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AIBU?

Expecting EOW dad to deal with headlice.

9 replies

Hoverfly1 · 02/10/2022 12:17

Another parent of kids that my 3 dc spend a lot of time with messaged me on Friday to tell her kids have headlice. I was at work and my kids dad had just picked them up from school to spend the weekend with him. I messaged him straight away to let him know he would need to check them, especially as he could potentially treat them before the kids had slept at his house so would be no need to worry about eggs etc.

I didn’t hear back from him on Friday so I messaged him on Saturday to ask if they had them or not as I would probably need to treat myself before they came back if they did to prevent any possible re infestation ( 🤢)

He eventually sent me text saying he hadn’t checked but he would do it that day.

I still haven’t heard back from him and I just know he is going to bring them back home at bedtime tonight needing to be treated (2 girls with long thick hair so it will take hours). I haven’t found any on myself but I also have long thick hair so it's difficult to check on myself so there might be some hiding there that I haven’t found! I would really need to check the kids to confirm if we need treated or not.

AIBU to expect him to deal with this on his weekend with them? He only had them eow, (his choice) and he will only do fun day out type stuff with them.I imagine he just doesn’t think he should have to deal with this as he isn’t the resident parent. I have sent him a message this morning asking that he either lets me know that he has dealt with it or he brings them home asap so that I can deal with it this afternoon but he is still ignoring my messages!

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Am I being unreasonable?

23 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
9%
You are NOT being unreasonable
91%
girlmom21 · 02/10/2022 12:20

IMO it's neglectful not to check them and treat them if needed

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Ponoka7 · 02/10/2022 12:21

He's enjoying the power. Unfortunately you can't force him to do either. You're best just sitting it out.

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DragonMovie · 02/10/2022 12:21

YANBU at all. They’re his kids - sometimes health interrupts a fun day out. If you left them with lice the almost 2 weeks you have them on the vague assumption your ex would sort it in his weekend you’d be accused of neglect and rightly so. He needs to do his bit. They’ll need treatment and a lot of combing.

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errnerrcallnernnernnern · 02/10/2022 12:21

YANBU. Call him and tell him he needs to treat them now,

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Fuuuuuckit · 02/10/2022 12:22

My ex didn't treat the dc when he had them for a week. Came home crawling with lice, a day before we were due to go on holiday.

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Hoverfly1 · 02/10/2022 12:30

He won’t answer the phone to me so there is nothing I can do about it either way. I just like to know if I ABU because I know he will tell me I am in the wrong for expecting him to deal with it when he drops them off! Like @Ponoka7 says it’s probably a power thing!

Even if he has checked and dealt with it, which is highly unlikely, I would just like him to let me know.

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Hankunamatata · 02/10/2022 12:43

You know he is an ass. Get stuff now, I prefer headrin once and shower caps. Leave it on overnight with shower caps. Then do a quick brush and braid in the morning then you can do proper comb monday night.

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MintJulia · 02/10/2022 12:49

If he didn't deal with it immediately, hopefully he'll end up with a personal infestation, all to himself. 😊

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ThatGirlInACountrySong · 02/10/2022 13:07

How old are your kids?

You will know if you have them from itching surely

As pp said have some lotion in ready.

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