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AIBU?

What time frame would you give someone before texting them to ask if they’re running late?

20 replies

afterthenightday · 13/09/2022 21:55

Is 6 minutes an unreasonable amount of time?

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

AIBU

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yonce · 13/09/2022 22:00

Running late to what? Their own wedding - 1 minute. A cinema slot - 10 minutes. A pre booked table for a meal - 5 minutes.

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Shortname · 13/09/2022 22:00

Depends on context, where are we meeting and what for? Ie giving them a lift to the station yea 6 mins is really late. Coming round for dinner 6 mins wouldn't even register as late.

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nachoavocado · 13/09/2022 22:01

About 15 mins?

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Castaspell · 13/09/2022 22:10

Depends on the urgency of the meeting time I guess.

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afterthenightday · 13/09/2022 22:23

Shortname · 13/09/2022 22:00

Depends on context, where are we meeting and what for? Ie giving them a lift to the station yea 6 mins is really late. Coming round for dinner 6 mins wouldn't even register as late.

Giving someone a lift but there’s no time restraint for the destination.

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XenoBitch · 13/09/2022 22:24

10 minutes, then I am going back home.

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ForfuckssakeEXHstopbeingatwat · 13/09/2022 22:24

In that scenario, 10 mins before I'd chase up.

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FireSideCat · 13/09/2022 22:25

I would just call them and ask what time they will arrive - no hassle and then you can get on with something else in the extra time you have.

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CallMeLinda · 13/09/2022 22:26

Wouldn't text them at all. If we've arranged a time, and they are not there and have not contacted me to say they are running late, I make other arrangements now. Fed up of people doing this shit a long time ago!

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NoSquirrels · 13/09/2022 22:26

Was your meeting/pick-up time definite e.g. ‘I will be with you at 1pm’ or was it ‘So I’ll come to yours about 1ish’?

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SpringIntoChaos · 13/09/2022 22:27

Context is everything!

A train/bus? 19 minutes BEFORE it was due!

The cinema? 5 minutes before I was about to go inside.

An important meeting...a minute or two after it was due to start (if I was feeling generous!)

A catch up with a friend? 30 minutes after we were supposed to meet.

A first date? 10 minutes...I'm not that desperate 😆

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SpringIntoChaos · 13/09/2022 22:27

*train/bus should say 10 mins

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MichaelAndEagle · 13/09/2022 22:28

15 minutes.
But I'd want to text after 5 minutes. I hate being kept waiting.

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BringItBackBruno · 13/09/2022 22:44

10 minutes but I'd be irritated after 5.

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TrashyPanda · 13/09/2022 22:50

You are doing them a favour, so if they are going to be late, they need to text you asap. So if they get a flat tire, they text there and then. It’s not hard. It’s basic consideration

it’s incredibly rude of the person to assume their wants are paramount.

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HarryDresdensLeatherDuster · 13/09/2022 22:51

Same situation recently (with a slight time restraint) and I waited 50 minutes before messaging. Shit happens to us all!

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MsFogi · 13/09/2022 22:53

I'm not sure when I would text. But I do know that I leave if someone is more than 15 minutes late.

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Kite22 · 13/09/2022 22:53

Context is everything.
It also depends if the person doing the favour (ie the driving) is the one who is late, or the one who is receiving the favour (ie getting a lift) is the one who is late.

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Pleasecouldihavesomeadvice · 13/09/2022 22:58

As you are doing then a favour, I would text then when you arrive. Call after 5 mins

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NoSquirrels · 13/09/2022 23:08

OP, were you receiving the favour (getting a lift) and were late, so they texted you you after 6 minutes?

Or were you the one doing the favour (giving a lift), and you texted the late person?

It’s not unreasonable of someone doing a favour to text if the other person is late. In that scenario, the onus is on the late person to update about their arrival time.

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