Hate job, dyslexia, scary manager
HairBow · 23/09/2022 18:21
I started a new job internally this year, quite a change as admin but same grade and I hate it. I'm constantly anxious, freezing and forgetting stuff, manager is breathing down my neck to manage the team and huge workload with limited knowledge. I feel like a wreck and it's impacting on DH and kids.
In my last role I didn't need dyslexia adjustments. Declared to employer and on application form too. Issues are recall, remembering dates, learning process. I use lots of coping strategies like writing everything down, diary/calendar, planning workload, reminders for dates etc.
Despite this I've made mistakes (some due to poor training by colleagues giving me wrong info, when I told manager she viewed it as my problem) and the situation has knocked my confidence so much I can't cope.
Training when I started was specific to that point in the year. I've asked for more I.T training but been told the issue is accuracy and speed. I just can't telepathically know what long serving team members do. I work early/late/read up at weekends but it's not enough. I can feel the managers frustration, she now wants to 'support' me with adjustments but really she's trying to manage me out.
I can't hand my notice in due to money, but am looking at other internal jobs but my confidence is rock bottom. However hard I try it's wrong and I'm exhausted. I've also got some physical health problems but was 'encouraged' to come back to work when still unwell. I now need to come into the office daily as it will 'help.' This takes away the only quiet respite I had. The goal posts are constantly moved re work, emails not cc'd into, situations where 'we did this two years ago' (how could I possibly know when I was not there???) etc. not sure why im posting but I feel so anxious and low
Justmeandme19 · 12/10/2022 18:37
Hey. Xx I totally get where your coming from. I'm also dyslexic and have found things tricky in certain jobs. I'm lucky most of my job is hands in, but I do still struggle.
Do you know what it is that your struggling with?
I personally struggle in several different areas. I also struggle to keep up with instruction/change. I'm just not a quick learner and this really brings me a lot on anxiety. I find people get annoyed with me as I sometimes carn't just follow instructions. Combined that with a massive lack of confidence it can be very hard.
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