AIBU that colleague is taking the p*** re sick leave?

[bluebellsandcustard]

Colleague broke his leg. No complications, but operated and played.

But nine weeks he's still off sick, with no word of coming back anytime soon.

We work in an office, worked remotely all through covid, there's no need for him to drive.

I just can't believe he's genuinely unable to work at a computer for at least part of the day.

It's putting the rest of the team under immense strain.

@TigerRag OP says they can work from home.

Presenteeism at it's best.

Hi OP. YANBU to be frustrated and questioning it in your head. I think we'd all be lying if our own self talk didn't say something similar from time to time.

But as PPs have said, its between the person and the manager. If you feel that you are under strain as a result, that is something you need to discuss with your manager. If you get no resolution, do your hours, go home. You working additional unpaid hours is not the solution to your companies resourcing problem. Neither is you getting involved in the broken leg return to work debate.

This

your issue is not with colleague- not your monkey

your issue is with your boss. You need to gather data about your unreasonable work load and discuss it with them. You need to make it clear that you are struggling and workload is unreasonable. Ideally you do not mention why colleague is off work, just “ during x’s absence” will suffice, and at a push say whilst you’ll step up to unreasonable work load for a week in an emergency, this has been going on for weeks and is not sustainable

Personally, I agree with you that it seems ridiculous. However, it is absolutely true that it's not on him - it's on management. It's up to them to both manage him and to manage the workload of the rest of the team and they're not doing it.

it's all very well saying, "he might really have problems" but he's your colleague, not your brother and therefore you aren't really obligated to kill yourself to compensate for his personal problems.

When my friend broke his tib & fib, he was non-weight bearing for several weeks. He had to use crutches even to move 2 steps, couldn't carry anything because he needed both hands for the crutches, and had to keep it elevated when sitting.

He couldn't even wash up properly, because he couldn't stand without using at least one crutch, and had to piss sitting down. He also couldn't bath, or shower safely, or even have a proper strip wash at the sink. He could make himself a hot drink, but had to drink it in the kitchen, because he couldn't carry it anywhere. Using stairs was possible, but hazardous, and he could only go up and down if there was a handrail on both sides.

So I can quite see why some broken legs mean you have to stay home.

Even though he may need to have frequent breaks (😏) because of pain, may fall asleep in meetings due to heavy duty painkillers/poor sleep due to pain, may spend hours on the loo (opiate based painkillers are notorious for causing severe constipation-been there, done that, not pleasant) and has to have regular time off to go to the fracture clinic, GP, physiotherapist. It will also mean that the smallest trip, even going to the loo or making a cuppa will take him much longer. I also know from when I was recovering from my broken shoulder it had a massive impact on my mental state, due to lack of sleep and being dependant on my husband. I ended up on antidepressants. It makes much more sense for him to be off sick while recovering and have a temp fill in and take over his caseload.

I feel your pain OP.

We have serial sick leave leave taker. Always a different reason (she like to give us all the details). Previously her other team members have have done her work every time she’s off. Of course she comes back to a nice clean desk while her coworkers have been working themselves to the bone. I’m now on her team. She’s in for a rude shock when she gets back tomorrow after her latest few days off ‘sick’ and sees that I haven’t touched her work. No doubt other people in the team will start to suffer but it’s the only way things will ever change.

Before anyone says ‘maybe she really is sick all the time’ it’s pretty much known in the office thats she’s taking the piss but being civil service it’s nearly impossible to get rid.

Cross posted with @LakieLady ....we were saying more or less the same thing. Unless you've had a badly broken limb, or is close to someone who has, it's hard to understand how incapacitating it is. I had to have 3.5 months off when I broke my shoulder and no I wasn't wasn't fit to wfh either. One of the difficulties arising from covid changing work patterns is people thinking that if you're sick you're still able to wfh. It doesn't always work like that. When your husband has to wipe your arse for you or help you shower, no you're not able to sit in meetings!!! (Unless it's with HCPs obviously!)

@bluetongue
Different scenario though. There is nothing to indicate this man regularly abuses sick leave. He's had one extended period of sickness. And with a broken bone it's easy to diagnose via xrays. You can't fake it, you've either got a broken bone or you haven't.

It’s nice to see sympathetic replies on here! It’s so true, you just don’t know what’s going on with someone on the surface of things.

Thank you- that's great information. Appreciated!!

@bluebellsandcustard Just remember, though, that some do take the micky. And management don't always deal with it. Remember my colleague who went water skiing with a broken leg or foot. Couldn't drive his car but could water ski. Bah. So don't beat yourself up totally because you might be right that he's swinging the lead.

@Completelyovernonsense

2 posts is relentless? 😂 Invest in a dictionary.

You'd lose that bet so hand your cash over. If I talked about it all the time, I wouldn't have forgotten whether it was his leg or foot. Find a post on here where I've ever mentioned it before. Should be easy to do if I "whine about it relentlessly".

There is a difference between actually having evidence that someone is swinging the lead and making assumptions that someone "should" be back at work according to what you think a particular illness or injury should entail though.
And in fact even in what seem like obvious circumstances things might not be as they seem. I couldn't drive for a long time after my accident, even when I was physically capable of doing so. I'd informed DVLA about my injuries, had my driving licence suspended as a result and it took absolutely ages to jump through all the necessary hoops to get it back again afterwards. I did lots of exercise in that period. My physio and surgeon told me to do as much as I could to try to rebuild my lost muscle bulk and regain fitness after a long period of immobility. I'm sure it all looked very suspicious to some people though.
Not that I am saying that was necessarily the case with MarshaMelrose's colleague and water skiing does indeed seem a rather unlikely physio recommendation, but the point is, things aren't always what they seem, even when you might think it is completely clear that someone is lying about their illness.

He wouldn't be insured to drive his car! But it's fine to water ski with one leg if your cast is sufficiently covered.

This ..^

This thread is two months old. He's probably back at work now!

Might be might not. It can take a while

I'm not disputing that (as someone who had 3.5 months off last year with a fractured shoulder, I have every sympathy with the colleague.) I was just wondering really why the thread has been resurrected.

Oh I see. I think mumsnet have started recommending threads to people on other threads