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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Partner hasn't turned up to meet me, would you be annoyed?

26 replies

Letsdancedavidbowie · 14/09/2022 20:12

It's a hobby I do that he sometimes does too. I invited him to join me today as usually he's working, and he said he'd come.
It's £10 a session (pricey I know so I don't do it that often) and I paid his entry.

Today arrives and he texts me beforehand asking for the time and place of the event. He says he's on his friend's phone as his is out of battery.
I tell him with plenty of notice where and when it is, with very clear directions, and he says yeah I know the area.
He would've probably been about 10 mins late but it's a 2 hour event so it's no biggie.
Anyway the event ends in 15 minutes, he just hasn't turned up, but is online and has just liked something I've posted so obviously he is not in danger or anything.
He didn't even tell me he wasn't coming, I've been waiting for him and told the host he was coming.

Even prior to the event i said don't worry if you'll struggle to make it, and he insisted he would come.

He's not done this before, I'm embarrassed and hurt. What would you say or think?

OP posts:
Letsdancedavidbowie · 14/09/2022 20:13

The fact that he's got the cheek to like my pictures but not even explain why he hasn't shown up?

OP posts:
ParentallyUnprepared · 14/09/2022 20:15

That's awful. How long have you been together and how is your relationship normally?

Letsdancedavidbowie · 14/09/2022 20:15

Sorry he's just texted saying he couldn't find it and went home

OP posts:
Cindie943811A · 14/09/2022 20:18

Why didn’t he contact you for more directions? Sounds like a rather weak excuse

Slinkyminky22 · 14/09/2022 20:19

Surely he would have phoned or texted you when he couldn't find it? For directions?

Letsdancedavidbowie · 14/09/2022 20:20

He didn't have any battery apparently

OP posts:
RunningFromInsanity · 14/09/2022 20:20

Sounds like he owes you £10

WeeOrcadian · 14/09/2022 20:21

Letsdancedavidbowie · 14/09/2022 20:20

He didn't have any battery apparently

So how was he online?

girlmom21 · 14/09/2022 20:22

@WeeOrcadian presumably he went home then charged his phone

Elieza · 14/09/2022 20:22

He sounds like a bit of an arse tbh. If he didn’t want to go he should have said. Not fake some crap about not being able to find the venue.

Sandra1984 · 14/09/2022 20:23

Letsdancedavidbowie · 14/09/2022 20:20

He didn't have any battery apparently

He had enough battery to post the likes… just not to let you know he was not going to make it? Personally I don’t put up with that type of behaviour in a man but that’s just me.

dotdotdotdash · 14/09/2022 20:24

Why did you pay his entry fee?

decayingmatter · 14/09/2022 20:28

That is so fucking rude and weird of him. Normal, reasonable people just don't behave like that.

Relocatiorelocation · 14/09/2022 20:32

Is the place really hard to find, could he be telling the truth? How long are you with him now?

Lcb123 · 14/09/2022 20:47

If it’s the first time he’s done this, I’m inclined to believe him that he couldn’t find it and didn’t have battery to call? I’d start from a point of believing him unless this is common for him

Ottersmith · 14/09/2022 20:47

You should have gone and done the activity yourself though and not waited for him. Why did you martyr yourself by doing that? Next time I wouldn't pay him in and carry on like he's going to be flaky.

2Hot2Handle · 14/09/2022 21:15

Very strange behaviour. Even if it was the case that he ran out of battery and couldn’t find the place, surely he should have called you the moment he was in and had plugged his phone in to charge? Not like your pictures without contacting you. Red flag!

tickticksnooze · 14/09/2022 21:18

He sounds like a dick. It's a lazy and implausible lie.

nachoavocado · 14/09/2022 21:21

How long have you been with him? I'd ditch him.

Pinkflipflop85 · 14/09/2022 21:27

He had a better offer and is making up lame excuses.

HoneyIShrunkThePizza · 14/09/2022 21:28

The hobby thing is flaky and annoying but the blatant lying is grounds for dismissal 🚪

AnneLovesGilbert · 14/09/2022 21:29

What a dick. Sorry OP, I’d feel the same.

Aquamarine1029 · 14/09/2022 21:30

He couldn't find it? That's the story he's going with?

Dacadactyl · 14/09/2022 21:33

First up, I'd have asked for my money back at the venue.

Then I'd go home and tell him that I was annoyed he didn't turn up and see how he reacts.

FOJN · 14/09/2022 21:34

Even if he is telling the truth about not being able to find the venue and having no battery it's very odd that he didn't text and apologise for the no show as soon as he had some charge.

I'm afraid it's all a bit weird and I think he's probably lying so I'd be pissed off too. If you've haven't been together long I'd ditch him, this sort of flaky behaviour won't improve with time.