to TTC before we've exchanged on new house?

[babyorhouse]

My partner and I have both just turned 36, we have been trying to buy a house for 2 years in this crazy market. Our ‘plan’ was to get a house bought, get married, then TTC. We currently privately rent a teeny tiny 2 bedroom house, which has just enough room for us two and my teenager from a previous relationship. We are part of the way through the conveyancing for a house purchase however there is no sign of things being completed any time soon as we are in a chain. We are getting married in a few weeks and we'd loosely planned TTC after that, and DP is still keen to do this even though we haven’t exchanged contracts or anything on the house. He is positive the house move will be done before a hypothetical baby came along and that even if it hadn’t we’d ‘sort something else out’ either buy or rent somewhere else even though there’s not much else out there for either. I am stressing about potentially still renting this tiny house with a newborn and feeling trapped, I know they don’t take up much space and would be in our room for 6+ months regardless of where we lived. But to me it feels insecure and uncertain, and owning a house is what I really wanted before bringing a new baby into the mix. On the flip side I’m wary of my age and declining fertility and I don’t want to keep putting TTC off and there is never a right time to try. I’m aware it could take a while to conceive but again it could also take one cycle. I don’t know what is most sensible or if I’m just overthinking things and being too much of a perfectionist/control freak.

YABU - get on with TTC and deal with whatever happens
YANBU - wait until you've got the house before TTC

Get the house bought, then TTC. We're entering a really uncertain world, so I think it's sensible to nail down as many variables as possible.

On a side note, I'm always wary about men who push for babies when things are clearly in a state of uncertainty. It's rarely they who are left to pick up the pieces when things go tits up...

Also, that's a hell of a lot of change (marriage, house move, baby) for your teenager to process in a short time frame. Take a beat. Your fertility is unlikely to go over a cliff in the next 12 months, but your sanity might if you play this wrong.

I’d start trying but wait until you’re married - you don’t want to be puking on your wedding day.

You’re 36, so you don’t really have the time to wait and you’ll regret it if you leave it too late.

This is spot on, please remember that this doesn't just affect you. There is an existing child whose needs come first.

House wise you can manage with a baby if need be for a few months. I find most people that have babies first tend to forget about getting married though as it's even harder to find the money... if a baby is more important to you than marriage go for it

Life’s too short.

Wait until after your wedding then go for it, babies take 9 months of cooking usually, then they sleep in your room for 6 months at least

I'd wait. If for some reason the house sale falls through, and you end up having to renew your agreement in prinicipal (assuming you're not cash buyers), then an upcoming maternity leave will likely affect your lendability.