To send my DC back to school with Covid?

[TheChemicalsAintGotYouBaby]

DS tested positive on Sat, and was still a glaring positive last night.

He's due back at high school tomorrow. V few symptoms apart from a snotty nose, and DH and I seem to have swerved it.

He's desperate not to miss the first day of term, and I'm aware that official guidance means that you no longer have to isolate etc if you test positive, if all reasonable steps (masks, distancing etc) are taken. However, I wouldn't be confident he'd remember to do this (little scatterbrain!)

On the flipside though, I don't want to unleash a new infection that will no doubt spread through the school like wildfire.

WWYD?

YANBU - send him. Covids going nowhere and we need to carry on

YABU - keep him off until he's negative

I am amazed so many people don't know the latest guidance. For kids its 3 days then if no temperature it back to normal. Adults its 5 days.

No testing required, I would absolutely send him.

I’m sorry, it’s utterly exhausting. 💐

This seems to be predicated on the idea that the child can't be kept off without being told he could kill someone if he went in. There is of course a third option that isn't completely deranged, which is to keep him off school and not say any of this to him.

Oh absolutely - that is obviously the preferred way of dealing with it. Just as I would never tell my daughter that she could die should she go in.

I meant more in terms of how parents view the burden of protecting others vs the fear of your child becoming critically ill. Apologies for my ambiguity there.

I don't think it sounds callous. It sounds like a realistic appraisal of the challenges parents are facing two and a half years into a pandemic with the cost of living spiralling, a recession probably on the way, children who were in millions of cases simply booted out of any real education for months at a time plus a substantial number of parents having had to ask for very substantial amounts of goodwill from employers since March 2020.

But families of vulnerable children are dealing with all of that too as well as the daily stresses of having a vulnerable child and worry that they will become seriously ill.

So what is the solution? I’m genuinely asking as I don’t know. 😞

What happens if a kid at school has a compromised immune system? Or takes covid home to someone who has?! Seriously, what a selfish thing to do. All because your little angel doesn't want to miss the first day at school. 🙄

They are indeed, and it won't affect the position of a family that doesn't have a covid vulnerable child. That isn't going to make eg staying at home with a covid positive child when you don't get paid for it any more affordable. I'm careful not to conflate vulnerable to covid and vulnerable per se, incidentally, as they're not synonymous and some people become more vulnerable due to the impact of things like regular testing because of the potential financial and employment implications.

I don't think there is a solution either, or if there is I don't know it. What I am pretty sure of is that the climate where parents of school aged DC were proactively testing them has long gone, if it ever existed in the first place.

My best friends son had covid last week positive Sunday and isolation ended Thursday but she then tested positive and wasn't well Friday so she couldn't take him to school (we went back august) her isolation ended today. However she called the school yesterday and they said policy is if they are positive and don't have temperature cough or sore throat they can go whilst positive. He had a temp first 2 days then fine but she was unaware that he could have been back. They weren't impressed he was off more than the 5 days as she kept him off yesterday as she was still really unwell and school is not within driving distance. She was still positive yesterday too. So technically realistically speaking you would be aswell not to test kids at all xxx

As a pp said, Sat is your day 0, so you could technically send him on day 4.

I waited a bit longer when ds had it to be sure though - and until he no longer seemed tired and a bit “under the weather”.

Mmm this is another point, schools are now getting shirty about attendance again. Yes, I know it isn't the individual schools making the decision and they're doing what they're told.

We got a letter home last year after both of ours fell into whatever the danger attendance zone was, after having covid and observing a legally mandated isolation period plus a couple of 48 hour D and V rules I might add. I was not impressed.

Is that burden worse than the anxiety felt by a vulnerable child/their family?

If the burden of protecting others and the anxiety regarding serious illness are equal, what do you suggest?

There is no answer that will make you happy. That's been the case since the very start of the pandemic. You expect other people to do certain things that you consider necessary to "protect" you/your immediate family. When other people say no, sorry, we aren't doing this anymore, then you call them selfish 🤷‍♀️

Official government guidance is that there is no legal requirement to isolate - hell people didn’t always isolate when they got £750 to do so.

I mean, I don’t want people to risk their lives for my child. I’d - in an ideal world - hope people would be prepared to inconvenience themselves for anyone’s child if it could avoid hospitalisation/critical illness.

I’m coming to terms with that not being the case. But make no mistake, it is selfish. Placing concern with oneself above the interest of others is the literal definition.

I fully admit I think my daughter’s life is more important than a child missing a few days of school. Of course there are variables and different definitions of vulnerable but yes, I think the life of vulnerable children is more important than an inconvenience for others.

If that’s selfish too, I’m comfortable with it.

Yes, that is selfish too. I respect that you're willing to admit it though.

The desire to protect your child from life threatening situations is surely one of the most basic instincts we have. It’s the one thing most parents would do anything to achieve and so yes, it’s selfish - but anyone would feel like that, right?

I genuinely don’t think I would knowingly put another child’s health at risk if I could at all avoid it. I do understand though that for some people, missing a week from work unpaid could potentially be similarly dangerous.

It’s the system that is fucked, I suppose. It’s a system that forces us all to be selfish because truly looking out for others is not affordable for everyone. It’s sad.

We are vaccinated and we are living with it. Kids need to go to school and people need to go to work.
Op, if you've followed the latest govt guidelines then yanbu. I'm guessing you won't be testing again though, as will most of us..

Yeah I think most people prioritise their own and their family's interests, particularly years into a period of great difficulty when things are looking like they'll get worse not better. As I say, I think it's positive that you're so open about it. It's not a good thing when people think their selfishness is different to that of others.

Three days with no symptoms.

Which is not the case if her kid still has a snotty nose.

My db is a teacher. He caught covid and spent several weeks in hospital including ICU. He was triple jabbed. Anyway - if your ds is snotty, it’s probably not great to send him.

DS16, who works part time in a kitchen, was told to go into work when he tested positive.

He couldn’t say no as he’d probably get fired so he agreed and went in (and I had to take him in the bloody car)

people just don’t care about covid anymore and those of us that don’t want it seem to be in the minority!

People are advocating keeping otherwise well children off of school because they’re still testing positive after the guideline of 3 days.

I wouldn’t keep a well child off of school because I’d then have to stay off of work myself and not get paid. Why would I do that? It’s plain stupid.

The government know the isolation rules caused financial hardship hence why testing/isolation is no longer legal

The only reason to test for covid is if you give a fuck about the result and giving it to others.

As you clearly don’t, then yes, why did you test?!

Covid has been minimised by politicians and it’s sad to see. Having even a mild covid infection raises your risk of heart attack and stroke regardless of any comorbidities or underlying history. Eg you can be as healthy as anything and post covid, your risk increases.

I would keep my child off until they stopped showing symptoms at least.

It’s the system that is fucked, I suppose. It’s a system that forces us all to be selfish because truly looking out for others is not affordable for everyone. It’s sad

Yes absolutely this ^

Boris Johnson, that great champion of honesty, lifted the restriction too soon and sold us up the river.

Don't send him in; he is not well, he could infect other children, he could infect teachers. It could end up closing the entire school down. You don't know whether someone else at the school has a vulnerable family member; exposing them to Covid would be the last thing they need.