Is he sending a sign or am I over thinking

[BrokenRainbow22]

Its late, my mind is working in over time... AGAIN.
If you haven't read pp my partner of 11 years walked out and left me 6 weeks ago now because I saw my friend in the doctors. Hes very insecure and controlling, accused me of talking about him to her next day packed up and left.
I haven't really seen him since, he had the DC on 2 ocassions then my car mysteriously disappeared so I stopped taking them to the meeting point and thought if he wants to take them out he would collect from the house. He didn't, instead he sent a letter saying he would rather have nothing than ever have me back in his life. I haven't seen him for 4 weeks until Friday. It was our sons birthday and he just turned up, didn't say A word to me at all, said to our son 'daddy has your presents' put them in the hallways and off he went. That was it, anyway in his birthday card he wrote 'daddy wishes things were different' and also had about 300 photographs printed off all of his old mobiles and popped them in too. The photos were mixed, some of the DC, some of me and him and some of all of us.
Why would he not keep the photos of him and the DC for himself if he doesn't want anything to do with me? Is he trying to get to me? Does he want me back? Is he playing mind games?

Sorry I'm just so so lonely and missing him so much I'm hoping for him to come back and I have since my very first post on here. P.s sorry if I don't make any sense I'm very emotional right now, my head is all over the place.

Definitely overthinking. He assumed you were talking about him because you happened to bump into a friend? He sounds like a controlling, abusive arsehole and even if he is sending a message with these photos is just to control you even more. Run before he has the chance to influence your DC at all / even more. Good men do not behave like this.

Definitely over thinking this. Your introduction of him was that he was insecure and controlling'. He is still trying control you. He wanted to leave, and used the flimsiest reason as a weal excuse. Please don't take him back. As the poster above says, Good men do not behave like this.

Can you arrange for a friend or family member to come over or stay for a bit of a hand hold whilst you get through this.

He’s using your child to emotionally blackmail you.

“daddy wishes things were different”

well, daddy needs to stop being a c4nt

He is not sending you a sign. You would not be better off with him back in your life and nor will your children be. Please get someone in real life to talk to about how to move on safely and embrace your new healthier home.

He sounds like a psychopath. Did you get your car back?

The sign says “nasty, manipulative, controlling, abusive, cruel man”. Please get some help, and when you’ve got over this I hope you find a good man to be your partner in the future.

The only sign he’s sending is that if you allow him he will completely fuck you over for the rest of your life. - he’s not going to be a loving happy husband ever! Create the life you want and work towards that without him. He cannot dictate what you do with your life.

Why would he not keep the photos of him and the DC for himself if he doesn't want anything to do with me? Is he trying to get to me? Does he want me back? Is he playing mind games?

Most likely explanation is that he wanted the children to have pictures of him and of him and them together because he won't be around. He may have made copies for himself, or if not he still has the digital versions. Nothing to do with you, I don't think.

... he sent a letter saying he would rather have nothing than ever have me back in his life. He's a prick. Children are not possessions that he can decide to give up, like a television or a car or a piece of furniture the two of you may have shared. They're his responsibility as much as yours. You're definitely better off without him and they might be too, but make sure he's at least contributing his share financially if you're going to have sole custody.

He’s giving you a massive sign and it’s telling you he’s a controlling cunt. Pure nasty to just remove himself from your child’s life just to spite you. I hope that even if you don’t realise you deserve better that your children do. So cruel.

Thank you for your opinions. Definatley over thought it. He doesn't contribute financially or emotionally to the children, its the same every time he leaves.

Every time he leaves?

Why do you keep having him back? He sounds like a massive asshole. You know it won't be doing your kids any good to having him come and go like this right? You'll be far better off staying apart.

Why TAF would you keep subjecting your kids to that turmoil? Wave bye bye and do the Freedom Programme.

it's the same every time he leaves
Every time?? What the hell?? He's fucking with you, leave him.
Also, where is your car? Did he take it? Did you report it stolen? I'm very confused about that.

He's the only relationship I have ever known and I do genuinely love him.

The car was stolen from outside my friends house about 3 weeks ago. No I haven't had it back yet and yes I reported it as stolen, the police haven't found it so now im just waiting for my insurance to pay out so I can buy another car.

He's a nasty fucker, if you take him back you are opening your children up to a world of hurt. Your poor DS, imagine having your father write that in your birthday card

@Blocked luckily he cannot read properly yet because I thought the same. I wish things were also different but I wouldn't write that and put it onto our children.
I know he is toxic and no good I know it all but my heart doesn't want to accept it.