To think that men can compliment a woman without fancying her?

[Screenburn]

…just that, really.

My boss’ boss says really nice things about me all the time - both to my face and to others when I’m not there. I am quitting my job soon and would like to keep up the professional relationship but I’d be less keen if he fancied me…which I don’t think he does, but some colleagues do!

AIBU to think he can be nice to me and mean it without there being some kind of dodgy element?

I see nothing wrong with a male boss or colleague complimenting me on a new coat or pair of shoes though.

Haven't voted as you are asking 2 different questions.

So "AIBU to think that men can compliment a woman without fancying her"
Of course YANBU. I would also include compliments on a new haircut in that. Same (as a pp said) that I, as a woman can (and do) compliment men without fancying them. It is nice to be nice to people.

Whether you should "keep up the professional relationship" is a different question. When I have moved jobs I have only ever stayed in touch with friends. So, to me it sounds strange. However, I understand it might be different in different industries ?

I do know that one of my colleagues is jealous of what he says about me, because she told me so. I feel bad for her because she is just as skilled as me, it’s just that we have different skills.

Maybe it is strange? I don’t know. In my industry it’s common to keep in touch with colleagues you’ve got on with, in order to talk shop and share ideas over a coffee or dinner.

sort of like a business friendship, if you like. That’s what I’d be looking for.

How many other employees, seems so odd to me that he singles you out for enthusiastic praise and no one else. Surely if it is a management strategy he would find things to praise everyone about occasionally. Unless of course you are absolute heads and shoulders above everyone else. Feels off to me but doesn't mean you can't stay in touch just be aware .

There are five of us in my team, and about 20 in our department.

I am really good at one thing our team does (probably quite a bit better than the others) but colleagues are just as good at other things that I’m not.

I just don’t know what to think now!

I compliment women. I don't fancy them...or maybe I am in denial? 🤔 😄
Why do women make everything so complicated and stressful for ourselves by turning every word spoken to us inside out?

Is it wrong that I'd like both of these compliments?

I don’t see what the problem is with anyone fancying anyone else. If doesn’t mean anyone wants anything to happen, you just find the person attractive. That doesn’t turn off just because you’re in a relationship. You just don’t act on it

I’ve had male colleagues say things like “oh.. nice new hairdo”, “looking very glam today” and “oh, I like your coat”. Never taken it as they fancied me