can’t afford to put anymore on so I’m feeling sick with guilt about not going but also if I do go I’m worried about the financial pressure I’ll be putting on myself.

I was considering saying I’m unwell. AIBU?

[LadyKenya]

@alwayscake

I’m going to just be honest. Thanks everyone. Times are so tough :(

And that is precisely the reason that you should be honest with her. She will/ should be aware that lots of people are struggling financially right now.

[Samarie123]

YABU to lie. Just tell the truth.

[GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing]

Tell her the truth. It’s better than lying and can’t be “got around”.

Suggest something you can do that doesn’t cost money so she knows that you care - a walk or her coming over one day.

[Mariposista]

Don’t lie. Invite her for coffee and cake at tours or go to hers to celebrate. If she is a good friend she will understand that times are hard and won’t want you getting into debt.