So I know I am being unreasonable before I even start but just looking for some advice on how to move on!
I have an almost 7yr old ds with my ex and a 8month old dd with my partner. My ex has a 5month old dd with his partner (she also has 2 kids from previous marriage). We split when my son just turned 3, so almost 4 years ago. I don’t have a great relationship with my ex, text messages is fine but I don’t like face to face talking, can’t really stand to look at him. We had a bad breakup with a cancelled wedding. His partner was a friend of his for years who I also knew. Her marriage finished around the time our engagement finished. I do think there was discussions between them during that time but not that anything actually happened.
Anyways I am really struggling that she is in my sons life, that she picks him up / drops him off / goes to football etc. She’s a lovely girl so I know I’m lucky that I know her and that she is nice & great to my son, she treats him like her own. Which itself also annoys me lol. Obvs this is a million times better than how some new partners treat kids. Which I know is unreasonable I just don’t know how to get over it. And I know I have to. I tense when my son mentions her name.. or when he’s on FaceTime with his dad and she’s there saying hello darling or whatever. I just instantly get annoyed. If she drops him home I can’t even go to the front door.
I don’t think I feel threatened that she has a relationship with him, this is something my partner thought it might be. I don’t know what it is.
Any advice is appreciated! I rationally know I’ve no need to be so angry /annoyed with her I just need to stop it but don’t know how.