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To ask husband to speak with her about coming into the house?

32 replies

User20188 · 01/09/2022 06:50

I don't know why this is suddenly a thing but my husband's ex keeps just waltzing into our house whenever she drops their children off (they aren't young).

She never used to do this and would either stay in the car or at the door, the most in the hallway if raining and they needed to chat about something.

She's not a nice woman, I won't go into everything on here but she's made our lives very difficult in the past and has been absolutely hideous to my husband on multiple occasions (really, really nasty) and has even gone so far as slating our DC before which I won't ever forget or forgive.

As such, I don't speak to her outside of the odd hi and bye if I ever do come face to face with her. I'm civil when we happen to see each other and have never directly spoken to her about these issues because I don't think that's my place, but I don't seek out friendly chit chat or anything because I do not like her.

Anyway, the past few times she's been she's just strode into our house like she owns the place, through into the living room and even kitchen last week (back of the house) to "bring DSCs stuff in" (it's rucksack that just contains the electronics they bring to and from as they have everything else here), they could quite easily bring it themselves.

I'm not feeling well this week and was lay on the sofa in my PJs last night and in she waltzed. DH had just been about to go to the door as he'd seen them pull up but she got there first and she walked into the living room.

I don't want this woman walking around my house whenever she feels like it and certainly not when I'm unwell and just trying to chill out.

AIBU to tell DH to speak to her and ask her not to do this. If she was a nicer person perhaps we could be friendlier but she's made it clear she's no intention of that over the years so stay out of my home.

I wouldn't even mind the odd time if she thought we hadn't heard them come in and she needed to pop her head round to speak to DH or something but she just strides in like she owns the place.

(No it isn't their previous family home, it's a house me and DH bought together years ago).

OP posts:

Am I being unreasonable?


You have one vote. All votes are anonymous.

GlitteryGreen · 01/09/2022 09:54

Did your DH not react the first time she just walked in like this?! I wouldn't be happy at all.

Definitely lock the door and either an SC can use their key or they can ring the bell. She has no right to walk into your house, how rude.


Pava22 · 01/09/2022 10:02

Put a chain on the door so that it one of the dc open it for her they still can't walk in


Arbesque · 01/09/2022 10:14

Just leave your key in the lock from the inside. Then no one can unlock it from the outside.


tiggergoesbounce · 01/09/2022 23:51

We dont lock our door.

Although you cant open ours from the outside, it makes me feel sick at the thougt of anyone, even people i like just walking in, never mind those i dont.


Zazazoolly · 26/12/2022 17:46

Is there some reason why you can’t just lock the door and stand in the doorway to answer it to stop her getting in?


Purplechicken207 · 26/12/2022 20:39

Had thieves open the unlocked door and take car keys and subsequently the car before, about 20 years ago. Admittedly on a truly sh!tty estate, but still. I didn't even hear them open the door. So just lock the doors! The only time our house is unlocked is back door if we're in the garden, front door if in front garden/car


Notimeforaname · 26/12/2022 20:42

This thread is from September

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