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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Party bags, again

59 replies

FiveSatsumas · 04/09/2022 19:02

Sorry, I know it’s a perennial question on here but I’d like opinions.

Party for my just-turned-five year old. Kids will be 4/5, one seven year old. Not a big party.

I hate tat in party bags. Not just the stuff that breaks in minutes but the colouring books that go unused, tiny tubs of Playdoh etc. I equally hate the virtue-signalling brown pencils + seeds + organic quinoa type. Which leaves me a bit hamstrung.

I’m planning on giving a small Lego set (example attached) and mini bag of Haribo (or maybe one of those Bear / yoyo snacks?). Is this OK do you think, or does it look miserly because it’s only two things? This would be my ideal to receive as a parent but that’s not the point clearly otherwise all the other parents would be handing out gin miniatures.

And advice welcome for a total fussbudget. I’d look normal if you met me, honest.

YABU - bring on the tat, they love it!
YANBU - that is fine/thoughtful/lovely/less likely to end in the bin.

Party bags, again
OP posts:
loudlylikealion · 04/09/2022 19:04

Absolutely fine, put a slice of cake in there too and you're all good

dmask · 04/09/2022 19:06

I think just a slice of cake is fine! I also hate tat.

3partypics · 04/09/2022 19:06

My fave party bag recently was a mum who got the 10 books for a tenner from the works, so they got that, a pack of haribo, a bit of cake and she'd done balloons on ribbons above where they were sitting so they were a nice decoration that they all then took home too. Ages 3-4.

Hugasauras · 04/09/2022 19:06

Looks great!

I saw these today which seem cute too. Have bookmarked for my DD's birthday!

www.craftandcrumb.com/collections/biscuit-and-themed-cutter-party-bags

dementedpixie · 04/09/2022 19:06

Cake and a wee bag of crisps

sunstoked · 04/09/2022 19:07

Several times we did a book wrapped up and piece of cake, much easier and something kids could keep rather than bin.

CarrotCakeMuffins · 04/09/2022 19:07

Perfect!

nutellachurro · 04/09/2022 19:08

We always tend to do activity party bags so Lego is a good shout with some cake etc.

We've done a few plain shortbread rounds with a tube of icing and some sugar paper 'stickers' In a 'decorate your own biscuit' type thing Before and that went down well if looking for a cheaper option too

loudlylikealion · 04/09/2022 19:09

Hugasauras · 04/09/2022 19:06

Looks great!

I saw these today which seem cute too. Have bookmarked for my DD's birthday!

www.craftandcrumb.com/collections/biscuit-and-themed-cutter-party-bags

They are cute but nearly £5 each!

Cherrysherbet · 04/09/2022 19:09

Looks great to me!

My kids always looked to see if there were any sweets in the bag first😁. I’d go with a small bag of sweets as opposed to yo-yo bears.

Hugasauras · 04/09/2022 19:10

@loudlylikealion Yes, definitely not for a whole class party!

ZenNudist · 04/09/2022 19:10

My dc liked tat. I'd buy Baker Ross toys and spend quite a lot on good quality tat that gave a really good fun bag. my dc were still pinging stretchy aliens or throwing crawling octopuses at windows for months.

I don't like mini colouring books or pencils but maybe suit some dc.

Some toys are cheap so get overdone. bouncy balls, bubbles, but kids love em.

I said yanbu because I also like when parents do one good thing well. My friend did giant bubble wands one year which went down well.

The only problem is your nicely thought out toy might not appeal to all but lego is a safe bet and there's always one child unhappy.

BusyMum47 · 04/09/2022 19:11

@FiveSatsumas Looks perfect to me! Chuck a bit of cake in & job done! I did similar one year for our son - went down really well. All parents hate party bag shite/landfill!!

One year I was desperate to do something a bit different & took a great idea from a friend - I bought some cheap, white, supermarket t.shirts & some fabric pens so that the kids could make their own - that was a really popular one!

LimeTwists · 04/09/2022 19:13

Don’t dismiss the idea of gin miniatures, OP - you would become locally renowned for making the best party bags EVER 😁

Whatafool123 · 04/09/2022 19:15

I agree. Add some cake and that is perfect.

I also agree about right on party bags. DS went to a party with fabulous party bags including a hard back book. As he was looking through it, he opened a little paper bag with a few round brown things coated in what looked like icing sugar. DH and I said ‘ooh, chocolate truffles!’ and luckily we were by the party mum at the time who looked horrified and said ’No, don’t eat them, they’re seed bombs!’

Flutterbybudget · 04/09/2022 19:16

When my own children were young, most years I’d buy a set of books and split it, putting one in each bag, along with a balloon and a small bag of sweets/ mini bar of chocolate.
One year, I trawled for bargains through the year, and set a budget of 50p per gift (downside, it takes time) and did a lucky dip at the end of the party. That went down really well.

thinkover · 04/09/2022 19:16

I like the book idea. The lego thing is just more plastic to me, mine aren’t into it so it’d be random and go in the bin. £1 book and a mini bag of chocolate or animal biscuits or a slice of cake. I wouldn’t give sweets.

Needmorelego · 04/09/2022 19:20

@thinkover please tell me you wouldn't actually put a Lego set "in the bin".
The secondary selling market for Lego (even polybags) is massive.
Or just give to a charity shop 🙄

anotherscroller · 04/09/2022 19:21

My kind of parent 👌

NerrSnerr · 04/09/2022 19:24

thinkover · 04/09/2022 19:16

I like the book idea. The lego thing is just more plastic to me, mine aren’t into it so it’d be random and go in the bin. £1 book and a mini bag of chocolate or animal biscuits or a slice of cake. I wouldn’t give sweets.

Would you really put it in the bin and not pass it on to someone else or the charity shop? What a waste.

thinkover · 04/09/2022 19:24

Not a boxed set no but Lego isn’t a big thing in our house so I’d assume a little bit in a plastic bag is worthless/not worth sending to charity shop. I stand corrected.

NuffSaidSam · 04/09/2022 19:27

I'd just go cake and sweets.

Lego is still plastic and if you don't like Lego then it's tat.

Be the change you want to see OP! No party bags, just cake and some sweets.

Kids don't need a present for attending a party, they've just had a lovely time not been through a terrible ordeal!!

Original poster
FiveSatsumas · 04/09/2022 19:28

Thanks all. @LimeTwists I think we’re onto something you know. Next year the kids can have a balloon and I’ll do gin and those poncy boxed single choc truffles you get at French hotels.

I wish I had the resolve for book + cake. I’d like to be that person but I’m just not, even though my kids are finally there on reading books instead of hopefully nibbling the corners. I hope that Lego plus Haribo plus cake is an intermediary step to lucky dip of random crap <parenting goals>.

OP posts:
georgarina · 04/09/2022 19:28

A few things in a bag is fine, kids just like the excitement of seeing what's inside. I don't do plastic but Lego is at least not disposable tat. Other stuff we've had that are in between the two extremes have been miniature instruments (maracas, flutes), wooden Rubiks cube type toys, flip books, and mini watercolour sets.

Needmorelego · 04/09/2022 19:30

@thinkover the polybag the OP showed goes for up to a fiver on eBay.
I am slightly traumatised of the thought of you chucking Lego in the bin. Even the individual minifigs sell secondhand.
I may have to lie down now.....