My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

AIBU to ask for advice for either scenario

9 replies

reachforthebloodymary · 24/09/2022 16:17

I have been out of work for close to 10 years, the majority of this is due to mental health reasons, just to give you an insight that this was not a decision we came to as a family together.

However, I have now recently started job searching, had some interviews at the end of last week and now just waiting to hear.

They are all different type jobs, with various pros and cons, but if I get offered one, I am unsure how to approach the salary negotiation, do I accept what is offered, or do I argue for me, I have been out of work for so long I am not even sure what is good, I have done research on what the minimum might be, they are all level entry jobs, but do I go with I want this? in the case of one of them, they offer a work from home for two days a week, is it acceptable to say I will take less money to be able to work at home an extra day?

While I am desperately trying to not get excited about the prospect about being offered a job, I also have to acknowledge that due to being out of work so long, I am not a great prospect (maybe?) so I might get turned down by all three and if thats the case how would you deal with that?

Just not to dripfeed, none of the employeers know the real reason I have been out of work, they all have assumed its due to taking time out to raise my child and I havent corrected them on this and I am not sure now whether I am doing the right thing on that for any other potential employeers,

If anyone has any advice I would really appreciate it

OP posts:

Am I being unreasonable?

4 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
75%
You are NOT being unreasonable
25%
NoSquirrels · 24/09/2022 16:53

Did all the jobs have a salary band advertised? If they are entry-level positions, then your bargaining power is limited, because they have determined what they think the role is worth and you won’t really be able to demonstrate added value at this career stage. The offer will be the offer, I’d expect.

In terms of WFH, I would certainly NOT try to offer to take a lower salary for less days in-office. Their position on hybrid working sounds like they mandate the split of in-office to WFH, and if they negotiate for you (a new starter) more days at home then everyone else’s contracts would be under review too. It’s likely this is a non-starter. You could ask if it is possible to do an extra day WFH, but be prepared for them to say no. If you wanted to make a flexible working request once you’re employed (& have proved yourself a bit) you might have it approved that way. But that’s a big might. I’d say when you’re starting a new role after so long out of the workplace you will probably benefit more from going into the office, TBH.

If you don’t get offered any, dust yourself off and try again. Any interview experience is valuable.

CakeMonster1 · 24/09/2022 16:58

You really don't need to say you have been out of work due to mental health unless they ask or if you are given a health questionnaire etc
Bearing in mind 1 in 4 people suffer with some form of mental health issues in their life then it would probably only come up if it was asked/would effect the job.

As for salary, unless it states negotiable then it's generally what the salary is advertised as.

Good luck and hope all goes well x

reachforthebloodymary · 24/09/2022 17:05

Thank you so much for your advice @NoSquirrels

I have gone back and looked and none of them have a salary band advertised, I have a range between what is my bare minimum to what is a nice to have.

I have learnt a load already from the interviews I have had and I am trying to look at it from more fun side of things (I am getting out and about to different places and walking a ton) I know it might be a long, slow process and we are prepared for tha, I think I have been fairly lucky in getting the interviews I have done so far, given the gap

OP posts:
reachforthebloodymary · 24/09/2022 17:06

CakeMonster1 · 24/09/2022 16:58

You really don't need to say you have been out of work due to mental health unless they ask or if you are given a health questionnaire etc
Bearing in mind 1 in 4 people suffer with some form of mental health issues in their life then it would probably only come up if it was asked/would effect the job.

As for salary, unless it states negotiable then it's generally what the salary is advertised as.

Good luck and hope all goes well x

Thanks CakeMonster

I dont particularly want to mention it and I think I have it pretty well under control now, but I am worried about diving head first into a job and it to raise its very ugly head again

OP posts:
Aeio · 24/09/2022 17:11

I think, if you're brand new to it, you might struggle a bit with 3 days from home. I'd ask if there is potential to increase days spent at home after successfully passing probation.

Salary, surely no harm in asking for something a bit extra. A lot of people who have taken time out to raise family (as they assume you have) have greater patience, empathy, time management and lots of other useful skills, in my experience.

If you don't get any offers, you ask for interview feedback, take it on board and keep trying.

Good luck!

Jenn3112 · 24/09/2022 17:15

I think if you haven't worked in 10 years and the job is entry level then you are very unlikely to be successful negotiating a higher salary unless you have direct previous experience and it is not a sector that has significantly changed in 10 years. Just take what you can get and then once you are settled look for a next step up.

reachforthebloodymary · 24/09/2022 17:50

@Aeio I have had a few other interviews, where I have been turned down, but this is the first time I have had to wait over a weekend and with so many, so my brain is doing fruitloops

Also thank you, you are the second one to say WFH would be a struggle, so I have taken that on board and abandoned even thinking about it.

@Jenn3112

None of them I have direct experience in and I would say in all three, I would be learning whole new industries (think admin/customer service roles)

I am thinking whatever job I get I would have to stay in at least a year minimum. I use to be fairly ambitious in my career, when I was younger, but I am not sure I want that now

OP posts:
Liz1tummypain · 24/09/2022 18:14

Unless you feel the salary offered is unreasonably low,and in fact even if it is, given that you' ve applied for the jobs,I think it would be wrong to start trying for more money. I assume you already knew what the pay rates were. But if somehow you didn't already know the salaries then yes, you could start a negotiation

It all depends how much you want the job and if they offer it to you. Good luck and don't feel the need to say anything more on your reasons for the gap in your work history. You'll be fine 🙂 🙂

reachforthebloodymary · 24/09/2022 20:14

Liz1tummypain · 24/09/2022 18:14

Unless you feel the salary offered is unreasonably low,and in fact even if it is, given that you' ve applied for the jobs,I think it would be wrong to start trying for more money. I assume you already knew what the pay rates were. But if somehow you didn't already know the salaries then yes, you could start a negotiation

It all depends how much you want the job and if they offer it to you. Good luck and don't feel the need to say anything more on your reasons for the gap in your work history. You'll be fine 🙂 🙂

None of the jobs, had a salary band, I will make sure I check this from no on though, so I can manage expectations

thank you, I go from being wildly excited to petrified

OP posts:
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.