Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

OMG the moaning and groaning! (Bit light-hearted)

26 replies

Dogscanteatonions · 03/10/2022 21:17

DP is ill, he has tonsillitis. Started yesterday however he was well enough to manage a two course Sunday lunch and two pints.

This morning he was worse so he immediately got a GPs appointment after telling them he is at death's door and now has medication.

I KNOW he's ill and I'm doing my best to be sympathetic and nursing him but OMFG the constant moaning and groaning, it's like he's undergoing torture on to the rack or having his fingernails removed! Every time he swallows we have a full body spasm and shrieks.

I've been through all manner of illness and surgery and never been anything like this.

I'm trying so hard but my god, I'm having to post here just to vent so I don't lose the fucking plot. No chance of much sleep for me tonight as I think I'm in for this all night.

Love him to bits but currently got very gritted teeth! AIBU to think all this moaning isn't fucking helping?

Oh btw he doesn't have a dressing gown so we have the Loungers of Lament.

Shit - is the moaning because he doesn't have the dressing gown of Doom???

OP posts:
Original poster
Dogscanteatonions · 03/10/2022 21:19

He's a drama queen with any illness to be honest and a hypochondriac but outdoing himself now.

OP posts:
BackOnTheBandWagon · 03/10/2022 21:40

Oh these are my favourite threads. Love everyone piling in with the tales of men so frail they couldn't possibly make a slice of toast when they're "under the weather".

My DH is one of those. I had a text yesterday when I was on the driveway with DS napping in the car: "I've crawled upstairs to bed as my stomach is feeling awful".

Turns out he was hungry and it had just been too many hours since he'd eaten (and too many beers the night before). Asked if I'd brought home a sandwich for him. I had. I know the drill by now Hmm

Unanananana · 03/10/2022 21:46

Send him to bed. Couldn't stand all the performance groaning and shuffling. Its not endearing, its fanny-drying.

Original poster
Dogscanteatonions · 03/10/2022 21:52

He won't go to bed as he 'feels panicky' about going to bed alone. It's like he thinks he's going to die of tonsillitis alone. I think he's worried I won't hear how ill he is if he's in bed

OP posts:
Original poster
Dogscanteatonions · 03/10/2022 21:55

BackOnTheBandWagon · 03/10/2022 21:40

Oh these are my favourite threads. Love everyone piling in with the tales of men so frail they couldn't possibly make a slice of toast when they're "under the weather".

My DH is one of those. I had a text yesterday when I was on the driveway with DS napping in the car: "I've crawled upstairs to bed as my stomach is feeling awful".

Turns out he was hungry and it had just been too many hours since he'd eaten (and too many beers the night before). Asked if I'd brought home a sandwich for him. I had. I know the drill by now Hmm

Oh mine gets lightheaded and dizzy of he hasn't eaten. Obviously this is a serious symptom of something until I suggest he eats something

OP posts:
Unanananana · 03/10/2022 21:55

Lordy. I know this is meant to be lighthearted but he sounds pretty pathetic. He wants you to witness his performance. How attractive.

SunshineClouds1 · 03/10/2022 21:57

Dogscanteatonions · 03/10/2022 21:52

He won't go to bed as he 'feels panicky' about going to bed alone. It's like he thinks he's going to die of tonsillitis alone. I think he's worried I won't hear how ill he is if he's in bed

😂😂

JenniferAllisonPhillipaSue · 03/10/2022 22:00

I've come to the conclusion that men externalise groans when under the weather because doing so makes them feel better; whereas women don't feel that need to 'share their pain'. I can think of no other reason why DH has to keep groaning, it must help him somehow. It certainly doesn't get any reaction or special treatment from me!

Fairislefandango · 03/10/2022 22:00

How utterly pathetic.

comfortablyfrumpy · 03/10/2022 22:07

Can you don some noise cancelling headphones? 😂

NeverDropYourMooncup · 03/10/2022 22:08

In fairness, I had 'viral tonsillitis' once where I cried every time I breathed and thought I was going to suffocate in my sleep.

Turned out I had a quinsy. The infection was busy tunnelling into my palate and tissues of my neck by the time I was having a tonsillectomy I nearly didn't wake up from.

I've had broken bones, surgery, relocated dislocations that caused permanent damage without pain relief, ruptured tendons, a dental abscess, given birth (and had a rather dramatic section where they didn't realise the epidural hadn't taken until they were separating my stomach muscles) - nothing was as painful as that.

WhileMyGuitarGentlyWeeps · 03/10/2022 22:08

I am on the fence here. I know men are proper whiny when they're 'ill,' and just LOVE to constantly let you know how bad they are - and how much worse they are than you. BUT... tonsillitis is vile. Really does make you feel sooooo ill. So I do think your DH may genuinely be suffering.

Simonjt · 03/10/2022 22:12

When I was like this with tonsillitis I actually had sepsis, it was more painful from broken bones I’ve had and worse than a ruptured appendix. Tonsils are genuinely the devils work.

WhisperingWalter · 03/10/2022 22:12

Dogscanteatonions · 03/10/2022 21:52

He won't go to bed as he 'feels panicky' about going to bed alone. It's like he thinks he's going to die of tonsillitis alone. I think he's worried I won't hear how ill he is if he's in bed

😂 Bless his heart, I do feel for him as I always had tonsillitis and when I got it really bad I genuinely thought I was going to die as I couldn’t breathe 🙈 but I survived and so will he.

unsync · 03/10/2022 22:16

To be fair, tonsillitis does make swallowing difficult and is very painful. It does sound like he's overdoing it a bit though. A good test would be to suggest he gets them removed. If he's really in agony, he'll agree to it. 😁

Georgeskitchen · 03/10/2022 22:17

This is my DP to a T. He has a "ringing in sick" voice when calling work. He stutters weakly, adding a few coughs for effect. Manages to gasp out that he can't come to work. Ends the call and his voice returns to normal. He then staggers slowly upstairs to bed and stays there for days 🤬🤬

Badger1970 · 03/10/2022 22:21

Give him some co-codamol or night nurse.

And wait for him to fall asleep before you start digging the patio up ready...

DH had a minor heart procedure earlier this year and I honestly nearly killed him after a week of the "oohing and ahhhing" every time he moved. The leaflet said he could go back to work 2 days later but oh no, that was clearly written by someone who hadn't had it done Hmm

bluebellmay2020 · 03/10/2022 22:37

Be thankful it isn't man flu - that's the absolute worst illness known (to man).

Brigante9 · 03/10/2022 22:45

I’d kill him, sorry. I would have very little patience, having been through an awful lot myself.

supersop60 · 03/10/2022 22:50

My DP has a comedy 'blocked nose' voice. I imitate him and he stops. Lots of moans and groans for all sorts of things, however.

echt · 03/10/2022 22:53

Years ago, having been put in bed for four days with tonsillitis, in such pain, unable to eat anything, and near quinsy by the end, I was initially sympathetic to your DH. But if he can manage that food and drink, he can stop the moaning.

Rosewaterblossom · 03/10/2022 23:02

Tonsillitis is one of those things which can seem okish one day, as in you're eating fine just with some pain swallowing, to the next day feeling like you're swallowing razors! I've just spent all weekend in bed in agony with strep throat/Tonsillitis, I slept for more or less 2 days my body just gave up. However, I got some antibiotics and within 12 hours I feel OK with a mild sore throat!

So in some ways I do feel for your dh and it's horrible when you're in lots of pain like that with an unsympathetic partner (my ex dh was Mr unsympathetic.)

Stoptheworld1000 · 03/10/2022 23:07

Unanananana · 03/10/2022 21:46

Send him to bed. Couldn't stand all the performance groaning and shuffling. Its not endearing, its fanny-drying.

Best quote ever! 🤣

2018SoFarSoGreat · 03/10/2022 23:10

'dressing gown of doom' comes to mind.

Seriously, what if they had to have periods or childbirth? Even my lovely DH agrees he'd just put his head in the oven if that were the case.

Sympathies, OP. Big sympathies.

slackademic · 03/10/2022 23:35

Go along with it, tell him you are really getting concerned and order a taxi to take him to A&E where he can wait for 10hrs on his own.