Tenants/Lodgers Contacting Potential Landlords

[IceCreamSurprise]

Name change for this because slightly annoying and a lot of people hate landlords, but...

I have a lovely large room in my house for rent to a lodger. I've pitched the rent fairly and advertised in a few places, describing it in good detail. Its really a bargain to live in that location in a really house.

Literally every single enquiry I've had has been rude and abrupt and basically demanding to come round and see it that evening/tomorrow. No information about them or introducing themselves (even though I ask them to do so in the ad), barely even a please, just "Can I come round and see it today/tomorrow?"

Is it where I live or something? Its obvious from the ad that I'm a female marketing their own home, and most of the enquiries have been from males, so for that reason my intention is to ask for basic ID to be shown by email before allowing viewings, for security. I don't think this is unreasonable but I never even get a chance to get to that stage. There was one tonight who contacted me at 9.45pm and asked for my phone number so he could call me. I asked him to give me his email address instead so I could send him my form, but he simply messaged back to say he'd rather call me and asking for my number again. One of the few women to contact me demanded if the room was en suite (the ad makes it clear it is not) and what brand of coffee maker I supplied! And don't get me started on the ones who think its some form of online dating chat!

Please, please, if you are struggling to find accommodation or even get replies from landlords, consider how you are approaching them. Just a little introductory statement, saying hello, my name is blah blah, I work at blah or I'm studying blah and am looking for a house share in x town. Its only polite!

I have put YABU because if you expect to see ID you should put that in your advert.

As for the rest YANBU they should at least have a basic grasp of manners.

How did you list it and how are they contacting you? Email? Text? Phone calls? Maybe try a different form of advertising and request applicants reply by mail, then you'll get responses from persons who remember how to write a letter introducing themselves. I feel like nowadays everyone just uses curt phrases and text abbreviations. Which can be off putting.

It's clear you're giving an email contract - good idea!
Those kinds of attitudes certainly help you with the shortlisting!
Is be inclined to offer a limited period of time initially - gives you an escape route if the lodger really isn't suitable, but nice to extend if it's working out well.
Good luck!

I don't want ID from everyone, I only say that when I get an abrupt message from a man saying "Hi, can I come and see the room for rent tonight?" with no explanation of who they are, where they work or study, etc..

Its advertised on the standard rental portals. Most of them have a standard messenger service so you don't have to reveal your phone number if you choose not to and so you can sift through. I haven't had a single polite enquiry out of 27 so far! I even message back and give them a chance to be polite, but that doesn't work either.

The ad is detailed enough I think. The problem is that most don't read it!

I am a landlord, and have experienced this. I advertise on a website where it is possible to obtain phone my phone number. A man who phoned at 10.30pm on a Saturday evening left a voicemail as I didn’t answer. Everything he mentioned had been covered in the advertisement, and the accommodation was not suitable for his needs.
But it’s not just people wanting to rent accommodation who can be rude or less than polite. It happens a lot when selling items, etc.
I try to take a pragmatic approach and appreciate that I may have sometimes ‘dodged a bullet’ by people revealing their true selves early on.
It is clearly more important than ever in your case as you will be sharing your home with them.

Honestly I think you might be misinterpreting the messages. Renting is so difficult right now, so many rooms are gone quickly after the ad has been put up, or have multiple people booked in. Asking 'can I view' is the equivalent of 'is this still available/are you still agreeing to viewings'
The rest - telling about yourself, judging if you'll get along living together - happens on the viewing. As someone looking to rent you have to do so much chasing, half the time to find out it has gone to someone else who called earlier/offered to pay above the asking, that you don't invest in every response you make to an advert.

I'm definitely not misinterpreting the messages. Thats why I message them back to give them a chance to let me know what they are looking for. I'm not going to invite every random stranger who contacts me into my home to view when we wouldn't be at all compatible as house sharers and without even knowing what their full name is!

I definatley didn't misinterpret the one who asked me how old I was and what else I was looking for. I don't think you realise quite how dire some of these replies have been!

I don't believe it. I just got a normal sounding enquiry, at this time of night, responded to say I could let him view and then he asked if there was any negotiation on the price - its £400 pm including all bills! He's just offered me £300 a week all in, at 11pm at night!

Honestly, I feel like giving up and just leaving it empty.

Don't bother renting it out unless it's to someone you know. Living with a stranger can be a nightmare.

Don’t tell lies. All potential tenants/lodgers are saints and landlords are scum. Get with the programme, sunshine.

Sorry he offered me £300 per month all in. Its late, I'm going to bed!

I'm over 50 and I have only recently realised how hard some people find it to take in written information. (And some are good at reading but struggle with understanding what they hear.)

To me it is really really easy, ridiculously easy, to read something carefully and know what it says. But I have met a great many people who simply can't do that. It isn't lack of effort on their part. They just don't take it in. What's easy for one person is impossible for another.

So I would cut people slack if they haven't grasped everything in your advert. The ability to understand written information is not essential in a lodger. Be ready to explain it if they ask.

Some of the other problems you mention could be deal-breakers, but that one doesn't have to be. It isn't necessarily rudeness or carelessness.