To think if you are a family of 4 and struggling on £100k…

[LetMeSpeak]

That it is purely down to mismanagement.

I saw a debate on social media and I also know a few people on 6 figure salaries, have extremely nice houses and cars. Yet complain that they are stuggling the same way others with less money. Aibu to think if you are really struggling even in this economy, a lot of it is due to mismanagement with your money?

I know people on very low incomes who are comfortable because they live in social housing, have no childcare costs and receive top up benefits. When you earn more money you are taxed more and you have to pay more for things like childcare and rent. It’s not as simple as “they earn three times what I do so they have three times more money”.

@LetMeSpeak, so you know the answer to the question already, 2 X school fees us large mortgage. Everyone cuts their cloth according to their budget.

Honestly we have 100k coming in - wouldn’t say we struggle ! But we have a massive mortgage on a 2 bed flat in London, not a big flashy house, no car, but very expensive childcare (4k a month for 2 kids under 3) so there’s fuck all left at the end of the month.

i suppose we could move somewhere cheaper but where, what about our jobs etc - we can’t downside our house as we are already in a 2 bed !

I really think it’s all relative and depends where you live in the country whether 100k is a lot of money or not

I’m not complaining or saying I’m poor by any means and on a few years when nursery fees stop we will be way better off

but we are not Mismanaging our money at all

I think you should mind your own business and let us tackle ours. It’s the same as richer people suggesting those on lower incomes just “get a better paid job”

You are right as I see people on low incomes slated for their "poor choices" everyday, and not just those on benefits, much more often than those on higher incomes. We should all just stay out of each other's business.

Not really - certain costs are hard to suddenly rein in when things get tight.

Large mortgage for example... if you have kids in private school.

They may not be struggling in the sense that people who need food banks are, but it's reasonable for them to say they are feeling the pinch from the increased cost of living..

31.4 k post tax ( including council tax ) and pension is the average uk household income

www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/personalandhouseholdfinances/incomeandwealth/bulletins/householddisposableincomeandinequality/financialyearending2021

If anyone is struggling on 100k, they're struggling because they have made choices they can't afford.

I live in the SE and have a disabled DC. I'm a carer. My money equals about 30k take home a year.

Yet we manage holiday every year, nice clothes for DC, can walk into Asda and buy whatever I want. Money for a savings.

People like to trot out 'oh yeah but my mortgage is crazy for my 5 bed, and private school is so costly'

Well yes, I could be on £1million a year and find ways to make myself 'struggle'

If you're after just a decent normal lifestyle, you're rolling in it at 100k

@LetMeSpeak your link says

Median household disposable income in the UK was £31,400

that's not the same as household income. Key word is disposable...

I don’t think people have taken it for granted but house prices have risen so much, people buying in the last 10 years for the first time have had no choice but to take on massive mortgages. Our mortgage is 3x our joint income and is going to be very difficult to afford when the fixed rate ends. The alternative was paying higher and ever increasing rents. Where I live a 3 bed is upwards of £400k, a 2 bed flat is at least £275-300k and will then also have service charges/ground rent. I am not in a particularly expensive area for the SE either. What are people meant to do? They need shelter.

Selling a house suddenly isn't simple - stamp duty for one is a huge sunk cost.

Also highly disruptive to remove kids from private school on a whim. Most parents will cut back on everything else before randomly disrupting their kids' education & friendships etc.

This is a bit of a silly Q tbh

Most people have a lifestyle based on a certain income and end up making financial commitments which don't just evaporate when circumstances change. Someone on £100k may have a large mortgage, school fees, perhaps are paying off old debt (student debt for example, not just credit card debt, but paying for the training that got them their salary) and they can't just switch that off. Of course they'll struggle for a bit if their income stream changes.

You seem awfully fixated on what they earn and have op,

irrelevant of what you earn you spend what you can afford. Wit some disposable income. When costs escalate hugely its an issue, doesn’t matter if your a family of three in a two bedroom or whatever.

but I suggest you know this,

It's roughly 3x the average household income though.
Which means the majority of the population (most of whom don't live in Grimsby) manage to survive on a lot less.

OP agree to some extent but would expand it to 'mismanagement OR the result of their own priorities.' e.g. as pps have said, they have chosen to live in a certain place/type of house/send kids to private school/whatever.

Like your friends - having a nice house might not necessarily mean money mismanagement even if it means they are struggling to buy other things, it's just prioritising x (house) over y. If y is a foreign holiday or private school or something else they feel they should be able to afford given their salaries, then that isn't mismanagement. If y is putting on the heating or buying food then it is.
People on good salaries often use 'struggling for money' to mean 'don't have as much spare cash as I'd like/feel I should have given my gross income', rather than 'We earn £100k and can't afford to feed our kids.'

I agree with you op.
Some people aren’t prepared to downscale.
What car do they drive? Where do they live? What are they spending money on etc etc.
You absolutely can live on less than £100,000 it is quite obscene to suggest you can’t.

@lannistunut As explained above, many of us do not have the 'choice' of where we spend. The cost of housing (especially rent in places like London) leave no space for mannouvering. I could leave in a 2 bedroom house and have my 15 and 17 year old teenage girl and boy share and it may save me 500 pounds living in quite a shitty place. And if anything goes wrong, there is no finding another rental agreement at all. You can only downsize while salary is secure and you can afford. Which, in my case, requres both my husband's and mine good salaries. We live a very frugal life and I can only feel really bad for those who don't have those.

It’s not as simple as “they earn three times what I do so they have three times more money”.

this too

Household income of around 90k combined here, both working FT, 2 primary age kids. Midlands, 3 bed semi, 2 cars over 10years old, holidays in the UK since kids (eldest 8yo) were born <£1k budget. I'm horrified at the price rises in the supermarket today. Ive not budgeted hard for a while- we grew up counting the pennies and I will be back to making every one count. We will be ok with lifestyle changes but how on earth are others going to survive?!

No one expected this massive shit show. So everyone will be having to take action to cope with high food inflation, and high energy costs. There was no slow build-up - it's hit like a tornado just when everyone wanted to 'get back to normal' after two years of on/off again lockdown.

Making major savings is difficult for everyone - mortgage, cars, loans etc. Even if you've a buffer it's being hit pretty hard right now. Childcare is also horribly expensive.

I get that it's hard to feel sympathy for people on massive salaries, but mismanagement suggests frittering away on crap they can easily stop doing.

If anyone is struggling on 100k, they're struggling because they have made choices they can't afford.

How should young people chose to be born decades ago & reverse the wage stagnation of the last 10 years?

YANBU that is more than double what most households have to spend.

I don’t believe anyone actually struggles on that amount even if they feed their dogs caviar and I think when they moan about money it’s just a way to show off how much better off they are than most people.

Sure but who suggested you can’t? This is about peoples current outgoings increasing so much . What do you want them to do.,sell their house and cars?

It does depend on your lifestyle so what you are used to.

For example when we first got married and had dd, we'd gone from both being students. A rare treat was fish and chips, normally a portion shared between us. Almost everything was second hand. We didn't have a car, so just didn't go anywhere we needed one. When we needed something we weighed up carefully what we could afford and sometimes decided we could manage without it. We did as much stuff ourselves and mended things etc. We were perfectly happy, didn't feel deprived.

20 years later we have a car, three children and now we both work. It's not worth the extra time searching second hand for everything, so we get more things news. We have a car and don't think anything of popping in the car to go out. We don't go out often, but we do go out for birthday meals at restaurants. When something goes wrong in the house, we get someone out and get it sorted.

It would be hard to go back to our live 20 years ago, but if we had never changed then we wouldn't feel that it was a hardship.

My apologies I misread the ons report the average isn’t £31.5k .

im talking about huge mortgages. The ones that people are just able to afford. It feels like people are are getting those mortgages because they can. They aren’t thinking about hour they would be able to afford it the financial situation changes.

like I when you have more money you have more finical options. Nobody have forced you to get the huge mortgage it’s was your decision and luxury option your had due to your salary.

All these excuses being made on why 100k for a family of 4 is a struggle can be used with millionaire and billionaires.

Nice flat in London, holiday home, car, camper, holidays, new clothes/shoes as needed, savings for a rainy day. We’re doing more than alright thanks.

If someone chooses to mismanage their money, it doesn’t mean the income isn’t enough to have a comfortable life.

My dc go to state school, lots of parents have 100k household incomes. The vast majority have 2nd hand cars, shop in Aldi, holiday in U.K. etc.