How to work out what neighbours are like before buying?

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For example if someone has a lot of stuff for outdoor living, bbq, hot tub etc would you assume that shows the neighbours are quite tolerant of noise?
Can you ask them?
If the next door has play equipment then presume they will be ok with children playing?
I'm trying to avoid getting stung again. What should I look for?

Is it an option to visit the road on a weekend afternoon and have a listen? Could be very hot and miss though.

I would certainly avoid houses if the neighbours had a lot of "party" type equipment in the garden (hot tub, bar etc), as that would indicate likely noise for me.

Trouble is you can't really assume anything - appearances can be deceiving.

are you more worried about your impact on your neighbours? I knocked next door to introduce myself and did make friends with several or the neighbours over the years - but it's a lottery really as to who you get isn't it.

you legally have to be told about any disputes the current owners have with neighbours - so I guess that's one way beyond just asking them for their experience

Visit at odd hours to stake them out discreetly
If you've got money , hire a private detective for the week!

I don't think there are any give-seats for how tolerant your neighbours are or aren't.
You can try to spot if the neighbours are a nightmare by visiting the street of the property at various different times like weekends evenings, rush hour etc etc, see how tidy the gardens are, all that kind of thing.
But clues that show what they'll put up don't exist unless there are records of neighbour disputes which legally the vendors have to declare (ask the estate agent).

"Give-aways" that should say.

Not related to your specific queries but depending on the road/estate layout one trick is to go and visit on a couple of weekday evenings to assess parking. The majority of people will be at home and you’ll be able to see if there is double parking, pavement parking, a house with 5 cars spilling over from its drive to the spaces in front, people parking in a way that limits your ability to get into/out of what would be your driveway/parking space etc

If you think your own family are quite noisy and like to be outdoors a lot is it within your budget to buy or rent somewhere that’s not very proximate to other people? Or you could just ensure no loud parties/kids aren’t playing out too early or late.

If you’re worried about neighbour’s noise check local online forums and walk up and down the street at various times and on weekends to listen out.

@VestaTilley I would say that we make the normal amount of noise for a young family. Out all day, at weekends we are in the garden for a few hours, in by 7pm.
Happy to move next to similar neighbours. I don't care if they're noisy. Have lived next to students etc. Preferably not older people as they deserve to have some quiet time in their garden.

Bear in mind that your current neighbours can move too, OP and you can't vet who buys their properties. I do see your point - I turned down a maisonette partly because judging by the state of the place Onslow & Daisy from Keeping Up Appearances lived in the downstairs bit- and obviously do look for clues in their properties but it's honestly out of your control.

I live in a flat conversion in a semi-detached. Of my actual "adjacent" neighbours and the ones who I count because we share communal areas or facilities, all but 1 moved within 18 months-2 years of me moving in and the remaining 1 is on the market. I don't think it's anything to do with me- they made life changes & have changed properties accordingly- but it's all changed reasonably quickly and any "due diligence" I did would have been moot. I had no say in the new neighbours either. Luckily they're all really nice but I can't stop them selling on to the next Ted Bundy if he meets their terms of sale.

If you think you’re going to be noisy ones I’d look for a busy street, with lots of cars coming and going, kids out and about etc.

If you’re like me and hate noise I’d make sure you check the street at various times. Our road looks lovely during the day but at 10-12 at night we have drunk people walking back from the local pubs using it as a walk through usually shouting / talking loudly / singing etc. Drives me fucking insane and I’d never have brought the house had I realised as I can’t have my windows open in the summer as the noise wakes me up.

I would avoid near neighbours with bars, hot tubs etc as you have referred to, but I have lived in a small village for years and can tell you that one of the best things is to look at planning applications to gauge where trouble is likely to arise alongside parish council minutes. You would not believe the amount of disputes in a nearby village, but I already knew about them.

Another thing that really puts me off is CCTV warning signs and bloody cones put outside. Parking for a start, but what else?

Where I live is tucked away but we had a burglary where the burglars actually let themselves into a garage by taking the tiles off the roof during the night and letting themselves out the garage door with £16,000 worth of stuff. And we all have dogs, and yes, none of them barked. An ebay advert prompted this.

The only thing I'm worried about it being noisy and have people complain. I've spent the past five years on edge trying to gage what will annoy my neighbours and I honestly don't care right now if I move next to a crack den if my kids can use the pool in the garden without loud tutting.
House we're looking at has outside bar and hot tub and so I'm thinking that the sellers aren't quiet and so presumably existing neighbours are ok with that?

A lot of luck is involved - I was so keen to move near neighbours with no dogs (have fragile cats that are scared barking). Bought house and then neighbours on both sides and even at end of garden got dogs. They bark nonstop. 😐

Anyway. Yes if the neighbours or seller have a lot of stuff in their garden like hot tub etc they’re more likely to be tolerant of noise.

If you’re tired of treading on eggshells you probably want to avoid elderly couples next door.

Ask sellers who is next door etc but bear in mind they may fib a bit if neighbours annoying.