To be annoyed that they won’t take this seriously? (Health of 72 year old)

[FluffyYellow]

My stepfather is 72. For the past few months he has been suffering from a barking cough and constant headaches to the point where he’s spending all morning/afternoon in bed which is out of character for him. He won’t see a GP. My mum half heartedly calls the GP to make him an appointment but gives up as soon as they say they’re too busy.

The other day he was at my house and I noticed the front of his trousers were clearly wet. It looked like he had wet himself but not noticed. I confided in another family member and they said they thought he had wet himself a few times when they had seen him.

They’re bungalow is starting to really smell strongly of mould and stale urine.

My mum is extremely defensive and saying anything will likely erupt in an argument, especially if I bring up the urine issue.

Is it worth the fall out? Would you say something? It will cause great upset.

(name changed as outing)

Yes, I would say something. He sounds unwell and he needs help. Your mum us in denial. I'd be tempted to call the GP myself.

I'd definitely mention the smell and that you've noticed he wets himself.
At the very least, they could buy incontinence pouches/pads/pants.

If you do say something, stick to the facts like a stuck record. Don't get pulled into an argument.

You can’t force someone to seek medical attention unfortunately. If your DM isn’t tech savvy you, with his permission, could do an EConsult for him, that will likely result in a GP contacting him and booking an appointment, easier to do than hang on the phone all morning, only to be told the appointments are all gone.

They do tend to close the EConsult lists when their set amount they can deal with is reached but then it reopens each day.

Keep trying but you can't force someone to see their gp.