When did you know you were ready for baby no2?

[Glitterbaba]

Since the day DS was born 11 months ago I have wanted another baby .I am still desperately broody and think of baby no2 each day.

I promised myself I’d lose pregnancy weight , get back to work and then evaluate if I was still broody when DS was 1.
Im back at work ( hate it !) and lost the 4 stone (just !) and I’m still desperate for another baby .

When did you know you were ready for baby 2 ?

The only reason I’m hesitant about baby 2 on hold is I am worried about my new employers reaction , worry about being pregnant whilst having a toddler and know 2 under 2 will cost a lot at nursery ! But really I don’t think these problems will lessen if I wait 6 more months!!! Or another year .

We always planned for a 2 year gap between our first two children, and when the time came around that still felt right. We will have 2 in paid nursery for one year, and it is going to be extremely tight financially...but I feel like it will be worth it to have two siblings close in age. We wanted to try and keep going with the nappies and bad sleep while we were already in the thick of it 😂 may as well get it all out of the way!

@Numbat2022

I work 28 hours over 3 long days . MIL has baby 1 day . So we pay for nursery 2 days a week which with the government scheme is just under £400 a month .

So if MIL had baby and toddler one day a week and I paid for 2 to go to nursery 2 days a week - nursery would Cost around £800 pcm. I clear about £1,700-
so would leave me about 900pcm to put in pot .

I say me but I mean me and DH as we share . But trying to show it is worth me working as I will earn an income even once nursery is paid ( I’d love to stay at home )

DH clears about 2,900. So we would have about £3,800 left once I added in £900. That’s for everything .

We don’t live extravagantly. No cars on finance . Small house so smallish mortgage. But I do worry with house hold bills going up .

Also , MIL might not be able to cope with baby and a toddler - so might need to think of sending one of the children an extra day a week which would be about £200 pcm extra . So we would have £3,600 pcm for everything.

Took 2 years to conceive dc1. We unintentionally fell pregnant with dc2 & I found out I was pregnant at dc1s first birthday. Its been a great addition and completed and fulfilled us all as a family unit, the age gap is great (20 months). I am a sahm so don't have childcare costs but I think if you want more then one child and you're keen I would totally endorse doing it sooner rather then later. No sibling rivalry (yet) as dc1 doesn't remember a time without dc2. Good luck!

I didn't. Baby No2 was a surprise. They arrived when their sibling was 12months old. It was very hard but I wouldn't go back and change anything. Okay, maybe the PND but otherwise, the age gap I have now with my 6 & 7 year old is perfect.

Baby 2, literally slipped into 1s routine. From nappy changes to naps, feeding and bedtime. I synced everything.

As for the financial side of things, neither went to nursery until they were 3 and got their funded hours. Ive never been a career woman, so I've always worked around them (evenings/weekends) If I had two times nursery fees, I'd have been more careful 😄

You'll still be broody in 12 months time and I'll go so fast, always does. 😊

@wannabeamummysobad
ive always felt guilty and not good enough ! So I thought i was being reckless wanting another baby so soon. I thought I should wait .

I remember MIL once saying that 2 babies quickly kill a marriage. So I became paranoid what she would think !!!!!!

I am so worried my new job will be so cross at me going off so quickly ! Worried staff will think I have a cheek getting pregnant after just joining . I am so worried they will begrudge me and it will be s stressful pregnancy as they will be annoyed with me .

Then I worry - will my Husband be exhausted and we are then super stretched financially and it will all be my doing.

I think I project my own Insecurities onto others ! I don’t know . I’ve always felt I’ve done what I should do and not what I want to do . But I’m so desperate for a baby / I don’t know who I am really trying to please by holding out. Who is judging me???? Only me .

my dc1 is 5 months old. I’ve said for a while I’d like about 20-26 month gap so that after Mat leave 2 dc1 gets free hours so then on my return to work I just mainly have the new baby’s fees. I also like the idea of getting 2 years off with dc1. But then maybe this is unfair to baby? And maybe posters here are right dc1 will go to nursery in April so would have a year of nursery then I’d be taking him out or could maybe do 1 session a week if we can afford it. Maybe that’s not fair?
then the other part of me thinks should I be having a much bigger gap so I get one on one time with baby like I have with dc1?! 😭

We wanted them close together. We did some sums and worked out the earliest we could afford another. If I conceived when DD was 15 months then by the time I was returning from maternity leave then she would qualify for the 30 free hours. So that's what we did, I have nearly exactly 2 years between them and it's great. They are 4 and 6 now, are best friends.

I wanted mine close together, so started trying when DS was 7 months old. He was 17 months old when DD was born.

We decided when DD was almost 3 that we’d try for a second when she was 3.5 years. However after having a bad pregnancy, horrific labour and at that point, a child who still didn’t sleep through, I wasn’t thrilled about it 😂. As it happened, covid hit and there was NO WAY IN HELL I was getting pregnant during a pandemic. A year after that I realized I was almost 40 and that’s why I now have a baby 😂

When I got a proper reliable nights sleep every night. Age 3

I knew I wanted another right away. I wanted around 3yr age gap. I don't think there was anything in particular that made me feel ready. We got pregnant very quickly second time and we ended up with 2.5 yr age gap. By time I went bk to work she was getting funding but I kept her in a day during my Mat leave to keep her place.

Don't worry about a new employer you never know how long these things take. For all they know u cld have been trying a while. My friend started a new job and found out she was unexpectedly pregnant. She was very embarrassed about it (no need). It was absolutely fine and she came back from mat leave and stayed in the job for a gd few years.

I wanted my eldest to be 3 by the time I'd send the second one to nursery so I started trying when my eldest was about 18 months. We couldn't have afforded me not ro go back to work or 2 sets of full nursery fees. Took a bit longer the second time and there is abiut 3 years between my 2. Good age gap as the older one is a bit more independent.

I knew I wanted a max 2yr gap between my dc before I even started with baby 1.