Should I unfollow/block my friend/ex friend

[Whatsshebangingonabout]

Have a friend I’ve known for 16 years, we used to work together every day for 10 years and were v good friends. She supported me through lots of things and I supported her through her relationship and a tragic and heartbreaking still birth. She moved back home a few years ago (I live abroad) and obviously over time, our contact has lessened, which is natural I suppose. We both had babies and she moved on with her life, me with mine and I’ve built up a large group of mainly mum friends, which has been invaluable. I still thought of her and kept in touch with messages, sent flowers on the anniversary of her still birth dc and posted happy birthdays on her and her children’s birthdays etc, she did similar but was never as forthcoming. She gradually never liked or commented on my posts or had much involvement at all, so I became the same, she recently didn’t wish my Dd happy birthday and came over to stay near me but no contact to meet up etc.
Ive seen her holiday pics with meet ups with an old friend who I knew too, who she slagged off and vice versa with this friend and I just feel hurt about the way things have gone and the lack of any interest in my Dd etc.
I think it seems obvious to unfollow/block her on Sm, but it just hurts a little now and as it appears we’re not in each other’s lives more, what’s the point really?
What would you do?

Why would you keep following someone and looking at things that make you hurt?

Put her in the past by unfollowing her on social media and deleting her email/phone number.

By deleting her, you open up space for other people in your life.

*In each other’s lives anymore

I guess you have three options as I see it,

1. do nothing. Everything's stays as it is or gradually reduces even further

2. ask her if she's ok. Reach out and express an interest in reconnecting.

3. unfollow her and completely end the relationship.

I think I'd try 2. You clearly care, and I suspect she probably does too. Maybe there's been a misunderstanding somewhere, but what a shame to not keep in touch if there was a solid friendship there. Would you regret unfollowing etc if your current friendship group dissipates?

Unfollow and move on, obviously she’s found things with the other old friend they have In common, it happens, people and lives change, but unfollow as you dont need to watch it happen, but blocking is a little dramatic

@Meraas I suppose I wonder if she sees I’ve unfollowed, I don’t know, I wonder what she’ll think. I wouldn’t be doing it in a bitchy way, but really, what is the point now 🤷🏻‍♀️I realise I put more effort in and deserve more than the odd message or odd laughing face on a story etc

If she sees you’ve unfollowed, she’ll kick herself for not having it done it to you herself first. And that’s no reflection on you, that’s just human nature.

You have done nothing bitchy, you are doing something that makes total sense and will bring you some closure.

@LastWordsOfALiar I don’t think I should be the one to make contact though? She’s been over and not said to me or asked to meet up etc…I see that as a pretty big hint to me 🙈
I won’t make contact asking how she is, I’d be open if she did…but she hasn’t really…the last long message I replied to, I told her about my mum having breast cancer…she didn’t reply to it, then a few months later sent a message wishing Happy Christmas and saying me must catch up properly soon. I realise everyone has busy lives, I do too, I just think I’m a better friend and maybe give out too much and perhaps deserve it in return…
As you say though, I imagine if I unfollow, that likely will be the end of the relationship in her eyes..

@Farmmum77 Yes, didn’t really mean blocking, just unfollow and not be able to see

@Meraas You think she wants to unfollow me too?

I was also really upset/disappointed at her not wishing my Dd happy birthday, I’d posted etc and she was well aware of it. Our mutual friend (the one she met up with) posted some really lovely happy birthday comments too which seemed quite pointed to me

Wow she ghosted a message saying your mum had cancer?? I take it back I’d be tempted to block her that’s rotten

Unfollow on Instagram and unfriend on FB.

will remove temptation to check in and if she does it first then you’ll be back on here posting about the audacity of her 😜

Have just seen your update about your mum having cancer and her ignoring it.

she’s an arsehole. Don’t think twice about it - get her ditched.

I don’t know if she intentionally ignored or didn’t see 🤷🏻‍♀️Perhaps I’m being naive there…or maybe didn’t read my message properly. On that evening I messaged asking how she was etc, she replied with a lengthy message, I then replied back with a lengthy message including about my mum and other things…no reply. She then sent a laughing reaction thing to one of my stories some time later, few weeks whatever, can’t quite remember…I ignored and then she posted the Christmas message, I replied in kind but in quite a cool way. Since then I’ve not contacted her etc and she’s maybe done a couple of reactions to stories that I’ve not responded to and been over to where I live but didn’t mention it or contact me..I just saw on her stories..and now the summer posts..I’m guessing that’s the end of the friendship? What is the point of it really

She has a busy life working full time, two young children, I only have one young dc…but I still think you’d reply to your friend if they told them that about their mum? Christ, even an acquaintance, I’d do a nice reply and check up on them after that!

Do what feels right for you. People move on and have full lives. While you may be hurt about it right now and not feel close, in a few years things could change and you could become close again. That's not always the way of it, but I'm 50 now and I've had situations where I regret unfriending someone out of being hurt or upset. Also, you can unfollow someone on FB and still maintain the friendship, which is what I really like to do when I'm upset with someone. Best of luck!

@AmsyT But there’s no friendship being maintained is there?

@Farmmum77 @timeforfunfunfun I know…this is what sealed it for me really…then things were a bit confused, I stopped liking pics, commenting etc…I guess she wondered why…but would you not realise you hadn’t even replied/bothered to check up 🤷🏻‍♀️

Friendships come and go, looks like this one has run its course. You can mute someone without unfriending them. That way you don't make a public statement, but hopefully it's out of sight, out of mind

@TooHotToTangoToo Yes, I think that will have to be it

@TooHotToTangoToo Feels hard that she doesn’t give a crap though 🤷🏻‍♀️