Anyone else sick of their moaning, negative, dramatic husband?

[Myhusbandisamoodhoover]

I am.

He endlessly doom scrolls, scares himself silly with talk of houses being repossessed and people freezing to death this winter. He’s convinced himself we’re headed for financial ruin and it seems to be all he thinks about. He’s in a permanent foul mood, stamps around the house swearing under his breath and kicking at things. Every little thing is blown up into a huge drama and spoils the mood of the house for days on end.

Today he’s had breakdowns over a tradesperson not turning up (while he was ranting and swearing I found somebody else to do the work in a few days time), and a ‘mystery’ £20 direct debit that has come out of the joint account (he’s convinced we’re being defrauded or that I am secretly blowing sums of money on myself).

All the while I’m the person who actually keeps calm and solves whatever issue has blown up.

For the record we are financially comfortable and while we will have to cut back slightly we are more fortunate than most and will not be sleeping on the streets.

I’m sick and tired of it.

He sounds depressed and anxious.

He is but he absolutely refuses to do anything about it. He’s convinced his drama is all justified.

You must love a number of the threads of here doing exactly the same thing.

Feeling anxious and worried about the economy and financial matters is fine, but stomping around like a grumpy child is not.

My husband has been gloomy about it too but he doesn't express it like that. Actually, I've been nervous about how things will pan out too. But I don't think it makes sense to constantly wallow in misery about things we can't control. Sadly, these are the times we are living through, it's normal to feel down about it, but at the same time we still need to try and carve out little bits of happiness where we can and ideally not let the depressive mood take over completely. If that's something he's really struggling with then he needs to get some help with his mental health.

Sounds like he needs to find something constructive to do with his time.

It seems to be a thing the past decade or so, middle age white men doom scrolling, getting sucked in by extremist websites, etc. and having an impact on their mental health over time.

Does he exercise regularly, get outside in nature, do any volunteer work?

Is he a MNer? He'd feel at home here.

Yes - you’ve just described my husband to perfection. He’s convinced that we’re going to be homeless despite the fact that our mortgage is paid off. Endless tantrums over petty non events. I feel that he’s loving the energy crisis and it’s the perfect excuse to keep the heating off and freeze. I’m absolutely fucking sick of it.

Aaarghh, I'm a widow but it still sounds dire.. I can't BEAR constant negativity.

And he's a bigamist as well, because I married the same bloke.
Before I had kids I tried to cultivate the habit of not worrying about things I couldn't change. Once I had kids my world shrunk to the point where all I had time to think about was getting through the day. They are older now and the horizon is a bit further off but still, I expect to go home from my stressful, uncertainty-filled job tonight and one or both of my kids will be fretting about something from school. I'll have to go through the mountain of new term paperwork that are still getting, explain a maths problem and get some dinner on all at the same time. Meanwhile DH will be trying to get me on board with his worries about the economy. We both earn what to my working class soul will always seem an absolute fortune, we could pay our mortgage off right now off of savings, we have solar panels that provide most of our leccy and all our hot water, you couldn't be in a much better position. To point this out will only worry him more. I'm just not that interested in why he is like this any more. We all have our hangups, but the time he devotes to this shite is just incredible.

My DH is similar in that he predicts all the horrid failings of govt and economic downturns that are about to happen before they do. He predicted lockdown in Dec 2019 and the GBP getting to parity with the USD 3weeks ago. War btw Russia and Ukraine since 2020. Recession and housing market crash in 2009 when I didn't know him but his friends said he'd told them so they call him to find out what's about to happen. The mistake of Truss for the economy, etc. The issue is that he doesn't use any of this info for his/our benefit. However, he doesn't let any of it affect him; infact it's almost the opposite. He's calm and let's opportunity pass him by. He's a very brilliant economists with firsts from all his 3 Cambridge degrees but doesn't feel comfortable working for any organisation unless they're charities that can't pay him. I need to find a way to light a fire under him!

I’ve come to the conclusion he actively enjoys it. He works from home and refreshes the news constantly, only breaking to come in and give me the latest ‘update’ about how doomed we all are.

I think you need a LTB 🤣

The irony is if I LTB he really would be financially ruined 😂 he earns well but his properties haven’t done well over the years, I earn less but inherited quite young and put it all into my house.

Anyway I won’t LTB as he works hard, pulls his weight round the house and when he isn’t letting the economy ruin his mood, is a funny/interesting/stable person. I just want him to snap out of it.

He doesn’t fancy becoming Chancellor does he? I think we could do with him at the moment.