That I have a lump in my throat more for the class system than the funeral

[JessicaJoens5]

Sat here with a lump in my throat after watching the funeral but I think it's more to do with realising just how unfair life is and what a lottery life can be.

A lot of people in this country are living on the breadline, children are born into poverty, using food banks, lots of homeless, children moving into hotels whilst their parents wait for a house and so much more. Now this is not a thread to bash the royal family as people but I can't help but feel a bit down at the fact that a lot of their lives are luck - luck to be born into a life of privilege or luck of marrying into it.

Now I'm not saying it's easy to be a royal but I know if I had a choice of choosing to be a person born into privilege with the risk of press following me or another person who is living in a tiny flat or house, struggling to pay bills and having to use food banks whilst working a minimum wage job, I know which one I'd choose.

Not really sure what the aim of this thread is but maybe other people had similar feelings from the funeral?

I thought the funeral was today was absolutely beautiful but I just felt a bit bittersweet afterwards. They all live a life many could only dream of and all down to "luck".
I just see a massive difference between the royal family and someone who has made their riches through hard work

By the end of the day I found myself feeling quite bad about myself - my low salary, the way I dress, the way not that many people care about what I have to say or what I think. Everything basically .

On a more serious note, I am also envious of their extended family and what I imagine must be the support they can give each other.

Crazy I know and I guess comparison is the thief of joy and all of that….

It made me realise there is quite a lot about my own life I need to improve / work on.

But I do agree it is strange that any family should be held in such reverence.

I felt the same , on one side of the news hundreds of dead bodies were being discovered in Ukrainine. People who died long before there time in terror and then dumped in an unmarked grave and then you have the over the top mourning of a very old and privileged lady. Such a contrast based just on fate.

Agree. I watched a documentary on some news programme last week about Madagascar and there were these little children with nothing to eat but cactus flowers which they knew would upset their tummies. It was heartbreaking. i could not get it out of my head for days.

I know what you mean. The conversation I had last night with my DH was about the atrocities being uncovered due to the retreat of Russian occupied Ukraine. I sobbed reading some of the reporting. HMQ was a powerhouse and an unbelievable role model and I have so much respect. But she was one person and the suffering of so many - each one with hopes, drama, quirks, imperfections, joy and sadness - seems lost. My heart breaks for every one of those who suffered an untimely end. I did shed a tear today. A beautiful and loving ceremony but I couldn’t stop thinking about the suffering of the each of those people too - each as important and deserving.

None of them did anything to deserve any of it. They were simply born into this.
It's a bit like how I have no respect for those people who look down on others but have inherited all their wealth.

There is always going to be huge disparity in wealth, as commonly seen among the membership on mumsnet.

@headstone your last sentence summed it all up. It's all fate. Any if us could have been born in a warzone, any of us could have been to a very rich family; life is most definitely a lottery

It’s all subjective isn’t it. Yes, it’s a lot of money but I don’t think we can begrudge a lavish affair for the Queen who’s dedicated her life to duty. The monarchy is a big part of our history and this last week or so has illustrated how many people do want it to continue.

if you had the same debate with a family living in poverty in Sierra Leone I’m sure they’d view what we consider a poor family in our country as lucky and privileged to be born into that family given they’ve got a roof over their heads, access to clean water and access to the NHS.

I can afford a decent lifestyle but it doesn’t stop me wondering how other people that live nearby can afford several fancy holidays each year, private schools and expensive cars. We can all look at others and think they’ve got something better than us, whether it be money, job, family.

Hi, I felt exactly the same today although haven't admitted it so far. The Queen did her duty impeccably and, as you say, I'm not against any of them as people. But the huge excesses, the cost, the hierarchy just leaves a bad taste in my mouth. On the background of energy bill increases, poverty on the rise etc. How can we idolise these people when normal people are working so hard and still struggling. Totally get where you're coming from

@FlyingD yes I have all the respect for Rags to riches stories but I don't see how royal children are any more special than a typical primary child apart from the fact the womb they came out of was a "royal" one

It is a privileged life but I would never want to be a royal.

@Lightningrain but what do you mean the queen dedicating her life to duty? How is that different to an 18 year old signing up to join the army? Or someone training and then being a nurse? Or People who volunteer to go to warzones or countries in poverty to help?

How does it differ apart from money?

If the people it’s ‘taken from’ (I don’t think we are suggesting robbery at gunpoint, more better taxation?) still have plenty to live a comfortable life then why is it unfair? We could take millions from the royal family and similar wothoy5 any 8m pact in their lifestyle.

I was born into a wealthy family. Huge house.. multiple holidays a year. studied hard.. uni.. good job.

I still ended up homeless with my young daughter. 4 years of moving between hostels and temporary “homes”. We have a home now but it’s small and shabby and in comparison to my siblings (that my family brought for them)… it’s grim.

Yes us adults to should take responsibility but many don't and have children even when they can't provide the child an adequate life.

this is the bit I have an issue with I guess. While society is to blame to some degree, if adults are bringing children in to a life of abuse, crime and neglect to the point that these poor children are already on a losing streak in life then that shouldn’t happen. People should only have children when they’re in a stable position to do so and should take more responsibility for their choices IMO.

@ShirleyPhallus yes but my point is a lot of children are born into these lives despite us wanting certain adults to take responsibility. The children have no choice of the life their born into

People CAN rise above poverty.
It takes energy and effort, but really is do- able.
The children of parents who can’t be arsed are those I feel for, not encouraged to do well at school, but who are left without chances.
Sadly “ Good” schools tend to be in more middle class areas, where property is expensive .

For me, it's why supposedly rational, free thinking people seem to accept that there is a family out there who are better than they, simply because of their birth.

But fair play to James I and his divine right of Kings. Didn't quite pay off for the first Charles , but something in it still seems to resonate.

Even taking all the republican vs monarchy arguments out of it, WHY do people look up the royal family? All that bollocks about service and duty. I have friends who are teachers, nurses, midwives and vicars. People who have devoted their lives to looking after children with disabilities. No one gives them special treatment for their lives of service and duty.

Totally agree Op.

Do people hold the royal family in reverence though?

I keep seeing reference to this and another poster above has said 'idolise' in respect of what she thinks people feel

I personally enjoyed the information, facts and traditions and culture that I saw today. It doesnt make me hold anyone in reverence, its the role really rather than the person

However, if they arent around and its some other system, like god forbid a Trump style figure, there would still be problems with inequality. He is a good example ot use, his money virtually bought him the position of president.

@Foldingchair yes exactly! Even people who work in supermarkets, factories, lorry drivers etc. Most Jobs are needed and most people within these jobs are providing services. Most people can't retire early and most people do live a life of service but for far less.money and probably far more stress

I think it's easy to fall into the trap of wanting things that aren't real though. Being blessed by the Archbishop doesn't make a material difference to Charlotte's happiness.

I don't like it when people are poor, and even less so do I like feeling poor myself. But I try and limit envy to the things that actually matter, like access to medical treatment, not whether or not a bloke in a big hat blesses me or mine.

I've felt very odd all day and ended up having a terrible afternoon for other reasons but I was torn as PP have said about liking the pageantry and traditions but feeling s bit sick at the cost and that people are still relying on food banks and likely cold tonight.
I don't even know what im trying to say
My DH turned it off as I was watching, furious at the cost and very anti royal but then he conceded he'd have accepted it more today had the Tories not been in power

Same.