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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Was I in the wrong 😑 over food order at work

113 replies

Safarigiraffe · 05/09/2022 21:07

I work in a day nursery as a kitchen assistant & last week at work the Chef was away so I was on my own in the kitchen with hardly no help. Our menus work on a 3 week rota so as our supplier didn’t send in everything I had to work with what I literally had in. Some parents complained about the food as it wasn’t being followed day by day which my Boss told me about however I could only work with what I had & did go slightly off the menu. Fast forward to today the Chef had a go at me for going off the menu cos parents complained & apparently I did my own thing on the menu & also said that she was short on 2 lunches for this week cos I went off menu and used up what she was gonna use this week, I explained that it was because I had to work with what I had but she was having none of it. My Boss has sorted things out to get some things from another nearby nursery however am I in the wrong here considering the parents complained about me going slightly off the menu?

OP posts:
Original poster
Safarigiraffe · 05/09/2022 21:52

AIBU to be feeling upset over this or should I just get over it

OP posts:
MRex · 05/09/2022 21:54

The best solution would have been for your boss to have emailed parents to say what the menu changes were. That was their decision and their task though, not yours. Personally I don't care if DS's menu changes, pasta / baked potato / whatever twice isn't the end of the world, toppings would be different anyway; a quiet grumble at home perhaps is understandable if it was happening every week, but a complaint is frivolous.

SunshineLoving · 05/09/2022 21:55

Of course you're not unreasonable.

You did your best. If I was you, I would be looking for a new job. You don't go to work to be picked apart when you make a reasonable decision and try your best.

Libertyqueen · 05/09/2022 21:56

Probably in this instance it’s a communication thing which is more on the manager. Ideally she would have emailed parents to apologise and let them know that due to a supplier issue there would be some variation to the menu this week.

Original poster
Safarigiraffe · 05/09/2022 21:57

No it’s the Chefs job to check ingredients & make sure what we have in is actually in & previously she’s done this however she told me to amend the order & as part of order didn’t come in & I had to use up what she was going to use up this week she got very upset with me about it cos in her eyes “you should of checked what we needed made sure it was in stock & if it wasn’t told the bosses to get it in for me this week”

OP posts:
smileandsing · 05/09/2022 22:01

I don't think this is your fault as such, you used your initiative when you'd been given no guidance as to what to do if this happened. I think better management should be in place though.
I wouldn't be switching the menus around though, you may not think it's a problem but some children could have allergies so it could result in a child having an allergic reaction because no one realised you substituted one meat for another. For example my son reacts badly to chicken so switching beef mince to chicken would be a problem for him

MaryHoldTheCandleSteadyWhileIShaveTheChickensLeg · 05/09/2022 22:03

she got very upset with me about it cos in her eyes “you should of checked what we needed made sure it was in stock & if it wasn’t told the bosses to get it in for me this week”

I mean that sounds reasonable if you're stepping in during her absence.

At least if you have to step in again, you'll know what to do.

I really wouldn't worry about it.

OneTC · 05/09/2022 22:04

I'd be annoyed but I reckon I'd also let it slide unless they always were doing stuff like this.

As it is it sounds like you did a good job, it sounds like the chef is covering their failings by having a dig at you

loudlylikealion · 05/09/2022 22:05

Safarigiraffe · 05/09/2022 21:57

No it’s the Chefs job to check ingredients & make sure what we have in is actually in & previously she’s done this however she told me to amend the order & as part of order didn’t come in & I had to use up what she was going to use up this week she got very upset with me about it cos in her eyes “you should of checked what we needed made sure it was in stock & if it wasn’t told the bosses to get it in for me this week”

Ahh I think I see now.

Yes in an ideal world you should have thought, hang on if I use that now Chef won't have it next week so I best let boss know so they can order it in.

BUT it sounds like you did a fair bit of thinking on your feet and solved the immediate crisis which is pretty good and if anything should be a plus point. A good boss would be saying thanks for covering and thinking on your feet. Let's build on this, if it happens again try to let boss know what you have used up.

I wouldn't be upset about it, you did your best and the kids were fed. I find it usual the parents complained. Maybe their kids get a lot of meat substitute mince in their diet as they cook it at home too. Or maybe they are against quorn

NumberTheory · 05/09/2022 22:08

Safarigiraffe · 05/09/2022 21:46

Chef complained that I should have checked what was on the menu & told the bosses what wasn’t in however I just did what I could with what I had & clearly that was no way near good enough

So it sounds like the Chef thinks you’ve overstepped and adjusted the menu when you don’t have that authority, even in their absence. They’re saying you should let the boss know and let them take responsibility for adjusting the menu (even if they end up saying to do what you can with what you have in).

That’s not unreasonable. That way the boss can, for instance, decide to send someone out to the store if they anticipate complaints that are significant to the nursery. Or email parents in advance to apologise that they can’t stick to the menu today. They’re paid to have that sort of responsibility. You are not.

Whether the way you were informed of this was reasonable or not depends. Have they just said “We’ve had complaints. Don’t do this in the future, check with the boss instead.” Or have they said “What the hell were you thinking? How could you?”.

Mrsmch123 · 05/09/2022 22:10

Ahhh so you never ordered extra to cover what you used up. I can see why she's a bit annoyed🙈however it's done now and you know for next time

Original poster
Safarigiraffe · 05/09/2022 22:10

We have dietary sheets at work so all childrens dietaries are noted down for us so we would know if a child reacts to something or not.

OP posts:
mycatisannoying · 05/09/2022 22:14

Sounds like these parents need to get a life!!
You did your best, OP, and presumably kept everyone's allergies in mind. Assuming everybody was fed, they're overreacting!
Good on you for thinking on your feet, and it's a shame that wasn't recognised by everyone.

Original poster
Safarigiraffe · 05/09/2022 22:14

I do get the point of using up food and not ordering extra to cover it however I did my best & it was the first time I’ve had to amend a order, however the boss said to me that a complaint has been made by xxx mum & today the Chef said to me parents have complained about the vegetarian option of food & I did tell them that food was short this week and they didn’t seem too fussed until last Friday when they got a parent complaint

OP posts:
MaryHoldTheCandleSteadyWhileIShaveTheChickensLeg · 05/09/2022 22:18

Safarigiraffe · 05/09/2022 22:14

I do get the point of using up food and not ordering extra to cover it however I did my best & it was the first time I’ve had to amend a order, however the boss said to me that a complaint has been made by xxx mum & today the Chef said to me parents have complained about the vegetarian option of food & I did tell them that food was short this week and they didn’t seem too fussed until last Friday when they got a parent complaint

I think the bigger problem is that you didn't tell your bosses they need to order more food.

I get why the chef's a bit annoyed but honestly it's done now.

If there's a next time you'll know what to do.

Original poster
Safarigiraffe · 05/09/2022 22:19

Chef made me feel guilty by saying to me when I am away she always makes sure I have enough food in to cook however I can’t help the fact that the delivery fell short when I amended the order - for example normally they would send us 8 large cans of tin tomatoes for 2 weeks & they sent us 4 large cans of tin tomatoes for me to work with over 2 weeks so everything was half of what we normally get & some things were out of stock anyway

OP posts:
Original poster
Safarigiraffe · 05/09/2022 22:20

Yes maybe I should of told the boss I needed more food but for the Chef to go on at me all day isn’t on either say it once and move on

OP posts:
Original poster
Safarigiraffe · 05/09/2022 22:22

I amended order with the supplier but they didn’t send us everything we needed & it’s not the first time it’s happened either

OP posts:
MaryHoldTheCandleSteadyWhileIShaveTheChickensLeg · 05/09/2022 22:22

Safarigiraffe · 05/09/2022 22:20

Yes maybe I should of told the boss I needed more food but for the Chef to go on at me all day isn’t on either say it once and move on

Not maybe but definitely.

You're right though, I get why she's annoyed but telling you once would've done.

ChateauMargaux · 05/09/2022 22:23

I am sorry. you were in this situation and that it was not clear to you, what the procedures were when the order needed to be amended or the stock ordered was not delivered.

However, on a lighter note.. I told my 4 year old nephew I was cooking cheesy pasta and I gave him cheesy spaghetti - he refused to eat it and I had to make him the meal I promised him.. toddlers can be tricky customers!!

NippyWoowoo · 05/09/2022 22:24

I'm shocked that parents

  1. take note of what's on offer every single day and
  2. take note of the specifics of the meal their child has eaten every single day and
  3. noticed a difference?

I don't have kids but nanny and I've just been told how much of a meal the child ate at pick up? Like 'he had 1 lot of lunch and 2 lots of dinner' and I'd go 👍🏽

And if they told me the specific meal I'd not know the difference?

loudlylikealion · 05/09/2022 22:24

You are absolutely right they shouldn't have kept going on at you all day. That is extremely unprofessional of them

Original poster
Safarigiraffe · 05/09/2022 22:25

Feeling very upset about this to be honest The Chef did say to me after I hope you ain’t too upset about me telling you off about it but I just said to her well yes I am cos I did my best but just leave it now

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kateandme · 05/09/2022 22:28

I think you did really well op.try not to let it upset you.
the chef now has her issues over supply’s but she shouldn’t take it out on you.just keep calm and saying what you did was out of necessity.and it was because less stock was sent that she is without.
it sounds like your getting all in your head though and thsts making you more and more upset.try to settle and stop that now.
you need to be able to keep calm and recover from this in order to go back in and carry on.your thoughts are spiralling now leaving you stuck.
you are not in the wrong.the supply issue is.
and everyone’s facing the repercussions of this and feeling flustered.especially if parents are “those” parents.
mif I was a parent in the kitchen I’d think you were a genius to work around things and coming up with still feeding everyone.

do you feel able to let this go now.it’s just another one of those things that’s happened.
go in tomorrow as usual.and if the chef needs to talk it through then do so.just asking what they need you to do in the situation.

Seriou · 05/09/2022 22:29

Do parents really notice ?
14 years of school and I can’t say I ever noticed - or cared !