To be irritated with OH?

[Humffff]

He has a habit of doing this so it isn't the first time, that's probably why I'm so irritated.

Our older DC has outgrown the double buggy so we need to switch to a single for the baby. We came across a lovely stroller outside a charity shop we were passing yesterday, it was in brand new condition and had all of the accessories with it for just £30.

I said I was going to buy it, OH goes into a speech about how it isn't convenient to buy it now, it'll be a nuisance to push back along with the double, we should really wait, he'd prefer we don't get it etc.

He made me feel like I was being such an inconvenience for wanting to get it (out of my personal spends i might add) so I just left it for the sake of avoiding him moaning.

I kicked myself afterwards and went back for it today despite more objections from him. It had gone.

AIBU to be annoyed at him aswell as myself?

Things like this happen often. I want to buy something we need, he tries to talk me out of it. I'm good with money and don't spend frivolously.

Yes, that would annoy me. This is why we've always had our own accounts and money as well as a joint account for bills- we can each just buy a certain amount of things without the other person moaning about it or going "How much??" If something cost £30 and I'd be using it more than DH I'd just go and get it. It's quite easy to get cheap second hand buggies though - have a look on a local FB group.

In these instances you should just say "I'm going in to buy that." Don't give any hint that you're asking his opinion. If he complains or talks it won't matter because you've already walked inside and can just ignore him.

I know it can be hard to feel you're free to spend without asking. I hated it. Now that I work I don't ask. I just buy. It's no one else's business. Try and stop yourself from opening up discussions which he will interpret as asking permission. Just silently buy the thing and feel happy.

Dh has done this a couple of times. We needed a new vacuum cleaner and I has seen the one I wanted. A Miele and 2000 Watts. Rely good suction and recommended by a friend. A shop near where I worked. We ended up in a different shop in a town where dh worked. Against my better judgement I bought a miele cleaner but not the model I wanted. Not as good suction but still OK. When I was buying my last washing machine I made sure I bought what I wanted. I have learned my lesson. Tbf he will vacuum but is clueless when it comes to the laundry.

Take him to look at buggys and let him see how much money you would have saved and maybe make him purchase the new one and you can make a contribution of £30

DH steered me towards getting a mountain bike when I was looking at hybrids. Had the mountain bike for more than ten years and thought I was just getting older and heavier and that's why I found cycling so hard and constantly had a sore bum and backache when I cycled. Until at last I decided to change my bike and completely choose one myself - a nice light Dawes hybrid. Suddenly it was all so much easier and I had none of the problems I'd been having before.

The scales definitely fell then to show that DH is an absolute expert at mainsplaining and holding forth confidently on many areas he knows very little about. Next thing I bought a car without asking him anything about it- I showed him and he was really negative, and it really killed my buzz about it. Of course, once I got the car he loved it and was always driving it, and has always bought that make since as he loves them.

How's it a hassle to push two pushchairs if there are two adults there?

You should've said it's fine you'll just donate the double while you're there if he carried on being a dick.

You should've said it's fine you'll just donate the double while you're there if he carried on being a dick.

was going to suggest that, it's what we did and it was bought before I'd even left the shop (so i showed her how to fold it, just to be sure)

Perhaps he'd like to take responsibility for finding the replacement buggy, and paying for it.

Yeah, he's annoying, but you can only solve this by working on yourself. I capitulate too - but am learning not to more and more.

Wasn't convenient for him, so now you are massively inconvenienced have to find something else, or new etc. Because he was selfish and lazy. Why are you paying for joint expenses like a buggy anyway?