Anyone else feel everything is pointless?

[Notallthosewhowander1]

I feel so disillusioned with the state of the world, particularly the war, that I no longer see the point in anything and in particular in planning ahead. I’m meant to be getting married soon, for example, but I’ve stopped organising anything as it feels like we could all be wiped from existence by the time November comes around. I can’t tell my partner these things but he’s asking why I’m not interested in the planning.

Does anyone else feel this way? Am I just dramatic? Thought about going to the GP but it doesn’t feel like depression.

Well here's a thought experiment for you. If you never read the news you wouldn't know about the war. All you know about it is what you see and read in the media and online. The war isn't happening to you, your home, your family. There is actually no meaningful impact on you. So how could it possibly impact on your happiness? Well.. it wouldn't.

You have a choice in what you choose to focus your thoughts on.

If you experience difficulties in exercising that choice, medication can help get a handle on the procession of thoughts. Put some distance between yourself and the thoughts. Learn to think different thoughts maybe. Thankfulness, optimism, simple enjoyment.

The world is full of problems, yes. But how many of those are your problems? Very few. Things are probably totally fine for you. You are allowed to enjoy your life.

You say you can't talk to your partner - why not? I think you should be able to talk about this with your life partner.

I think the way you feel is understandable, to an extent. But I could also be wiped out, and I don't feel like there is no point. I feel like I may as well get on and enjoy today.

My partner isn’t worried, but then he doesn’t watch a lot of news at all, he has a lot going on in his work life etc!

In a cosmic sense there is literally no point in anything we do.

But the world has been in dire straits before and if humans are good at anything it's girding our loins and getting on with it.

However, the despair and loss of interest in important life things like a wedding could well be a sign of depression. It's certainly worth talking to your GP about if you can, you can hardly just go on for the rest of your life never doing anything in case you die tomorrow.

My religion wisely says that if you planting a tree when the end of the world comes, keep on planting.

Stop watching the news.

Things aren't great at the moment OP. But it's still possible to find happiness in the smaller things in life.

I think perhaps you're watching the news but not truly understanding what's going on. Putin isn't going to hit the button. There'd be a coup.

Chances are you could be sat at your wedding wondering why you hadn't secured your favourite local band, got the bridesmaid dresses adjusted etc ....because you thought the world might have ended.

If the world does end it won't be a problem if you have booked the band - but if it doesn't it might be.

Might as well crack on. Switch off the rolling news and live in your real world

It does sound like a mental health problem OP, if you're so anxious that you don't see any point planning for the near future, and it's something your GP will be able to help with. I expect if someone told you they weren't interested in planning for their wedding in a few months' time because they might get into a car crash or the venue might burn down so what was the point, you'd be able to see pretty clearly that that wasn't a normal way of thinking. It's just that your anxiety is magnifying the likelihood of the war affecting the UK to the point where you're convinced it will happen, so you can't see that you're also acting irrationally.Anxiety also has this way sometimes of making you feel like you'll be jinxing things if you stop worrying about them - i.e. if you take your mind off the state of the world and focus on your wedding it will somehow cause all of us to be wiped from existence, whereas if you fixate on the news it's less likely to happen. Obviously that's not true, and what will actually happen if you're able to turn your attention to wedding planning is that you'll feel loads happier and the course of international affairs won't change in the slightest. Like Merlott says, you're allowed to enjoy your life - in fact her whole post is really good.

I think this is a Covid hangover, personally. For the first time in our modern lives we had control taken away from us, and I think it's easy to think that's going to happen again. I had so much planned and organised, and all of it just ....wiped. Again, and again. Each time I'd get my hopes up, trashed.
So now, even when I've got positive stuff in the future, I feel somewhat hopeless about it, hard to get excited. I just assume something is going to come along and ruin it. With sutff like the war in the news it's easy to put that in the place of Covid and assume it will have a negative impact on our future.

True there could be nuclear war soon, but any of us could be hit by a bus tomorrow too. I think you've just been worn down by the constant bad news, bills, energy crisis, and God knows what else. If I were you I'd place a social media and news ban on myself for at least a few weeks and go out there and just have an awesome time as often as possible!!

I don't know how you think there could be a nuclear war soon @Softplayhooray - we are not even nearly close.

You don't have to watch the news, you know. You really don't. Just stop for a bit.

I agree with others op, have a break from the news and see if you feel different. It's very doom and gloom and remember the old news saying 'if it bleeds, it leads.'

Definitely get this

Put some music on, turn off the news, and you will feel a million times better immediately.

I felt similar until I listened to a Ukrainian fighter speaking. They asked him how he felt about Kyiv going somewhat back to normal whilst others, like him, we’re getting killed on the frontline. He basically said if people aren’t living and enjoying their lives then they are fighting for nothing.

No matter what tomorrow brings (and I honestly don’t think it will be nuclear war) if I’ve enjoyed what time I have then Putin will have lost and that’s okay with me.

Joy, love and life are all reason enough for me to find meaning.

When you are old like me you know that everything passes, the bad times and the good times too unfortunately. The economy is tanking and there's war in Europe, but not for the first time. Stop sm and watching the news. Focus on the good things because there are lots.

I think you have to look at it the other way around - take what enjoyment you can here and now, cherish and love your family and friends people, take little opportunities to make a difference.

if the world ends, I’d want to know I had attempted to make the most of the life I was given.

Take a social media and news break, it’s absolutely great for MH.

Well, the odds of us being wiped out by November are so tiny, it's actually foolish not to plan as though we will be here. None of us know how long we're here for, but we don't put our lives on hold waiting to die. We assume there's a to-morrow and plan accordingly. I also agree with the pp about making the most of chances to be happy. Planning your wedding should be enjoyable, so don't waste it.

I was here in 1999 - convinced the world was over (yogoslavia and nato and Russia) to the point i thought about suffocating my young at the time children to save them pain. I was convinced i was right and everyone else was ignoring the reality. Turns out my mum was convinced in 1961 it was the end of the world (cuba) and my daughter was so upset with the end of the world countdown done for a joke when the hadron collider was turned on (gmtv. Tossers) it took weeks before she believed we werent going to all get wiped out.
See your doctor - you could do with some help to get perspective again. Prosac for me.
Good luck op

I'm a bit disillusioned with the predictable jump to MH issues/ depression. I honestly think sadness, (non-chemical) depression and hopelessness are legitimate and logical emotional responses to the issues our world, on a small and a large scale, is facing. I think those saying not engaging with national and international news prove this point.

I do take anti-depressants and they work by numbing my feelings stopping me dropping low - it allows me to function and carry on but I don't believe there is anything wrong with my brain chemistry. I think I am unhappy at living in a world with cruel, nasty, selfish humans and need a bit of anaesthetic. I can (and have had) have counselling, exercise, healthy food, meditation etc. but I've still suffered personally and see shit on local, national and global levels that make me hopeless.

OP, I’m similarly anxious but in my case, most of my anxiety is focused on environmental issues. When I allow myself to read about it and think about it, I become convinced that we’re in end times (all of which has brought me quite close to belief in a greater being, having been a staunch atheist for all of my adulthood. I can only assume me it’s panic and feelings of helplessness that have caused this). I feel extremely negative and pessimistic about the world and about humanity.

My only strategies are to keep myself busy, do what I can to look after the planet, and simply not allow myself time or opportunity to ruminate or read about it. I don’t know if this is the healthiest strategy but it works, sort of. I also do a fair bit of yoga and meditation, along with other types of exercise. These help because they force me to just be in my body instead of spending too much time inside my own head.

How old are you? I'm nearly 60. There is always a war. Always end of everything. When l was at primary school there were public information films about how to survive a nuclear war. I was so scared. Now I'm like yes there is a another war another recession..same old. Please don't worry