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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask why a significant amount of home Ed kids are joining school at KS2?

96 replies

Nonunsnonunsnone · 08/09/2022 09:07

This might be area specific but we have had 10 or so kids join my kids school in the last six months who were previously home educated, either completely or since 2020. Being the nosey bitch that I am, I would rather ask MN than ask them directly.
I would have thought that any initial enthusiasm for home education would have been extinguished by the pandemic, it hit immediately.
It doesn't seem to be an easy choice for some (parents crying at the gates with others telling them it does get easier) so is it the economic climate?
FWIW I am not in favour of homeschooling as I don't believe that any of the hippie settings would have picked up on my DC's learning disability and possible autism as she would have just been left to paint all day and 'work at her own level'. I see some children who are homeschooled in my volunteer work who have pretty obvious needs but are just left to be 'wild' or 'free spirited'. I'm never quite sure who is being protected from the real world, the child or the parents.

OP posts:
AmyandPhilipfan · 08/09/2022 09:18

I imagine a lot of parents don't agree with academic work at a young age so send them to school at an age they think is more appropriate for school - which a lot of experts agree is about 7, so the start of Year 3.

Thurlow · 08/09/2022 09:20

I know someone who is going to home ed for the first few years and wants her kids to start school nearer the age they do in some other countries - maybe it’s that?

meditrina · 08/09/2022 09:22

It's probably because of the pandemic - they had then at home, like it, de-regged and carried on.

But found that over time it wasn't for them for whatever reason

So plan return to school for start of Y3 as it's a natural break point between schooling stages (and more possible to win an admissions appeal if the school they want is full)

Dinodigger · 08/09/2022 09:22

We home educated for the early years as imo 4 is far too young to be in school. My 10 year old is sitting her 11 Plus today after deciding to go to school last year. Her ASD and ADHD were diagnosed too whilst she was home educated.

TheYearOfSmallThings · 08/09/2022 09:25

The decision to homeschool is not necessarily a long term plan. Some parents feel their children aren't suited to formal education at 4 years old, but always intend to merge them into primary school in Y3 or Y4 - it seems to work fine, from what I've seen.

TheVanguardSix · 08/09/2022 09:25

I think that the kids who started their education mid pandemic will have had issues around returning to school in ways some of us can’t possibly imagine- mainstream and SEN children.
Educating and raising children in an en environment completely compromised by a pandemic has been a minefield for many families. There was no guidebook for that one, OP.
Also, people gotta work, gotta eat, gotta pay astronomical bills. I imagine loads of SAHPs who were homeschooling no longer can because they have to go to work. And there really aren’t enough special needs schools around.

Ship · 08/09/2022 09:26

I knew a girl in school who didn’t start until year 3. (This is back in the nineties). Her parents wanted her at home in the infants to learn at her own pace presumably like some European countries that did the same. She also didn’t call her parents mum and dad but by their first names which I always found fascinating. She was extremely clever and quite geeky not at all hippy so I suppose it can just be what some parents feel is best for their child.

PeekabooAtTheZoo · 08/09/2022 09:27

"Left to paint all day"? "Hippie settings"?
What a judgemental and goady OP.

Needmorelego · 08/09/2022 09:27

KS2 is age 7 which is when a lot of countries start the formal side of education after Kindergarten. Many parents don't want the formal-ness of KS1 that English schools have.
Interestingly English schools when they first began back in Victorian times 'Standard 1' as it was then called started at age 7. Schools had 'Infants' at age 5-7, sometimes a 'babies' class at age 3/4 but 'proper' school was at age 7.
Your comments about homeschooling being all 'hippie' though is hilarious.

Sunnyqueen · 08/09/2022 09:28

As someone who's never home schooled... You sound like a twat. Hope your not teaching my kids.

Mischance · 08/09/2022 09:29

Home schooling can be excellent if done well, so a blanket judgement seems unreasonable to me.

A lot of parents feel that children in the UK go to school too young - and I agree with that. Home schooling for KS1 and then school from thereon in seems a good compromise to me.

I am of course aware that it is not always easy for the teachers to pick up children at that stage, as they are bound by our rigid curriculum and are having to try and catch them up - I see it is a pain for the teachers, but it is a good decision for many children. They get to enjoy their childhoods and can explore the many facets of being a child without being forced into the NC straitjacket.

Brefugee · 08/09/2022 09:31

FWIW I am not in favour of homeschooling as I don't believe that any of the hippie settings would have picked up on my DC's learning disability and possible autism as she would have just been left to paint all day and 'work at her own level'. I see some children who are homeschooled in my volunteer work who have pretty obvious needs but are just left to be 'wild' or 'free spirited'. I'm never quite sure who is being protected from the real world, the child or the parents.

ah. Those hoiked up your bum-crack judgy-pants will give you thrush, OP.

You might have left your "home schooled" child to finger paint all day, other parents not so much.

There is plenty of evidence that formal schooling for children should start around 7. That is not to say that home-schooled children are fingerpainting lentils all day while staring at rainbows and weaving their own clothes from hemp. If the children are starting school in the year that is appropriate for their age, that is a decision the school makes.

stargirl1701 · 08/09/2022 09:33

Probably based in the evidence from other countries that formal learning is best after 7 years old.

museumum · 08/09/2022 09:33

A lot of the world believe school is not developmentally appropriate at age 4/5.
evidence from other Northern European countries shows that children who don’t learn to read and write till 7, learn very very fast and very soon are not behind those who learn at 4/5.

Tigofigo · 08/09/2022 09:34

FWIW I am not in favour of homeschooling as I don't believe that any of the hippie settings would have picked up on my DC's learning disability and possible autism as she would have just been left to paint all day and 'work at her own level'. I see some children who are homeschooled in my volunteer work who have pretty obvious needs but are just left to be 'wild' or 'free spirited'. I'm never quite sure who is being protected from the real world, the child or the parents.

Wow, this is pretty damning... And inaccurate, in my experience. (I don't home ed but know many families who do)

LOADS of children in school don't have their SEN picked up.

A lot of the time if it is, it's driven by the parent - sometimes being gaslit by schools who deny there's an issue because funding.

Sometimes schools DO pick it up but don't even tell the parents (and don't do anything to help the child).

Lots of the home ed groups are run by ex teachers, who are fully aware of the cohorts' needs - soooo many DC who go from school to home ed do so due to unmet needs leading to poor MH, school refusal, etc. The home ed settings I know are very open about this. Most parents are very grateful there is a place their child can be accepted, content and have better mental health even if they are "just" left to be wild (which is actually quite a natural state for children, certainly more natural than sitting silently in a classroom!)

5zeds · 08/09/2022 09:38

Ah well if your home is a hippie setting where children endlessly stick fingers in paint I would imagine it isn’t suitable for home school, or to be honest particularly nurturing for supporting institutional education. Mine was diagnosed from home, I’m not sure why you think home educated children don’t have access to Drs. @Nonunsnonunsnone You sound very opinionated but not particularly thoughtful. Did you have a regimented childhood or is this the product of a “hippie setting”?

FallSky · 08/09/2022 09:39

Tigofigo · 08/09/2022 09:34

FWIW I am not in favour of homeschooling as I don't believe that any of the hippie settings would have picked up on my DC's learning disability and possible autism as she would have just been left to paint all day and 'work at her own level'. I see some children who are homeschooled in my volunteer work who have pretty obvious needs but are just left to be 'wild' or 'free spirited'. I'm never quite sure who is being protected from the real world, the child or the parents.

Wow, this is pretty damning... And inaccurate, in my experience. (I don't home ed but know many families who do)

LOADS of children in school don't have their SEN picked up.

A lot of the time if it is, it's driven by the parent - sometimes being gaslit by schools who deny there's an issue because funding.

Sometimes schools DO pick it up but don't even tell the parents (and don't do anything to help the child).

Lots of the home ed groups are run by ex teachers, who are fully aware of the cohorts' needs - soooo many DC who go from school to home ed do so due to unmet needs leading to poor MH, school refusal, etc. The home ed settings I know are very open about this. Most parents are very grateful there is a place their child can be accepted, content and have better mental health even if they are "just" left to be wild (which is actually quite a natural state for children, certainly more natural than sitting silently in a classroom!)

This!

Petrar · 08/09/2022 09:55

I know two adults who were home educated and very successful in their respective fields, so your judgemental pov seems to be based entirely on your personal situation.

Sunnydaysunny · 08/09/2022 10:09

My school failed to recognise either of my son's two learning difficulties. I don't know if they were painting all day but they were certainly expected to go with the flow at the bottom of the class.

I took him out to follow his interests and catch up. He's now scoring in the 90s in his SATS and loves home ed community meet ups. I'm not sure if our very busy set up is protecting him or me from reality, that is a very deep and meaningful question that I will have to think deeply about.

He doesn't paint all day but he does have weekly tutorials with a local artist and illustrates his own books. It's all a bit hippie, isn't it. Sorry about that.

To answer your question, we considered sending his younger sister back for the start of KS2 because the curriculum presents a natural transition and she was more confident than she had been. Also scoring in the 90s for her SATS, we knew we had given her the thorough grounding that school might or might not have provided. In the end she preferred to learn at home, seeing friends and doing hippie things outside with other free children. It's reality. Our children work and play. Nothing about school is a reality that you'll have to face in adult life and can only get in school. It's astonishing inept she damaging school can be and how well children develop without it.

Sincerely hoping we never meet.

Tornado70 · 08/09/2022 10:13

We did the opposite. Sent DD to school for KS1. Her SpLDs were NOT recognised in any way. Her mental health was awful. We removed her from school. She vomited at school most days due to stress and fear. It was truly dreadful.
We took an “unschooling” approach. Informal learning at her own pace, following her own interests.
She went to college age 16, and is now about to start university. She works part time in a field related to her career choice.
She says she would not change her upbringing or our educational approach at all.
OP: your post is so judgemental. Different educational settings suit different children, for different times.

Wishyfishy · 08/09/2022 10:14

Year 3 is traditionally a moving point.

In state schools you have infants and juniors split out sometimes - some children have to change school at year 3.

In the independent sector Prep schools often start at year 3, so before that they go to other schools and there is a big move at that age.

I don’t think it’s that odd honestly. AFAIK Reception, year 3, year 7 and year 9 are the big transition years where children often move around.

Mistlewoeandwhine · 08/09/2022 10:21

One of the main reasons that people home ed is literally because school offered nothing (or worse) to their child with SENDs. I’m a teacher and home educated my son for precisely this reason. I found it so good that I home educated my neurotypical son too.
In answer to why the children are arriving back in school, I’d guess that either the children asked for it or the cost of living crisis has forced the stay at home parent to get a job. Home ed is quite privileged as it requires one parent to not work. In my case, I built up a tuition business and worked evenings and weekends so that our income was not affected.
As for it being hippy and just finger painting, both my kids are very much interested in science, coding and logic based subjects. They are both now in the local grammar (their choice) and doing well. The youngest, who never went to nursery, school etc until Yr7 was put on the highest academic pathway in a selective grammar due to his CATs. He also has lots of friends.
I think a lot of teachers are critical of home ed because they don’t actually understand how it works or how much some children need it. I’d suggest that you read ‘How Children Learn’ by John Holt.

zingally · 08/09/2022 10:32

Economic climate? Parents needing both to be earning a wage?

And Year 3 is a good year to phase kids in.

Dixiechickonhols · 08/09/2022 10:54

I’d have thought economic climate. To homeschool you need a parent who is available - that parent is now needing to work or work more hours for economic reasons. Plus homeschooling can cost money - materials, trips, classes or groups.

twoshedsjackson · 08/09/2022 11:02

A good friend of mine home-schooled her DS because they were in the throes of hose-moving and didn't want the do the whole settling-in thing twice. (The plan was to be moved before the crucial moment, but first "chain" broke) She was a full-time teacher before she had him, so a pretty fair idea of what he should be doing academically, and he seemed to thrive, and playing with his cousins gave him the company of other children; at the time, he was an only child.
Her experience was that he was performing well academically, but she missed being able to call on the resources she had in school. She would have been less confident in providing instruction for an older child in specialist subjects.
The house move eventually happened and he adjusted quickly to mainstream school.
She said the experience was an enriching one, but his younger brother went into Reception with no hesitation on her part!