AIBU?
To think they mean to complain?
TPL · 12/09/2022 13:36
My DP suffers from sciatica. He gets flare ups which come and go. He can be fine for months but then the pain comes back. He has been to the hospital with it but they just recommended exercises and painkillers.
At the moment he is in a bit of pain which is affecting how he walks. He works in a school but is employed by a company who the school have a contract with. A complaint has been made by some members if the school staff about the way he is walking (with a slight hunch). He has been able to carry out his work as normal. The complaint was not made out of concern as DP heard the staff members complaining.
Aibu to think it is petty and mean to complain about this? I would understand if he was unable to do his job properly.
Am I being unreasonable?
AIBUYou have one vote. All votes are anonymous.
OldEvilOwl · 12/09/2022 13:38
Who are they complaining to? Sounds very nasty and un-necessary
Samcro · 12/09/2022 13:38
how can someone complain about that? what if he was disabled.
Electricstar · 12/09/2022 13:39
YANBU! Completely disgusting that they complained about this
MessyBunPersonified · 12/09/2022 13:41
It would be very weird for one person to complain that someone was walking
MessyBunPersonified · 12/09/2022 13:41
Oops pressed too soon.
It would be odd for one person to make that complaint, let alone several.
Are you sure ut isn't affecting his work too?
Soubriquet · 12/09/2022 13:42
What is the actual complaint?
”I don’t like the way bob is walking! Do something about it”
Bonkers
TPL · 12/09/2022 13:42
They complained to his immediate manager. He has to go to the doctor and now get a fit to work note. We are a low income family so not what we need. The only benefit is that maybe his doctor can give him some help. His job is manual so I understand if they have concerns about him doing his job but DP just gets on with what he is asked to do. It's frustrating as it is not a constant issue.
GiltEdges · 12/09/2022 13:43
I mean you’d have to be a complete arsehole to complain about someone purely because of the way they walk. I’m struggling to imagine anyone could have so little self awareness, so my presumption is there has to be more to this…
TPL · 12/09/2022 13:45
I believe it was 2 members of staff in the office who complained. I don't think it is about his actual work as he gets jobs sent through to him and they are very quick to say if jobs are not completed correctly or quickly enough.
ScottishLavender · 12/09/2022 13:45
They can't complain about someone having a health problem or disability!
Starlightstarbright1 · 12/09/2022 13:46
Is it a complaint or a concern.....
They may be concerned he isn't taking care of himself and potentially injuring himself which would be an issue
GreenManalishi · 12/09/2022 13:47
I'd be more concerned that someone actually took the complaint seriously and thought it was reasonable to pass it on to your DH rather than to tell the members of staff they were being ridiculous to complain because they don't like the way he walks.
TPL · 12/09/2022 13:48
Funnily enough or maybe not I have had this happen to me also in a former retail job. I had a bad ankle but still worked as shop was understaffed. A customer asked me to show her where a product was. As I was leading her there she asked why I was walking funny. I just mumbled sorry to her.
Howardsbend · 12/09/2022 13:49
I think it's highly likely that they inquired out of concern, don't you? Far more likely than someone complaining about his walk!
cava14una · 12/09/2022 13:49
As a sciatica sufferer he has my sympathy! When I get a flare up it's unbelievably painful. I have been left with a dropped foot which makes me walk with a bit of a lurch as I have to be careful my foot doesn't catch, leading to a fall. I've had a few nasty falls.
He won't be able to help how he walks. They are being absolutely ridiculous and very unkind.
Hugasauras · 12/09/2022 13:50
Surely it wasn't a complaint but more a concern? If he looked like he was struggling with parts of the job they might have wanted to make sure he was okay and not being sent on inappropriate jobs? I doubt anyone would complain just because of the way his walking looks.
TPL · 12/09/2022 13:52
DP is adamant it was a complaint and not one of concern. I obviously wasn't there so didn't hear the exact words.
Icanstillrecallourlastsummer · 12/09/2022 13:52
Do you not think that they raised a concern? Or perhaps complained that, as they saw it, the company made him work even if he wasn't in a fit state to? that sounds far more likely than "I don't like the way bob walks"
Vapeyvapevape · 12/09/2022 13:53
If they were concerned, why didn't they ask him if he was ok , rather than making a complaint.
TPL · 12/09/2022 13:56
From what I have been told in the past I think there is a bit of an "them and us" attitude from some of the school staff. As the school pay the company DP works for it makes the school customers and so gives them the right to complain. I think it would be different if my DP worked directly for the school as they would all be colleagues.
Icanstillrecallourlastsummer · 12/09/2022 13:58
Vapeyvapevape · 12/09/2022 13:53
If they were concerned, why didn't they ask him if he was ok , rather than making a complaint.
Maybe there are more issues with the company not providing services in an appropriate or ethical manner. And then perhaps the concern is twohold (1) is the company pressuing their employees to work when unwell (directly or indirectly through low pay, poor sick pay, harch sickness policies and) (2) is the school getting the services they pay for if someone is limping around and, possibly, being inefficient. School budgets are stretched, and they have obligations to use ethical companies if they outsource.
Andromachehadabadday · 12/09/2022 14:08
I think something has been lost in translation.
I am guessing they haven’t complained but mentioned it out of concern if it’s really obvious and he looks in pain.
Or they have complained how work takes longer and they have noticed he seems to be in pain.
If someone has complained about the way he walks (which is awful and am hoping it wasn’t true) surely your husbands employer would have shut down and spoken with their senior management.
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