To ask about how you felt when your kids left primary school

[Upthebracket22]

My DD is in her final year of primary and then after 12 years that will be it and I feel really weird about it. It’s been a huge source of community and friendship for me too during that time and I don’t know how I will feel when it’s gone! I know it’s another life stage of which I am used to but it’s the loss of community and friendship that is worrying me I think!

aibu?

I'd gradually wound down my involvement with the school for various reasons anyway (no longer on the PTA after a change of leadership, no longer walking her to school as she was happy to go on her own etc) so it didn't really impact me that much. And as my eldest was already at secondary I had already got used to the lack of community feel there. But I know what you mean, if you are someone who is heavily involved with the primary school it is strange to not have it be part of your life any more.

I felt pleased they were growing up and moving on. However I wasn't involved at all - DP did drop offs and pick up as he was SAHP and I worked outside the home.

Ok with dd1 as dd2 still there but I definitely do feel like I'm going to miss it. I'm far less involved now though. My parent group was with dd1's crew. Once dd2 started I went back to work so I'm never at the school gates anymore and haven't got to know the parents in the same way.

I have three DC and the youngest left primary a year ago. I was heavily involved with the school (on the PTA and a governor at different times), so it was a big thing and I felt quite emotional.

It's funny how quickly you adapt though! I don't miss it at all now. I've kept in touch with the local mums that I wanted to, and I quite like the hands-off approach at secondary school.

Not at all, it’s lovely you’ve had that community and friendship, of course you’re going to miss it even if you still see the friends you’ve made. I wish I felt the same - my oldest child had a hard time at primary school with bullying, and it was a struggle for me to get support for her SEN, and I’ve never really got to know the parents in my younger son’s class.

Relieved
Still see everyone though , you've just got to make the effort to meet up

Well for me it will be a huge relief. Last year and can’t wait - they’ve been rubbish with my child’s sen.

Relieved!
No more standing in the playground in the rain.
Also DC were able to get excited about new subjects as their pushy primary school was so very Maths and English focused.

Fine as I have zero involvement in my child’s school.
(other than patents evening and sports day).

Its still school, just the next stage of misery for child no 1. Child no2 might be a better experience hopefully but in general, it’s just the next phase.

I suppose if you have a deeper connection then it’s going to evoke feelings. So not unreasonable.

I felt so much relief. No more stupid functions, cake sales, fetes. Never having to see the hun mums again. And finally, knowing the little assholes in their classes will finally get punished for their shitty and disruptive behaviour in senior school.

Relief that I didn't have to do school runs any more, sad that they were growing up and excited for the new chapter in their life. I was never overly friendly with any of the other parents so I never really had that "community" feel.

@Upthebracket22 my youngest left first school in July (we still have first/middle/high schools. First school is YR-Y5). Although patents were only allowed back in the building post-Covid at Easter, and my involvement in after school club had stopped because the club folded during Covid, I felt somewhat bereft.

The school is right in the middle of the village and I've had one or other child there for 10 years! I told the head on DD's last day that they'd been such a constant in our lives, for such a long time, that I'd miss them (despite saying many times "I am so over first school!").

Yesterday afternoon I walked past the school and looked in the playground for dd for a second, before I realised she was up the hill at middle school now!

But rather lovely-ly, dm is now volunteering at the school to do reading with KS1.

So no, I don't miss making viking ships out of milk bottles, the expectation that I have all the free time in the world, and the misogynistic songs, but I do miss the wonderful community of dedicated staff that have been so key in raising my children.

I felt very sad, bereft really. Got over it pretty quickly, but still get a little pang if I ever pass the school now.