Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Help! My kids are sick at least once a month? Is this normal!?

52 replies

pandemicparenting · 19/09/2022 08:03

Hey,
I need help! My kids, aged 2 and 4 are constantly sick, like at least every month!
Its either a cold, stomach bug, flu and the latest this week is a temperature with a very mild head cold, no other symptoms. Other than the temperature they’re fine. I have a temperature too, My husband and I end up getting whatever they do.
It’s seriously affecting our work and life, we are constantly cancelling things and having to miss work.
I asked my doctor about it last Winter and they said it’s normal for kids to get infections up to 12 times a year so I suppose this works out at once a month.
however it just seems excessive lately. They had a vomiting bug in mid August, a cough cold first week of September and now two weeks later some other virus.
can I ask is it the same for everyone else? Is this normal? They are constantly missing school, and It seems like every second week I’m missing work, which is causing a struggle.

AIBU (no it’s normal) or AINBU (its abnormal)

OP posts:
IceStationZebra · 19/09/2022 08:13

That seems a bit more frequent than average but yeah, toddlers and preschoolers are ill a lot. Mine was bad for the first six months of nursery but has evened out to once every couple of months for a snotty nose/cough and a few times a year for a more severe illness.

AllThatFancyPaintsAsFair · 19/09/2022 08:15

Why are you taking their temperature if they are fine?

I didnt r had a thermometer when my children were young, maybe I'm an outlier but is that usual?

WineIsMyMainVice · 19/09/2022 08:17

Do they take a multi vitamin?

some of those things don’t sound like they are too bad or bad enough to keep them off school…?

GoneWithTheWine1 · 19/09/2022 08:19

Why are you keeping them off for a cold? YABU.

AliceW89 · 19/09/2022 08:20

We’ve had a horrendous time of it recently, after a relatively easy first year at nursery bug wise! Since March it feels like it’s been one cold/cough after another for 2.5 yo DS (and subsequently us). It probably is once or so a month. I think it’s unfortunate but not indicative of any underlying issue. Most of my antenatal friends and their DC are permanently a bit under the weather with something. It seems to be par for the course of using childcare.

Original poster
pandemicparenting · 19/09/2022 08:23

Because they were hot and I could feel their forehead burning up! 🤷‍♀️

OP posts:
AliceW89 · 19/09/2022 08:23

They are constantly missing school, and It seems like every second week I’m missing work, which is causing a struggle

Also, w.r.t this…unless DS is properly febrile and poorly with it, or vomiting/diarrhoea…he goes into childcare and we let them call us. Inevitably he’s okay after the first hour or so. They might say he’s not had the best day, but he’d barely be in if we kept him off at the first sign of anything.

Original poster
pandemicparenting · 19/09/2022 08:24

AllThatFancyPaintsAsFair · 19/09/2022 08:15

Why are you taking their temperature if they are fine?

I didnt r had a thermometer when my children were young, maybe I'm an outlier but is that usual?

Because they were hot and burning up when I touched their foreheads! 🤷‍♀️

OP posts:
megletthesecond · 19/09/2022 08:27

It can be like that when they're little. It was awful. I had to give up most things for that period of time. I just about clung onto my job.
It got better when they were both at school as they'd had every germ going by then.

bob78 · 19/09/2022 08:27

I would say it's about right for a 2 year old acclimatising to nursery, but does seem more frequent for a 4 year old- that said, at that age it must be a new school, new environment so new germs etc? Did he/she go to nursery prior to school?

I don't think I'd worry too much yet, but if it's like it again next autumn I'd be more concerned.

AllThatFancyPaintsAsFair · 19/09/2022 08:28

pandemicparenting · 19/09/2022 08:24

Because they were hot and burning up when I touched their foreheads! 🤷‍♀️

Show quote history

So don't you ive them one calpol and send them off to school? Children don't stay at home with colds ime

Maybe I'm misunderstanding but you seem to be saying that you are keeing them off school when they are fine

Pigsinmuck · 19/09/2022 08:30

My DS did his first year in reception last year without a single day of sick. So I would say it’s not normal for a 4 year old to be missing school regularly with illness.

justasking111 · 19/09/2022 08:30

Do they go to soft play type places. I can guarantee mine will catch something every time when they do

Tirnanogg · 19/09/2022 08:34

Mine are 4&5, and exactly the same. We've just come off a full week of high temperatures, and we had two rounds of COVID and two lots of vomiting bugs in the spring/summer terms, in addition to the normal colds (and school policy was not to send in with a cold due to COVID risk).

I'm self employed with a flexible schedule, and chose not to apply for better paid, more reliable work because of how often I would have to be off with sick children! From the parent chat group though, it looks like the rest of the class is just as susceptible.

QueenofLouisiana · 19/09/2022 08:35

I think that they do get lots of bugs when they are little, this would be pushed back age-wise at the moment as there were a lot of mitigations in place against covid, which also stopped the transmission of other illnesses. Now there are fewer mitigations, the germs will spread more freely again.

Timeforabiscuit · 19/09/2022 08:35

Sounds on high end of normal, alot of exposure to normal childhood illness would have reduced because of covid infection prevention, so you're kids might be getting a double whammy to catchup.

It's awful at the time, I was wondering why on earth I was bothering with nursery fees when they spent so much time ill. But by the time they got to year 1 of primary they were rarely ill.

GoneWithTheWine1 · 19/09/2022 08:35

So why not just give them calpol? Sorry I don't understand, I'm surprised the school hasn't pulled you over their attendance. If I stopped my kids going to school everytime they had a cold they'd barely be there either. It's just insane.

3WildOnes · 19/09/2022 08:37

A lot more than my children. I would say mine miss school or nursery 1-2 times on average per year. There have been some years they haven't been ill at all.

How are their diets?

TheRookie · 19/09/2022 08:37

AllThatFancyPaintsAsFair · 19/09/2022 08:28

So don't you ive them one calpol and send them off to school? Children don't stay at home with colds ime

Maybe I'm misunderstanding but you seem to be saying that you are keeing them off school when they are fine

Show quote history

Schools and nursery round here have a policy of if they need calpol, they're too unwell to go in. I wouldn't send my kids if they had a fever! Not fair to my kids or the nursery !

I do send them with mild cold symptoms now though. My lot have had the mild cold and high temp thing this weekend too, very odd! Seem better this morning.

Rutland2022 · 19/09/2022 08:40

DD is 3 and rarely manages a full month at nursery, we both used 100% of our annual leave on illness last year.

I don’t think those with older children realise how strict nurseries have been (and still are!) with Covid. We can’t send them in with temperatures and they aren’t allowing Calpol routinely either.

SpotOnMyBot · 19/09/2022 08:40

Mine were like that at that age. I don't think it's abnormal and you're right, you shouldn't send them in with a temperature!

I nearly gave up work it was so awful but it does get better. What made a big difference was my daughter having her tonsils out!

Wouldloveanother · 19/09/2022 08:41

AliceW89 · 19/09/2022 08:23

They are constantly missing school, and It seems like every second week I’m missing work, which is causing a struggle

Also, w.r.t this…unless DS is properly febrile and poorly with it, or vomiting/diarrhoea…he goes into childcare and we let them call us. Inevitably he’s okay after the first hour or so. They might say he’s not had the best day, but he’d barely be in if we kept him off at the first sign of anything.

That’s really selfish. What about the other kids?

Goldencarp · 19/09/2022 08:45

I’d try a multi vitamin maybe. We’ve been lucky in that my 3 are rarely Ill and the youngest now year 11 has never missed a day of school for illness ever. They’ve all had the odd cold though. Im not sure if it’s genetics or what but I’m rarely ill either. I get a cold every few years which is short lived.

AliceW89 · 19/09/2022 08:47

Wouldloveanother · 19/09/2022 08:41

That’s really selfish. What about the other kids?

Show quote history

I mean, this is literally nurseries policy, so no I’m not being selfish. They are happy to take DC and see how they go and let the parents know if they aren’t up for it. Diarrhoea/vomiting/temperature >39 has to stay at home, which we follow to the letter. As others have said, school and work are expected to continue as normal even if you are a bit under the weather. I’d be out of a job if I was off every time I had a snotty nose. Why should nursery be different?

blebbleb · 19/09/2022 08:49

My 2 year old seems to catch everything going. He gets ill every 6 weeks or so. I send him in to the childminder unless he is very grumpy or seems to unwell. If it's just a sniffle I'll send him in. I feel a bit bad sometimes but we can't afford to take leave at every sniffle.

Swipe left for the next trending thread