I FUCKING hate my life

[upsetandfedupandmiserable]

If anyone can read this and has any advice I would be so so grateful

I’ve posted before but posting again with some updates in case anyone else is in a similar position

i have ibs and it’s fucking shit and I feel so, so alone with it. Nobody can fucking help. The GP (who is actually really helpful) can’t help and none of the medication they can prescribe makes a difference at all. Ive tried everything they can prescribe. They said they can’t do anything else for me apart from refer me to the gastro department at the hospital. Ive been there a few times, had a sigmoidoscopy (I was told it was to be a colonoscopy and only found out in the follow up letter it was a sigmoidoscopy) and have had countless blood tests and stool tests. All normal. The department at the hospital weren’t keen to even do the tests at all as they said it was obviously just IBS but my GP had referred me so many times that they said they would do it. Since everything was normal, they’ve discharged me and if my GP refers me again it gets rejected as ‘it’s just IBS and should be managed in the community’ they said there’s nothing else they can do. And the GP said there’s nothing they can do. I seriously don’t know what the fuck to do but I’m miserable with my life and it feels like nobody can help

lve already seen a dietician- they did fodmap and tried to find foods I was intolerant to and nothing made a difference so they discharged me and said it was beyond them and it didn’t work

it feels like everyone is saying it’s beyond them and nobody can actually help. This isn’t what my 20s are supposed to be like. I haven’t told any of my friends or family because I prefer to keep it private but it’s humiliating and the symptoms are awful.

-diarroeha (15+ times a day sometimes)
-cramps, sort of like contractions/ sickness cramps
-mucusy poo, sometimes it looks like I’ve blown my nose in it and it’s so gunky
-greasy stools, TMI but there’s always a filmy layer on the toilet water as if it’s like oil or something, it looks like an oil slick on a puddle
-awful wind
-bloating
-really, really noisy stomach
-extremely painful poos, as if it’s acidic or something. It seriously feels like I’m shitting battery acid and the burning is horrific (I don’t have piles or fissures and have been checked multiple times for them)

right now it’s really bad. I’ve had horrific wind, greasy bowel motions (not diarrhoea) and a horrible on/off sharp pain. Its felt like a stitch and gets worse when im walking. It’s either in the middle of my abdomen or to the side and not always in the same place. It comes and goes and I think it might be wind related. I’ve had it before when the IBS gets bad and it leaves me doubled over sometimes. I don’t know what’s worse though the pain or the contraction cramps

I went out for dinner with my friends last week- big mistake and even though I had something bland which I’ve had before without causing a flare up, this time it sent my IBS absolutely insane and I was pretty much on the toilet all night and all of the day after. I think that’s why I still feel shit right now

i had an episode of black poo (6 times within 24 hours) recently, it was like sticky tar and I went to the hospital for it as I was worried. My blood test came back that my red blood cells were low and the nurses seemed a bit worried and said I should stay to speak to consultant. When he came he basically said he didn’t know why I was there and it was just IBS and anaemia is common in young menstruating females, but I pointed out that I wasn’t on my period and I’ve never had anaemia before. He did an endoscopy and ultrasound but obviously wasn’t happy with it. It was all clear and I never found out why the poo was black. ive had gallstones ruled out with an ultrasound

I think they think I’m looking for some other answer other than IBS but I’m not. I believe them that it is IBS. But they said I need to learn to manage it. But how? Nothing helps. I’m having diarrhoea 15+ times a day and it’s burning so badly it hurts me to sit down. My life revolves around where the nearest toilet is. I’ve tried fodmap. I’ve tried eliminating every food group. I’ve tried probiotics. NOTHING helps

I hate my life so much and I feel so, so alone with it all. I don’t know why I’m even posting I’m just upset about it all and it’s so fucking unfair

Sorry for swearing I’m just so upset. And sorry for all the detail and for clarification I’m not a troll and MNHQ can verify this. Im a regular poster who is just so miserable and fed up

I should have also mentioned im exhausted all the time. Like all the time. I got 9 hours of sleep last night and was falling asleep before dinner. I think that’s just the stress of the ibs flaring up over the last few days but i feel like I’ve been run over by a bus 10 times

This sounds so awful OP. I have no idea what to suggest but hopefully a reply will bump your post. Really hope someone on here can relate and help.

Sorry, it sounds shxt. I have no solutions but much sympathy. It’s clearly having a massive impact on your quality of life.

Sorry to hear about your issues. It sounds really debilitating.

Have you been checked for coeliac disease or Crohns / Ulcerative colitis?

So sorry to read this , when did all this start ?

This sounds horrendous, no wonder you’re so fed up! My mum has colitis and some of your symptoms sound like hers. Could you afford the cost of an initial consultation with a specialist?

Crohns

I’m so sorry you are suffering. It’s sounds really debilitating and painful. I used to suffer with IBS in my 20s and turned a corner with it taking a constitutional homeopathic remedy. I also got into yoga and meditation. I know a lot of people slate alternative medicine, but it helped me. Good luck and keep seeking

Oh dear OP, I've read your other threads and know how much you're suffering. You got lots of great support on those many threads, did any of it help? Did you get any answers?

I didn’t want to read and run. I feel very sorry for you. This sounds horrific. Could the stress of it also be contributing to it?
Have you tried seeing an IBS specialist privately?

Have you been checked for Bile Acid Malabsorption? It's often misdiagnosed as IBS.

I sympathise OP, I also have IBS but nowhere near as bad as yours. Diarrhoea 15 times a day is in no way normal - sounds like something is seriously wrong. Could you afford to go privately to get a full check up?

Oh this sounds terrible - no wonder you feel like you do. I dont really know what else to say except hope you can get better medical treatment.

Oh love. I had a pretty similar time to you in my 20s with lots of exploration and an eventual diagnosis of ibs. I still really still have to be careful with my diet with no alcohol, 2 fibrogel daily and 2 litres of water a day now 15 years later it's mostly alright with just a bad episode maybe twice a year. I hope things get better for you

This sounds absolutely awful OP. I really feel for you.

I have IBS but nowhere near to this extent. Something that really helps me is a peppermint tea after meals and Hugh fibre foods. If I'm going through a bout of diarrhea I take loperamide or imodium.

Are you using any hormonal contraception. I used to suffer like this and eventually it was put down to a hormone imbalance. I got that sorted and am now totally fine. I really hope you find your answer soon.

It seems incredible in this day and age that you are just supposed to “live with it” and nobody can actually help. No answers just a lot of sympathy, sounds like a horrible way to live.

The tarry stools suggest there was bleeding somewhere in your GI tract.

Have you had liver bloods done? I only say this because I had some liver issues and oily stools were one of the symptoms. Also bloating, diarrhea, wind etc. And because of what appeared to be bleeding in your GI tract. I really feel that should have been taken more seriously.

I am so sorry for you, OP - no wonder you’re feeling so down.

I was misdiagnosed with IBS for years and eventually worked out that I was intolerant to rapeseed oil. It is in EVERYTHING - including almond milk! - and particularly hard to avoid when eating out. It can be avoided though - I check labels religiously and have managed to find specific brands for particularly problematic foods (e.g. Hovis Sliced White Bread, Waitrose Essentials Salad Cream and Hellmann’s Organic Mayo, Kettle Chips) and it has helped enormously.

It could be worth trying to exclude rapeseed oil and seeing how you get on? Lots of people are misdiagnosed with IBS as the intolerance isn’t well documented - it’s only become noticeable in recent years as so many companies switch from sunflower oil to (cheaper) rapeseed oil. You will need to check packets extra carefully at the moment as the war in Ukraine has meant that many companies have faced a shortage of sunflower oil and have had to switch to rapeseed. If you check the barcode, it’s usually printed there (e.g. McCain Home Fries have a picture of a sunflower on the back and the ingredients state that they contain sunflower oil, yet the “after manufacture” print above the barcode says “contains Rapeseed”).

Good luck and I hope you find some relief soon xx

All of this. IBS used to be, no idea now, a diagnosis of exclusion. If you didn't have other things, you got told you had IBS.

I don't think they've ruled out enough.

FODMAP and more recently low carbing with peppermint sorts me out. Yours sounds horrendous.

And of course, this should be tried IN ADDITION to pressing for medical tests etc (not instead of). Worth a try but definitely important to speak to your GP again in case there is anything more serious.

I’m not a medic but sharing my experience in case it helps 🙂

What colour are you stools? I had sinilar symptoms with a diseased gallbladder but also had attacks, had it removed

Has bile acid malabsorption been ruled out? Your symptoms sound like a close match.
gutscharity.org.uk/advice-and-information/conditions/bile-acid-malabsorption/

It's really frustrating to just be fobbed off with the (all too common) IBS diagnosis. GPs don't seem to remember that IBS is a symptom, not a condition. My dp was fobbed off with the IBS diagnosis from the GP for several years. Even had a colonoscopy that came back as all normal, but six months later deteriorated to being so, so ill that I insisted we call 111. They said to come straight in to a&e. Was quickly diagnosed with ulcerative colitis that was so severe that immediate full colectomy was required. If there's any sign of blood, then don't allow them to fob you off with IBS.

Greasy film in the loo suggests a fat malabsorption issue or as someone else suggested, bile acid malabsorption. Have you been tested for exocrine pancreatic insufficiency, which can also be related to coeliac disease? Can you ask for a referral to a different hospital for a second opinion? And it might be worth looking up the Bristol stool chart so you can provide a medical description of what is happening.

My mum was just like this. Turned out to be Diverticulitis