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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Behaviour in all boys' school, absolutely horrendous

79 replies

Jorisbohnson33 · 01/09/2022 10:35

I'm working in an Islamic boys' school, granted it's the first day and I'm new to them but my lessons and form so far have been terrible.

Had heads of year and SLT members coming in. Obviously it's harder as I don't know the names etc. Yet but I'm really hoping it'll improve.

I'm not sure being a young female helps too? When their head of year and deputy head came in (both males) they cacked themselves. Well one or two still talked but mostly went silent.

I kept some behind at break a bit and spoke to them about behaviour and expectations. I've decided to give them a new start next lesson.

I guess they're trying it on a bit, I can't understand how pupils can be so disrespectful to an adult who's teaching them.
Appreciate any advice and support.

OP posts:
Original poster
Jorisbohnson33 · 01/09/2022 10:36

Btw I'm only here for a couple of weeks in any case and the kids know that (SLT told them that Mr X will be here in a few weeks)

OP posts:
ShirleyJackson · 01/09/2022 10:39

It’s the way things are these days, sadly. Don’t give them an inch, concrete face, sanctions always followed up, phone calls home.

My ‘hippy-dippy, hearts and minds’ approach doesn’t work in schools any more, which is why I’m no longer in mainstream.

Original poster
Jorisbohnson33 · 01/09/2022 10:41

Thank you. I am going to just put behaviour Points on today and phone home, hopefully that will help.

OP posts:
VickyEadieofThigh · 01/09/2022 10:43

Jorisbohnson33 · 01/09/2022 10:35

I'm working in an Islamic boys' school, granted it's the first day and I'm new to them but my lessons and form so far have been terrible.

Had heads of year and SLT members coming in. Obviously it's harder as I don't know the names etc. Yet but I'm really hoping it'll improve.

I'm not sure being a young female helps too? When their head of year and deputy head came in (both males) they cacked themselves. Well one or two still talked but mostly went silent.

I kept some behind at break a bit and spoke to them about behaviour and expectations. I've decided to give them a new start next lesson.

I guess they're trying it on a bit, I can't understand how pupils can be so disrespectful to an adult who's teaching them.
Appreciate any advice and support.

Unless it's against school policy, I'd be contacting parents directly. My experience of teaching boys in an all-boys school where almost all were of Bangladeshi heritge was that the parents were horrified if told their son was behaving badly in school.

MiddleParking · 01/09/2022 10:45

You’re posting this on mumsnet from the school where you work? At 10:35am on a Thursday in termtime? And you kept them behind at break?

ICaughtTonsillitisFromAFriendsKid · 01/09/2022 10:47

Name on board and silently add a tally line next to it with each bit of bad behaviour. They will cotton on and if you narrow your eyes and hover the pen a bit, they might understand that you are serious, but will give a chance.
Either that or just write the work on the board, and the consequences for not completing, then sit down and drink your tea in front of them.
I've tried both at different times.
So hard when you don't know names but they usually tell you when you ask, or you can look at their book, or ask them to make paper name signs.

Onlyforcake · 01/09/2022 10:48

Unfortunately you're new, a temporary person they will push boundaries. But it doesn't sound like a good fit at this particular school with the prejudice you're exhibiting. Hth

Hoolahulahoop · 01/09/2022 10:49

I would get some support from management.
I don't understand Middle managements comment. there could be a free period ?

Sh05 · 01/09/2022 10:50

I hope it's not my son's school as they've just started back although they're not an Islamic school just an academy school run by star academies.
If it is a Star academy school they're normal teachers are super strict, even turning around to talk to a fellow classmate whilst the lesson is running can result in a behaviour point.
Don't hesitate to show them you are serious when you say it's their last chance, actually they're used to not being given any chances and they're chancing it with you because you're new.
Good luck with the rest of your day

ICaughtTonsillitisFromAFriendsKid · 01/09/2022 10:57

I don't think you're being prejudiced.

Manicpixidreamgirl · 01/09/2022 11:05

Are you in the U.K.? It’s barely even break time yet

TheEggChair · 01/09/2022 11:20

Report to head of year and call home, they will be properly bollocked by their parents. They won't pull this shit again particularly if it's a private fee paying school. Parents don't want to waste their money if their kids are messing around instead of getting an education.

Can the school send out a generic start of year letter outlining expectations for behaviour etc?

luxxlisbon · 01/09/2022 11:25

I can't understand how pupils can be so disrespectful to an adult who's teaching them.

I can’t understand how someone who is a fully qualified teacher doesn’t know that children and teenagers push boundaries.
This isn’t new, kids gave new teachers or subs grief 30 years ago and will do it in 30 years time.

Astounding · 01/09/2022 11:37

This isn’t new, kids gave new teachers or subs grief 30 years ago and will do it in 30 years time

Totally. I'm in my 60s and remember some of the behaviour at the comprehensive I went to being atrocious. The lessons were stop start all the way through as the teachers (with varying degrees of success) tried to manage the constant disruption by a core group of awfully behaved kids.
I feel for you OP. It must be exhausting and so stressful.

unfortunateevents · 01/09/2022 12:05

I guess they're trying it on a bit, I can't understand how pupils can be so disrespectful to an adult who's teaching them. - pupils have been "trying it on" since the beginning of time! Are you newly-qualified? Obviously they should be behaving but I'm amazed that you are surprised by this!

ItsJustLittleOlMe · 01/09/2022 12:05

Onlyforcake · 01/09/2022 10:48

Unfortunately you're new, a temporary person they will push boundaries. But it doesn't sound like a good fit at this particular school with the prejudice you're exhibiting. Hth

What prejudice?

TenoringBehind · 01/09/2022 12:07

you have time to post on MN during the working day?

Goingforarun · 01/09/2022 12:19

Don’t do the names on the board thing every time you write a name on the board you put your back to the class. Have something on the board ready for them to do as soon as they come in. Maybe the date, the objective/focus, Write three things you already know about this subject

PaulGallico · 01/09/2022 12:29

Are you in the UK? - Guess not as you are posting during what would the middle of a teaching day Posting on Mums Net on your first day is (sorry) really odd. If this situation is real then talk to your colleagues not randoms on the Internet.

Original poster
Jorisbohnson33 · 01/09/2022 12:33

I was on my break when I posted, not sure why that's so odd.
I've spoken to staff as well as posting on here, that's what the site is for isn't it.
I'm not being prejudice, it's nothing to do with ethnicity or religion, I've always felt that any male students respect a male teacher more sadly. Though I may be wrong.
Thanks for the advice I'll take it on board and keep trying.

OP posts:
Original poster
Jorisbohnson33 · 01/09/2022 12:36

It's also a not very popular or (useful for them) subject that they haven't chosen to do which doesn't help.
Once I know names it will be easier, I'll just keep persevering.

OP posts:
antelopevalley · 01/09/2022 12:38

The type of families who send boys to an Islamist school will expect their boys to respect the teacher. Respecting the teacher is an important value for most of these families. Ring their parents if you are allowed to. I guarantee the parents will be horrified and give their boys total ear bashing.

Goingforarun · 01/09/2022 12:51

boys are much more confrontational with male teachers something to do with testosterone.
Sorry to sound harsh but your break should be spent getting things ready for the next session it’s the little things that count spare pens the right equipment spare copies et cetera et cetera. And don’t get distracted by all the crap behaviour make sure you notice those that are behaving and give them praise. Things will get better but the SMT team have set you up by telling the kids you’re only there for a couple of weeks

grey12 · 01/09/2022 12:54

antelopevalley · 01/09/2022 12:38

The type of families who send boys to an Islamist school will expect their boys to respect the teacher. Respecting the teacher is an important value for most of these families. Ring their parents if you are allowed to. I guarantee the parents will be horrified and give their boys total ear bashing.

I was going to say something similar

In islam, teachers are very respected. I would speak to the head of the school and/or the parents. I send my kids to an islamic school and I would expect them to be reprimanded

x2boys · 01/09/2022 12:57

Jorisbohnson33 · 01/09/2022 10:35

I'm working in an Islamic boys' school, granted it's the first day and I'm new to them but my lessons and form so far have been terrible.

Had heads of year and SLT members coming in. Obviously it's harder as I don't know the names etc. Yet but I'm really hoping it'll improve.

I'm not sure being a young female helps too? When their head of year and deputy head came in (both males) they cacked themselves. Well one or two still talked but mostly went silent.

I kept some behind at break a bit and spoke to them about behaviour and expectations. I've decided to give them a new start next lesson.

I guess they're trying it on a bit, I can't understand how pupils can be so disrespectful to an adult who's teaching them.
Appreciate any advice and support.

If this is the Islamic boys school near me they only started back this morning and you started your thread at 10.35 am maybe gibe them a chance to settle in ?