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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To tell her now

13 replies

blondepinkaudi · 26/09/2022 18:15

My neighbour let me borrow her car as mines in the garage, I get on really well with her and we have a good relationship

I got home and noticed a scuff on the bumper, I don't know if it was already there but I'm pretty sure it wasn't. It's not a bad scuff.

If I did it, it would've been today when I pulled in on a country lane to let other cars pass.

The wheels were super muddy when I got back on that side so I washed them.

The neighbours have a ring camera so might have seen me inspect the scuff

It really isn't a bad scuff but I feel so bad cos she was doing me a favour.

OH said just to wait and see what she says. She will notice it as she washes her car by hand.

It's an old car and I don't think the scuff will bother her much, more so her husband or more so that she did me a favour and i scuffed it.

I have OCD so it might not even have been me but I'm pretty sure it was. I didn't feel it but it looks fresh.

AIBU : tell her now even if it wasn't me and offer to fix it

YANBU: might not have been me anyway and she might not notice and if she did then say something

OP posts:
Darbs76 · 26/09/2022 18:17

I’d definitely ask her about it

Freshberry · 26/09/2022 18:18

Absolutely tell her! Why on earth wouldn't you? If you're not sure if it was you, tell her you've noticed a scuff and it could have happened on the country lane.

If you aren't prepared to pay for any damage you may cause to someone else's property then you shouldnt borrow any.

Bywayofanupdate · 26/09/2022 18:19

Definitely tell her. If she finds out you knew and didn't tell her that will be the end of your good relationship. You can just say 'I noticed this, not sure if I did it or not'

Snowyjet · 26/09/2022 18:20

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blondepinkaudi · 26/09/2022 18:22

Oh I definitely want to tell her and fix it honestly!

More so I don't know if it was me or not?

I don't want her to hate me because she was doing me a favour.

She might not know if the scuff was there first or not, but I'd offer to fix it either way

More worried she'll hate me for it

OP posts:
Wibbly1008 · 26/09/2022 18:22

Just fess up, you have a good friend there so do the honest thing

ArcaneWireless · 26/09/2022 18:22

Just tell her. That’s what good neighbours and friends do.

ShaneTwane · 26/09/2022 18:23

She wont hate you for it thats your ocd talking.

Just let her know you have noticed a scuff and dont know if its recent or not and offer to repair if it is.

Airymanning · 26/09/2022 18:24

She won't hate you. She may get annoyed but she won't hate you for telling truth.

LuckyLil · 26/09/2022 18:24

If it wasn't you she'll already know anyway. You have a good friend if they lend cars to you. Don't blow it, tell her immediately. If it's not a big deal it won't matter.

blondepinkaudi · 26/09/2022 20:28

I braved it and told her and she said it was already there! Damn ocd wins again

OP posts:
SummerInSun · 26/09/2022 20:36

Now she knows that you are an honest person who would tell her if you thought she had damaged her car. No harm in that at all.

LimitIsUp · 26/09/2022 21:33

blondepinkaudi · 26/09/2022 20:28

I braved it and told her and she said it was already there! Damn ocd wins again

I expect you've gone up in her estimation

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