To tear apart my family?

[IzadoraTheExplorer]

My fiancée split up with me, said he wasn't happy anymore (and I then found out he was sexting other people during my pregnancy) so myself and my baby daughter moved out. He wasn't overly kind to me during the last few years of our 12 years together.
I started seeing an amazing man. Loved my baby as his own, treat me so well, was kind, generous, funny.. I've not laughed in years like I did with him.
Ex then wanted to give it another go. Apologised for all the times he wasn't there and hurt me, and he has been trying and been much nicer to me than he used to be. With prices as they are I can't afford my own place, I felt guilty about our child and not wanting to share her so I agreed. But my heart isn't in it. He's hurt me too much, and I'm still in love with the other man. He said I've hurt him but he still loves me very much and understands why I didn't want my family separating.
Help. What do I do? Choose a 'secure' family I always thought I would have, or go with as naff as it sounds.. my heart?
Please don't be nasty. I know I should no better.

Ditch the ex and go with the new man.

I think you are really lucky the man you want to be with has given you a second chance. I would take it with both hands and not look back. Do it now whilst lo is still a baby and it won't affect her rather than trying to stick it out for a few years then inevitably splitting anyway, only she'll be older and it will be more confusing. You aren't the one tearing your family apart, he did that when he decided to sext other women whilst you were vulnerable, not your fault the damage he has done is irreparable and its not like you haven't tried to make it work since.

I think you already know the answer to this.

if you’re on the mortgage you jointly own the own. Sell it and buy somewhere smaller. Or just rent.

Are you still with the other guy, too??

Maybe focus on setting yourself up independently and making sure your daughter is secure. She’s gone from her father, to another father, back to her father, and now… back to the other father?

If you go back to your ex it won't be a secure family. I'd stick with the new man.

This. You don’t NEED a relationship with either man. What you NEED is a relationship with a solicitor - if you’re on the mortgage, you can sell that house, get your half, and set up a “normal family life” with your “own house” for you and your daughter. It’s not wrong to want those things; in fact, it’s only natural. But please don’t feel like you need to tether yourself to your ex (OR a new man) for them; you don’t. And in fact, if you do, you’ll always feel like they could be taken away from you. And it doesn’t necessarily matter if your ex doesn’t want to sell, or tells you some shite about how you’re not entitled to half. Really talk to a solicitor before you believe anything your ex says.

A man who cheats when his partner is pregnant is the lowest of the low. Why would you want to be with someone who not only disregarded your feelings when you needed him most but also the happiness and well-being of his child?

^ THIS
Think for how you would advise your daughter in a similar situation.
if your happy and in love with someone else why go back?
if your unsure then spend time on your own until your head is clear and you can be sure about what you want.
it’s understandable to be confused after how he treated you before and his now change of heart:.. but a leopard doesn’t change his spots. He didn’t like seeing you happy with another man.