AIBU?
To reduce wages/hours for the sake of university/my sanity!
UnbalancedMum · 30/09/2022 09:32
Hi,
This might be a load of waffle so bare with me i'm feeling very scrambled currently.
I'm 30, have four children 12,10,8 and 6. So 3DC are in primary and eldest DD in YR8.
I currently work as a TA at their school, I'm contracted 8.30-3.30 but often in before 8 as they go to breakfast club as I do not have to pay for this and means I can get in and prep for the day etc. I work in KS1 and also teach phonics.
My husband is a HGV driver so long hours and early starts but never works away, is always home for evenings and weekends.
I am in my second year of Open Uni, studying a psychology degree. I am studying this year full time, as I have continued on my degree from 2009 (I took a very long break due to children and ill health myself) so I have until 2025 to complete so I need to do this year full time. It works out about 32 hours study a week (recommended) I'm hoping to apply for a doctorate in the future to become a counselling psychologist, so I really need to try and get a first class honours. Anyway...
I am really struggling to balance having four children, running a home, (a few pets), working 30 hours, studying full time and actually trying to stay alive and sane and have time for my family and myself!
I had a breakdown 2017 and I really do not want to get back to that stage.
AIBU to look for something like midday supervisor work? I still need term time work due to the primary DC. The time in the mornings and afternoons would allow me to bring back some balance I think. The wages would be significantly less than what I'm on (but being a TA isn't millions is it 😆) It would only be for this year then I can study my level 3 modules part time again and increase my hours/find other work.
I read about others working full time and studying full time with families and I think if they can do it, why can't i? But i'm struggling and I'm not sure what to do.
Thank-you for reading if you got this far!
Am I being unreasonable?
AIBUYou have one vote. All votes are anonymous.
DanielBare · 30/09/2022 10:41
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NumberTheory · 30/09/2022 10:55
YANBU. Ignore DanielBare’s advice to cheat, it’s not going to help you get where you want to be and you won’t feel as good about it either. Could you ask your school if you can go part time? Do you have a way to cope with a lower income while prices are rising? Given the issue with needing to get the degree finished, it may be worthwhile going into a little debt to cover lost wages, but that’s a risk you’d have to think about.
rbe78 · 30/09/2022 11:11
If your family can cope with the loss of income, you would definitely not be unreasonable. A full-time degree is exactly that - full-time. It must be almost impossible to balance that with an almost full-time job and four young children.
UnbalancedMum · 30/09/2022 11:40
Thank-you for your replies. I really appreciate those and just knowing someone else thinks I'm not being unreasonable helps 😆
I did consider asking my work if i could reduce my days to either 3 or 4, even 1 day off a week would make a difference that might just be enough to get me through as that wouldn't be too much of a loss of income with the rising costs.
I've never requested part time hours, I've been there since April, is there a time limit you have to be there for before you can request part time hours?
NumberTheory · 30/09/2022 16:59
UnbalancedMum · 30/09/2022 11:40
Thank-you for your replies. I really appreciate those and just knowing someone else thinks I'm not being unreasonable helps 😆
I did consider asking my work if i could reduce my days to either 3 or 4, even 1 day off a week would make a difference that might just be enough to get me through as that wouldn't be too much of a loss of income with the rising costs.
I've never requested part time hours, I've been there since April, is there a time limit you have to be there for before you can request part time hours?
Obviously you can ask at any point, but there’s no legal requirement for them to consider a flexible working request (which I think this would be) until you’ve been there for, I think, 26 weeks. So you might want to wait for that. If you’re in a union it wouldn’t hurt to see if they have any advice or support for doing this.
ElephantLover · 30/09/2022 17:16
If you can go PT 3 days/week it would give you 2 full days to do your studies which would be ideal. Mid day work everyday would be more disrupting I think.
SamuelCrenshaw · 02/10/2022 11:39
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WeAreAllLionesses · 02/10/2022 11:55
Do NOT do what @SamuelCrenshaw suggests - what is the point of that?
Op, you sound like you will find a way. Good luck to you - I have a family of 4, a PT job and doing a PT OU degree and that is challenging enough!!
SamuelCrenshaw · 03/10/2022 09:12
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