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Aibu to hesitate on puppy

45 replies

MagsR2356 · 02/09/2022 16:03

I’m due a baby in 8 weeks and physically still fine and able , however we’ve been asked by a family member to have a puppy that they can no longer keep - apparently thier dd is allergic and husband is allergic and can’t keep it.
i do love dogs and we have two friendly older ones and managed fine with them.
older kids help and enjoy the pets and we all love outdoors walking and outside activities.
but puppies are hard work and it’s a while since I had one!
We used to foster many age dogs and some puppies were easier than others.

however a new born into the mix!? Too much to handle?!

what do you think? Aibu to think it’s too much right now and would be stressful and unfair.
or am I over thinking it? And 8 weeks to train and settle it in is enough time?
I feel my memory has failed me in terms of puppy training and newborn exhaustion - I seemed to have blocked it all from my memories!

OP posts:

Am I being unreasonable?


You have one vote. All votes are anonymous.

Suzi888 · 02/09/2022 18:10

Only if you don’t plan to sleep.
At all.

Did you want twins?😂as that’s basically what you’ll have. A baby and a puppy, peeing, pooing, waking up, crying, whining, requiring training (where’s the time coming from?) exercising, puppy will chew, lick, teethe.

There was a thread on here awhile ago and I think the consensus was have a dog when the child is at least five….

I had a baby and a fully grown lab- that was fine.


PutinIsAWarCriminal · 02/09/2022 18:13

Bad idea, depending on breed, temperament, how well puppy is trained etc.
The first people the existing owners should contact are the breeders.


Hoppinggreen · 02/09/2022 18:14

Next door have a baby and a 6 month old puppy. He is away for the weekend and I am walking said puppy with my dog until he comes back (don’t mind, they are all lovely).
She can’t walk puppy with the baby as he’s a large breed.
Its too much all at once to have a puppy and baby. You have certainly forgotten what both babies and puppies are like


WiddlinDiddlin · 02/09/2022 19:17

What breed
How old
What is your *(and how long ago!) previous puppy rearing experience
Do you really really want THIS puppy.. as opposed to 'puppies are cute, I want something to snuggle and my baby wont be here for two more months...'

I work with puppy owners on a daily basis, honestly I would say no unless you REALLY want this and you have LOTS of support from other family members that is proven support with past experience, not romantic ideas that turn to dust the minute work needs to be done.

Its so hard even if the puppy is a dream and the baby is the quietest, easiest baby in the world.

If either or both are harder work than that.. it can make the experience pretty grim.


MagsR2356 · 02/09/2022 21:03

Thanks everyone the puppy is only ten or eleven weeks old so would only be around 18 weeks at time I’m due! (If I’ve worked this out right!) it’s a Cavapoo? I think that’s how it’s spelt only tiny I don’t think they get too big!
thanks for all the comments I am thinking it’s a bad idea and unfortunately I’ll have to say no to helping them out! It’s been a couple of years since I have had anything to do with puppy training!
ps love the swap the baby with them comment! Lol

OP posts:

Hoppinggreen · 02/09/2022 21:05

i bet they aren’t allergic to it


DianaBarry5 · 02/09/2022 21:08

My daughter bought a puppy in March and has been very very hard work. Biting, chewing, and the rest. Honestly I can't think of that with a new born. All puppies are different but most are hard work.


DianaBarry5 · 02/09/2022 21:09

A lot of people have puppy regret... maybe an excuse and not allergic


Riverlee · 02/09/2022 21:15

Caverpoos look cute, but they have spaniel in them, which can be a breed.


Riverlee · 02/09/2022 21:15

Lively breed


WiddlinDiddlin · 02/09/2022 22:26


Cavaliers are not that healthy, poodles are not so bad - cavs are quite chill little things though fairly intelligent, however poodles are frankly evil geniuses who want input ALL the time.

The combination makes a great companion dog... if you have lots of time and won't need to leave the dog very often or for very long.

They are spectacularly bad at being left without people, they are not bred for it, at all. They need to be with people, doing stuff.

The horrible phase of puppyhood lasts from day 1 to about 2 years old, possibly a little less in a small breed, maybe 18 months.


Bananarama21 · 02/09/2022 22:30

How old is this puppy. Surely they should offer it back to the Breeder?


Bananarama21 · 02/09/2022 22:34

I suspect she's not allergic but don't want to put the time in if it's 8-10 weeks old they won't have had it for Lucy law they should return the puppy to the Breeder not sell it on, appalling of them really.


Bananarama21 · 02/09/2022 22:40


Figgygal · 02/09/2022 22:47

Ridiculous theyve had it what 2 weeks at that age? It should go back to the breeder poor thing
And yes you'd be mad to take it on


abblie · 02/09/2022 22:49

I got a puppy and fell pregnant and it was amazing double the love

p.s. I was a single mother attending night school as well 🤣

Crazy but fun times my wee puppy passed away last year aged 16 xx


ScattyHattie · 02/09/2022 23:18

The family could surrender the pup to a decent rescue and lots of smaller ones use foster homes if thought of kennels is putting them off although it's unlikely a small breed puppy would be waiting long eitherway. I'd let this pup go to another family who can fully invest their time with raising only a puppy as your situation seems high risk for overwhelm & guilt and it's about 2 yrs before dogs start to mature and those prior efforts start to pay off.


CassandraBarrett · 02/09/2022 23:20

Really unfair of them to ask you


PritiPatelsMaker · 03/09/2022 07:02

I think you'd be mad. They should be going back to the breeder and if that's not an option then surrendering it to a breed specific rescue.


Isthislife · 05/09/2022 11:56

Absolutely don't do it! Although, sounds like you've come to that decision already. I have a 12 week old puppy and it has been enjoyable but really intense and exhausting. We don't have children and I have been thinking to myself just how much more difficult it would have been if we did. All puppies are different, and they deserve your full attention while they are training.
Head over to the Puppy Survival threads to remind yourself of the trials and tribulations of having a puppy! One poor poster just told this morning of a 2am poo in the crate which went all over everything 😩
Can't actually believe anyone asked you to do this!!

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