15 years ago I worked in an infant school. At the time I was a single parent to a then 5 year old DS who attended the school. Whilst working there I struck up a friendship with a TA that worked in the classrooms. She was 15 years older than me. During our friendship her marriage broke down. She said that her ex husband was abusive, coercive and financially abusive to her. Myself and several colleagues rallied around her and helped her to set up a new home in a flat. Colleagues (who were her friends) helped to furnish her home, lent her money, decorated, the whole shebang.
I was not in a position to help financially but I did have an extra SIM card and old phone that I let her use. She could not get a phone contract because of debts (as a result of the financial abuse apparently). She set up a standing order to pay me the £10 for the sim and I gifted her the old phone. The first 3 months the standing order came out no problem. By the 4th month I received a phone bill of £50. I contacted her immediately and asked her to pay the extra. She promised she would but did not transfer it. This ended up taking me over my overdraft, spiralling with bank charges that all told equalled that she owed me about £100. Cue lots of ignored calls (over the six week holiday).
When we returned to work she was awful to me. Ignoring me, refusing to make me cups of tea on the tea runs, wouldn’t talk to me on break duties. Really childish but unpleasant behaviour and needless to say never paid me. This went on for weeks and I didn’t want to make a fuss as I recognised that I was stupid for trusting her and it wasn’t the head teachers problem as it was a personal agreement gone wrong. To be fair, despite having no money, I could of forgiven not paying me, but the silent treatment and unpleasant behaviour upset me. Anyway, within a couple of months of being back she had gone off on long term sick. It then transpired that she had not paid back the other teachers money and had sold items gifted to her from others and had generally upset everyone. She did not return to work and I left at the end of that year along with some other staff.
Fast forward 15 years. I am no longer a single parent and I have more children, one of whom has just started junior school. Imagine my horror when I went to collect him today and who should be his new classroom assistant but her! It made me really upset. Maybe I’m being silly, but it upset me. I obviously have not said a word to my child. I’m just fuming that this woman is responsible for my child throughout the school day. She has no morals, and is a bully. I know I can’t say anything and I would never let on to DS that I even know her but aibu to be silently fuming. She definitely recognised me today. She maybe didn’t make the connection with my child as I am now married and have changed my name. Awkward!