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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to miss living in London?

129 replies

Youngatheart00 · 02/10/2022 21:44

Moved out of london 18 months ago to where I’m from originally - however I lived in london post study and for around 15 years. Rented in the glamorous areas and bought in a not so glam area. Now live in a lovely place but it’s very much not london and I miss it. Whenever I’m there for work i pine for it - even the smell of the underground stations (I know!!)

How do others feel?

YABU - get over it
YANBU - london is the best / I miss it too

OP posts:
EmmaH2022 · 02/10/2022 23:32

The person with a home in the Square Mile and a home in the country - that I could do. I am in a rough part of Zone 4 that used to be okay.

that said, I don't have any experience of living so central. What's that like?

I appreciate if I lived in Hampstead and took cabs everywhere, I'd still love it. It used to be driveable, I miss those days.

alsonotmyname · 02/10/2022 23:32

Yes I miss it and love visiting, we could not afford to buy there and so moved away but hope to go back when the dc have grown

Salome61 · 02/10/2022 23:33

I really miss London too, but we moved to the NE and I haven't got enough money to get back. The smell of the tube, nothing like it!

floorida · 02/10/2022 23:40

I'm a born & raised Londoner so don't know any different. However I think living in Z1 is another world & must be amazing. I do hate the traffic & pollution though.

ChilliPB · 02/10/2022 23:44

Reading this thread it feels like people see the UK as London or small towns with nothing going on where everything closes at 5pm. Looking at you @YukoandHiro @Thepeopleversuswork @EnidSpyton 😆

I left London for Edinburgh. There’s certainly no small town mentality, there’s lots to do, drinks, food, culture… it’s obviously not as big as London, but London is so big most people aren’t actually making the most of it (I can’t be the only one who’d often see a new bar or whatever was opening only to realise it was an hour away on public transport…) A lot of Londoners stay in their area most of the time anyway. I swapped a Zone 2/3 flat for a central flat, I can walk into town in 15 minutes. It’s friendlier, cleaner and safer than London. And I can drive out of the city to the beach, or the hills in less time than it would take to drive across my borough in London.

YANBU to miss London @Youngatheart00 though. Where are you? For me, moving to an outer suburb, or a commuter town wasn’t going to work. It often feels like those places are too much of a compromise and you’re not getting the best of anything (still expensive, not always lots of stuff to do nearby). Could you look at other cities instead?

Vintagevixen · 02/10/2022 23:50

I was born and raised in London and the majority of my life has played out there. I was forced to move out because of finances post divorce but miss it terribly. Where I live now is a lovely town and has been good to me, but it will never be home. All my family still live there. So much buzz and energy.

Miss everything about it even the smell, dirt and pollution. Even miss the central line and I spent years moaning about going to work on it! I would move back tomorrow if I could. Maybe in the future when DD has grown up and I get some inheritance I hope I might get back there - would be so happy to downsize for London.

Only London is home for me.

DirtyOldTowns · 02/10/2022 23:55

It can be very quiet living in Central London. People are amazed. The high buildings seem to block out noise (and you never really get a true sense of the weather).

I love it. Young and old- much less middle aged neighbours. Not many children,

Iconic architecture/sculpture on the morning dog walk.

PinkPrettyAndPointed · 02/10/2022 23:59

Bit different as I left the UK but I didn't realise until I left London how much the hustle and bustle of the city gave me low level anxiety.

We lived in London for 10 years and now I live on the very outskirts of another big city but I'm closer to the countryside than city and I really want to go further out.

The dirtiness and pollution of London is not for me anymore, I'm happy to say!

kissmelittleass · 03/10/2022 00:06

YANBU I yearn for London I miss it so much
I was there in the summer and I loved being home I felt so content, the buzz of the tubes, the London buses, the black cabs, even the police sirens I miss it all, happy I know my way about and the general buzz of London.
Happy when I'm in London and sad I ever left, I did what I thought was best at the time with high crime rates I thought I d be better off bringing up my baby and future children in a quiet area well away from London and whilst in my heart I know I did it for my children along with the fact I couldn't afford to buy a property in London I do feel a kind of grief that I left I really do.
London is where my heart is

EmmaH2022 · 03/10/2022 00:37

DirtyOldTowns · 02/10/2022 23:55

It can be very quiet living in Central London. People are amazed. The high buildings seem to block out noise (and you never really get a true sense of the weather).

I love it. Young and old- much less middle aged neighbours. Not many children,

Iconic architecture/sculpture on the morning dog walk.

Yes, when I walk round Southwark, or Pimlico, i'm struck by the peace.

also the area round the Guildhall Gallery.

hotsauce3 · 03/10/2022 04:55

Pineappleflowers · 02/10/2022 22:39

Hm. I’m from London and I fled as soon as I could - for me, in my early thirties. I’m overjoyed to be rural and you couldn’t pay me to move back.

The stink, the tiny accommodation, the filth, the crime, the constant turnover of people, the lack of community, the cost of everything, the traffic jams, the constant background noise…

YABU 😬

I honestly don’t get it when people talk about a lack of community in London. I live on the outskirts of zone two and our street is so friendly. We’re good friends with our immediate neighbours (regularly having drinks at each other’s houses, cat-sitting for each other etc) and know lots more by name and to say good morning to. We have a WhatsApp group for the street that was created during the pandemic and is still very active. People look out for elderly members of the community and a neighbouring road had a street party for the platinum jubilee that was really well attended by young and old. In my area generally there are loads of groups for mums and babies that are great for meeting fellow parents too. In my experience London has a great sense of community!

HowVeryBizarre · 03/10/2022 05:38

I never liked living in London but can totally understand why others love the place. Sydney on the other hand I will only leave in my coffin 😁

Sally99 · 03/10/2022 05:43

I miss the ease of living in London. Shops on your doorstep and cycling to work etc. Everything is such a struggle in the country and I spend so much time in the car.

OldWivesTale · 03/10/2022 05:51

I don't live in London but I can remember the smell of the tube; it's got an oily undertone to it, mixed with the smell of heat; it's hard to explain but it is quite distinctive (got the PP who wanted a description of the smell)

OldWivesTale · 03/10/2022 05:51
  • for the PP
Imissmoominmama · 03/10/2022 05:56

Sally99 · 03/10/2022 05:43

I miss the ease of living in London. Shops on your doorstep and cycling to work etc. Everything is such a struggle in the country and I spend so much time in the car.

I live in a small market town. I shop on our high street and cycle to work, and there are nice cafes. If I want the theatre, there are four on the bus routes from our town. Perhaps I’m content because all of the other stuff isn’t right there in my eyesight all the time. I suspect, if it was, I’d want to try it all.

britsabroad · 03/10/2022 06:12

I lived in London for 10 years, loved it but as soon as I became pregnant I left. I've not missed it all and every time I go back I hate it. Its just not safe anywhere. We were in zone 2 in a supposedly nice area and recently my neighbour was a witness in a murder trial that happened 5 mins from where we used to live. I don't want my son growing up around that.
Also found the pollution bad. So I have no regrets about leaving. But everyone is different, if you love it and want to go back, then do it!

mdh2020 · 03/10/2022 06:17

We have the best of both worlds as we live on the outer edge of zone 4. Lots of greenery and good schools and 12 minutes into Kings Cross by train. I can’t imagine ever leaving London.

HappyKoala56 · 03/10/2022 06:22

I'm obviously in the minority here - lived there all my life until 6 years ago and you couldn't pay me to move back. We stayed there for a night a few months ago and took time out to go for a walk, was absolutely awful. I could feel my lungs filling up with pollution, I didn't feel safe, it was so noisy and everyone looked miserable. Not one person acknowledged me during that walk or said good morning. I couldn't wait to get back to what is now home, it's far more 'me' and I could feel my anxiety levels completely subside while pulling into our station.

Pufferpuffin · 03/10/2022 06:24

Ah, we left a couple of months ago after 20 + years and I miss it everyday. Oddly I even have little pangs for the rubbish on the streets of our somewhat gritty part of east London, the dumper mattresses. And of course the sheer diversity of life and stuff always going on. But I’m enjoying where we live now too and looking forward to going back to London as a visitor.

NOTANUM · 03/10/2022 06:31

YNBU
I started very centrally and moved out to the outer zones for a bit of peace when the kids came. Within minutes of my house is excellent transport, long green walks and parks, nice restaurants and shops. My street is so lovely and there’s a great sense of community
Newcomers always welcome too.
Love London.

Autumnisclose · 03/10/2022 06:35

Have you made a oros and cons list between London and where you are now based on what you need now? I suspect alot of people who move out are really reminiscing about London as it was when they were young, free and single.

We llve in zone 4. You couldn't pay me to live in central London and I barely go up there. Where we live could be anywhere. It's quiet, close to loads of greenery but has big red London buses going through the high street. I like knowing I can be in central London in 25 mins The teens love it, it's their playground..

Darbs76 · 03/10/2022 06:37

Before the pandemic I announced to friends and family back home (250 miles away) id be moving back in a few years. Since covid and now my kids don’t need babysitters I’ve been enjoying everything london has to offer - theatre, museums, shopping, restaurants and after spending 2wks back home in the summer I don’t think I can move back.

I’m on the outskirts of london but can be there in 30 mins. So we have country here too, best of both worlds. Don’t think I can move

Autumnisclose · 03/10/2022 06:39

My sister lives in Dorset. I love the open roads where I don't see cars for miles, the slower pace and less people. Even where we live in zone 4 which has a frenetic pace which causes a constant low level anxiety. We go to Devon every year and I notice how I calm down within days. I have the same conversation with myself every year and start searching Zoopla for a house. Then return to London and think, perhaps not. There's part of me that needs that pace , even in zone 4 its there. I find zone 1 total overload though.

QuietNeighbour · 03/10/2022 06:40

Grew up in and still live in zone 1. I would find it hard to give up the culture but I desperately crave quiet, clean, green. I think if not London it would have to be abroad but I don’t know where. I’ll stay put till something drives or pulls me out.

when I get frustrated with it here a walk along the river always soothes my soul.

the tube I avoid but the smell is metal dust and engine grease