To not want to spend £100 on a hotel for work Xmas party

[andreee]

My work Xmas party has just been announced, it is back to pre covid tradition - go to a huge ‘party to a party’ in a major city just over an hour away, work pay for tickets and drinks but you need to cover your own travel and hotel. Usually apparently everybody stays in a hotel and the girls will all get ready together, and go for breakfast the morning after. There is carpooling as well. I have never been to this before as I only joined the company during covid.

I am going to have to answer the dreaded invite next week and just don’t think I can afford to go. I don’t want to splash out on the hotel and nobody can share a room with me as they’re all bringing partners. I’ve had a look and the cheapest room I can find is £100!

Could just not drink, and drive home on the night, but at the minute the petrol there and back would not be much cheaper than the hotel! Money is so tight (single homeowner, it’s rough right now).

My boss has done a generous thing but doesn’t realise they have effectively priced me out of going to this party. It looks incredible and I do want to go, feel a bit left out with colleagues as it is already. Bit sad isn’t it.

What would you do? If I tell people the truth I don’t want them feeling bad, but if I make some other excuse it might look like I don’t care!

This!! 🤣

God, definitely don't ask for a week out of the office in case you get Christmas Party Covid. That would be super weird!

This. Just drive. Yes it's a tedious work night out but unless you're a total jobsworth then it's good to do some things socially to promote a better team environment.

There's no way fuel will cost as much as the hotel.

I'd much rather drive home. Stay off the booze and not ruin rest of your weekend with a bad head.

For people saying ‘just drive’: I wouldn’t want to have a normal day at work (including whatever home shite you have to do before and after) and then drive to the venue (in probably shit winter weather) then home whilst I’m knackered.

I drive lots and all over Europe but I really wouldn’t fancy that.

That’s weird, surely employees hotel rooms would be tax deductible so wouldn’t cost the business money?

Anyway if was me I’d just decline the invite and tell two people - your boss and a gossip - that money is so tight that you literally can’t afford to spend £100 in a party riggt now.

I’ve worked for many different employers and been to many xmas parties and never heard if employees having to pay for more than a taxi. Seems weird.

A work social where you have to cover your own hotel?!?
Jeez, I'd not be able to politely say no quick enough.

My company cover all the costs and I still politely say no. I spend up the 50 hours a week with them! As lovely as they are, I've got better things to do in my own time than spend even more bloody time with them 😂

Don't worry about it.

Set yourself a new tradition for work Christmas parties.

I loved them in my 20's I couldn't think of anything worse now early 40's.

If you really want to go to the party talk to the boss as he is generous he might help with costs.

I wouldn't go to a party where everyone was getting pissed as fast as possible on free booze when I was driving. There is no point as it's hideous being sober when everyone else is pissed. Go and stay over or don't go atall imo

Agree with PP. And you might mention that as a single person, the extra costs to attend - travel and hotel - are particularly steep. As you say all your colleagues have partners which helps share the cost.

I've worked at places where the Christmas party was great, at others where it was dire and I've left early. But I've never forked out more than parking or train fare to an event like this. And that alone is enough grounds for me, no matter how great the party might be, to turn it down. Doubly so for "presence expected" that is going to cost me more than a couple of quid.

For the "presence expected" i like pp suggestion of talking about it when it comes up, but something crops up on the day and you can't go.

We’re expected to go to ours to bond with the other offices. It’s my idea of hell. Luckily it’s in November and I’m busy with birthdays in November 😁

How tight is tight? If you want to go, is there any room to make cutbacks to free up £100 over the next few months? If everything else is covered and you 'only' have to find the cost of the hotel room, it might be doable? Look on Moneysaving Expert - there's several banks willing to pay you more than £100 just to switch banks to them, so that's the money right there.

Have you asked to see if anyone else is looking to share a room? Surely there must be at least one other person at your company (of the same sex) who is either single or their partner isn't going due to other commitments/not wanting to go? Seems a shame to miss out on a great night when you actually want to attend.

Single in my 20s and 30s I loved the Christmas Party. Really good fun with people I liked.
My last one I was being made redundant so just showed my face and slunk out.

Back then, I'd have found the money to go if I really wanted to go.

But I won't find the money if I don't want to. If you don't want to go, just don't, it's a lot of money.

In mumsnet speak, it's an invitation not a summons.

Oh no just realised the forced fun of the work Christmas party shall be back on

decline you won’t be the only one and if asked tell them money is tight and you need to be back home in the evening

Oh you have plans already on that day?

Such a shame! Maybe next year 😉

An hour costs about £5 in fuel, £10 if you have to buy the expensive stuff and have a gas guzzler, so £20 for a night out, if you don't drink. Sounds like they are inviting partners, could you take a friend and split the hotel?

Work Xmas parties are horrible, so this gives you the perfect excuse not to go!

Don't they pay for your hotel? Mine do whenever we have a work event.

Believe it or not, some employers don't even pay for the party, let alone accommodation to stay over afterwards.

Tell them the truth. If theu feel bad they should.

Wow this sounds absolutely horrendous!!! Enforced girly getting ready together?