Quieter coach on train, shouldn’t it be quiet?

[Seymour5]

Fairly lengthy train journeys recently, we booked the quieter coach well in advance, because we like to read or quietly look at the scenery. On the outward journey there was a man holding various face time conversations quite loudly. The woman sitting in her booked seat next to him was getting really fed up, and eventually moved. The younger guy behind us kept playing bits of music on his phone.

Coming home, the first part of the journey was bliss. We changed trains, and the two passengers behind never stopped yakking loudly. Why would anyone book a seat in a quiet coach only to be noisy? No staff around once the tickets were checked, and we are older and don’t wish to risk a confrontation. Twenty years ago my younger and healthier DH might have said something, but not now.

We didn’t realise it was the quiet carriage until DH went to the toilet and saw the sign but there wasn’t a chance I was going to try and keep my toddler quiet.
She wasn’t shouting and screaming or running down the train, she was well behaved, but she was chatty and wanted to play and I wouldn’t have stopped her to try and appease someone else.

FFS. You're the type of person that causes stress for people who book the quiet carriage for a reason. Yes your DD may not have been disturbing anyone. But your assertion that you wouldn't have tried to stop her screaming and running down the train is typical of selfish behaviour that people are complaining about here. Quiet means quiet talking is fine. Screaming and running about not ok. "appease someone else" - lovely.

And you may not like to try that in Germany. You will be told to stand in the corridor or the gap between the trains.

Well I have told children to be quiet and sit down before. If you won't parent then I'll do it.

I don't think a lot of people are even capable of being quiet anymore.

Read this and weep:

www.jrailpass.com/blog/japan-train-etiquette

"Eating in public or while walking is not a common practice in Japan. You should eat on trains only when taking a long-distance train"

"Never talk on your phone while on the train, unless using the designated phone area of the shinkansen. Silence and use headphones so that your media cannot be heard by others."

"While you may be accustomed to chatting with your traveling companions while using public transportation, this is not the norm in Japan. Loud chatter or other disturbance is considered rude."

I know I sound about 100 years old, but people don’t know how to behave in public any more.

After our tickets were checked, never saw a member of staff! For most of us its just common courtesy. Above every pair of seats there was a sign, it was mentioned in the spiel about the train.

@tulips27 I love your suggestion of a noisy coach! 🥳

She wasn’t loud and she wasn’t stood up. She was being a normal human being - talking, playing with her toys, reading her book etc.

She wasn’t being naughty, she just wasn’t silent. Because it’s not the silent carriage, as much as you may wish it were.

When DID it become apparently socially acceptable to listen to music/watch films etc without headphones on public transport.

No one wants to hear Peppa Pig for example... yet I've been on transport with competing episodes from different families.

I've been put in the quiet coach before without choosing it. Usually when you book there's an option to be in ot bit not one NOT to be

That was fun woth 2 year-old DS. The train was crowded and everyone in the coach hated me

But I think the point is that you got into the quiet coach and then stated:

"DH went to the toilet and saw the sign but there wasn’t a chance I was going to try and keep my toddler quiet"

She wasn’t shouting and screaming or running down the train, she was well behaved, but she was chatty and wanted to play and I wouldn’t have stopped her to try and appease someone else.

Why? You know you're in a quiet carriage yet your family's preferences are put before everyone else in there? Surely if you don't teach children that sometimes you need to be quiet they just grow up to be inconsiderate adults who think their own needs trump everyone elses? It just seems really rude. Well, it doesn't just seem rude. It is rude. It's basically just saying I'll do what I want, screw everyone else. It sounds like it wouldn't fly in Germany and Japan though, where there is more respect for the public.

Exactly this!

I usually find the quiet carriage is ok on commuter trains (you get the odd man who thinks the world will stop turning if he doesn't make his Very Important Call for the whole carriage to hear but it's rare). But any other time, forget it. Non-commuters see no need to even try to be quiet.

This. I take my mouse cancelling headphones everywhere and put white noise on my phone. I can then sit and watch the world go by without having to listen to inconsiderate arseholes playing their phones out loud or shouting at each other when having a conversation.

Whilst mouse cancelling headphones might be quite handy in some situations, I obviously meant to type noise cancelling!

Not sure the behaviour is any better in Germany - I had to tell a German guy off when travelling from Cologne to Brussels for systematically going through every ring tone on this phone. He told me the world didn't revolve around me, but he did stop doing it in the end.

@whatsup00 It’s the quiet carriage, not the silent carriage.

So no, I won’t be keeping her silent.

mouse cancelling headphones

Now those could be an invention!!!

It's possible some people don't realise it's a quiet coach. I got assigned to one once and had no idea! I answered a call and the lady opposite sternly told me it was the quiet coach and I rather sheepishly ended the call and apologised. I think now I'm older I would have handled it differently (she was quite rude about it tbh, I'm sure because I was younger), but she was within her rights to inform me and expect me to step out.

As soon as one person starts making a load of noise others think it's okay to do the same as clearly it isn't observed/they don't know, it's just human nature. Always take headphones or earplugs on a public transport journey, always.

Not sure the behaviour is any better in Germany

it is. I travel on ICE trains a lot. More than a lot. And every time you're in a quiet carriage and someone makes a noise, another passenger will speak up. And if it doesn't stop more than one will. And then it stops.

The only time I've seen it not stop, the conductor told him to move, and the next station, since the chap then started being a bit verbally agressive and shouty, the transport police removed him. Not that it would come to this every time, but it's not beyond the bounds of belief. And for the PP who thinks her child shold be able to do what she likes: over here? you would be told in no uncertain terms that people have paid for quiet seats and to move. And it would be enforced by the conductor.

We were put in the quiet coach on my hen do my friend booked the tickets, she couldn't complete the transaction online so had to call to pay, she got chatting to the lady on the line who even asked why we were travelling. Got on the train to find this member of staff for some unknown reason had sat us in the quiet coach!

i usually book the quiet coach (do a lot of train travel), but rarely is it quiet. I have to say in a lot of trains it is really not made clear - just small stickers or signs. It should be made more obvious as I do think a lot of people don’t realise esp if they don’t travel on train much

It's supposed to be but it rarely is in my experience

DH and I went to sit in a quiet carriage a while back. We quietly walked to a couple of seats and I asked him, “Shall we sit here?” This bloke across the aisle immediately stood up and shouted “No, you WON’T sit there if you’re going to be talking to each other, this is the QUIET carriage. Go somewhere else!” 🙄

I travel on trains a lot and I always thought the quiet carriage just meant you shouldn't use noisy electronic devices or take calls I don't think it means you can't talk and that children have to be silent. I don't sit there on purpose but trains are usually crowded and I have sat there by chance before with my kids. Wouldn't occur to me to stop them talking, it's always adults who spoil the train journeys I've been on, usually by being drunk, not kids chatting and being kids.

I haven't read the full thread, so someone may already have mentioned this, but sometimes when you book a ticket you're assigned a seat on the quiet coach without asking for it. It happened to me when DC was little. A six hour trip to Scotland. We managed to find vacant seats elsewhere but that won't always be possible.

The trouble is that some see 'kids being kids' as letting them blast out whatever they're watching on their screens.

It doesn't bother me much, Years of commuting and the apathy, or resignation, has set in. Headphones help.